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To My Precious Mom

Updated on October 10, 2012
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Mom, it’s been a year

You are always on my mind.

So much has happened. The days are long and the nights are longer. Walking the floors and not sure of what is going to happen next.

Hearing your voice, ‘Deborah what are you doing?’

I went back home hoping to see you one last time. You were lying there so deep and so long.

The flowers looked good as I added some more. I sat down beside your grave as I read to you my book of poetry that I had written about you. The tears I shed made my poetry book wet and I couldn’t even finish reading the sobs were so many.

So much has happened. Dad got lonely Mom, and he has met another woman. I want him to be happy but he is different now without you. I feel different without you. All of us are struggling without your love. My sisters cry for you.

You were our glue Mom, you kept us together. You loved each of us unconditionally, and we knew it.

I was gone for a while, trying to be happy. It didn’t seem nothing made me happy. I did what you said I went to church and I prayed and I thought I trusted the Lord. But Mom, I think I let Him down.

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I do want to thank you for teaching me about Jesus. It has been hard and I have made more wrong decisions as I seem to always do. You taught me family was very important and I am so glad I have my children and grandchildren to keep me going. I am very blessed mom. You were always so right.

You were always so full of love for everyone. You made everyone love you even more. I thank God for you that he blessed me with an Angel for a Mom.

I went to your church when I was at home; I saw the pew you always sat on, and it broke my heart.

Mom I feel lost, much of the time. But I did what you wanted me too. I went back to my man. As soon as I did he was in a bad accident, it almost killed him. He needed me again after years of not needing me. He asked me to stay and take care of him.

So Mom I did. I stayed!

It’s been a long hard road. Sometimes I think I made the right decision and then I realize I screw up daily. I just wanted to be happy, and Mom you were right about one more thing! I do love him, I do!

As I say my goodbye for now, I just want you to know, I remember everything you taught me and I love you and I Thank God I had you as my mom!

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By: Debbie Brooks

©Copyright 2012 by Poet - Deborah Brooks-Langford, Debbie, or Deborah Brooks. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used for re-distribution, provided that full and clear credit is given to Deborah Brooks-Langford, Debbie, or Deborah Brooks with appropriate and specific direction to the original content. All rights reserved. Any violation or infringement of this copyright notice will be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

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    • Deborah Brooks profile image
      Author

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Love doctor thank you she was a wonderful mom,. an angel

      blessings

      debbie

    • profile image

      lovedoctor926 4 years ago

      A beautiful and touching tribute to mom. God Bless you.

    • Deborah Brooks profile image
      Author

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Lord it is so good to see you my friend.. I always miss you when you are not around God bless you to

      Cleaner I want to thank you for visiting and commenting I am so glad to see you

      Vinaya bless you my friend.. its my joy to follow you

      Summer thank you for voting up my friend

      many blessings to you all

      Debbie

    • SommerDalton profile image

      Sommer Dalton 4 years ago

      Voted up, beautiful, and awesome. Beautiful words and hub!

    • Vinaya Ghimire profile image

      Vinaya Ghimire 4 years ago from Nepal

      Deborah,this is a wonderful tribute to mother.

      I have always loved your poems. I will keep on reading. Thanks for following me.

    • cleaner3 profile image

      cleaner3 4 years ago from Pueblo, Colorado

      Deborah, first thank you for sharing this . this is such a beautiful write , your mother would be very proud of you. your write reminded me of my mother whom i have neglected and now feel very guilty . but i always feel she is here with me constantly . just as your mother listens to you and is with you, Debbie . God bless you ..

    • Lord De Cross profile image

      Joseph De Cross 4 years ago

      Mothers that gave us life. Daughters that know how life has changed, after they are gone. I appreciate your words Debbie. You are such a wonderful soul, and we respect and admire your inspirations. Have seen a pic of you and grand daughter Fannie. Your reward is already handed down to you. Thanks for writing this heartfelt hub my friend!

    • Deborah Brooks profile image
      Author

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Ruby thank you so good to see you my friend

      Gypsy my sweet friend.. you are so right Our moms are still listening and speaking to us.. God bless you both

      Debbie

    • Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

      Gypsy Rose Lee 4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

      Voted up and awesome. Debbie this is such a touching and wonderful tribute to your mom. You know she's up there smiling down on you and so proud of you. Remember moms never go away they stay nearby and guide us on our way. Love that picture of your mom she was so beautiful and now I know where her daughter got her beauty from. Sending lots of love and hugs your way.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

      It's a wonderful thing to go to the Lord in prayer and feel the love of our loved ones who have gone . Beautiful.. Thank you..

    • Deborah Brooks profile image
      Author

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Jackie thank you dear heart. I know what you mean. I talk to my mom all the time. I do miss her so much

      many blessings to you

      debbie

    • Jackie Lynnley profile image

      Jackie Lynnley 4 years ago from The Beautiful South

      Such a beautiful write about your Mom, Debbie. My Mom died two summers ago and I still feel the same, I just will never stop missing her or thinking of her. I talk to her many days and I feel fine about that. We will see our Moms again one day and that will be a very special day. Up and sharing.

    • Deborah Brooks profile image
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      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Lots of love to you Eddy my friend from wales

      God Bless you

      Debbie

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 4 years ago from Wales

      It’s been a long hard road. Sometimes I think I made the right decision and then I realize I screw up daily. I just wanted to be happy, and Mom you were right about one more thing! I do love him, I do!

      As I say my goodbye for now, I just want you to know, I remember everything you taught me and I love you and I Thank God I had you as my mom!

      I know that one Mom is looking down proudly at her daughter.

      Lots of love Debbie my friend.

      Eddy.

    • Deborah Brooks profile image
      Author

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Michele my mom was the most special mom. God really blessed Mr . God bless you Michele . Debbie

    • Michele Travis profile image

      Michele Travis 4 years ago from U.S.A. Ohio

      Wow Debbie, such beautiful and words. I understand. Lost both my parents, my mother in 1999, and my father in 2001. My heart was torn apart. I still miss them both, but now I know they are with God.

      Thank you so much for sharing such beautiful words with us.

      God bless you.

      Michele

    • Deborah Brooks profile image
      Author

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Faith thank you so much your words mean so much to me and what a blessings your words are too me. God Bless you my friend

      Debbie

    • Faith Reaper profile image

      Faith Reaper 4 years ago from southern USA

      Oh, bless you Debbie ---you have written such profound words here concerning your dear mother and the condition of your heart. One can really feel all the pain you have outpoured here into this hub for the loss of your lovely mother. The image you have painted in my mind of you sitting there reading your poetry book dedictated to her really pangs one's heart so deep at its core. I am glad you have written all of this out, and I pray it has helped you let it all out. As I have stated here so many times, I thank my Lord God daily for blessing me with the sweetest mother on this planet, at least to me. She gave her all, and when we are young, we do not always listen to the wisest person in our lives - our mothers who care and love so deeply for their children. You are blessed to have had a lovely mother too. Voted up and away. God bless. In His Love, Faith Reaper

    • Deborah Brooks profile image
      Author

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      sgbrown thank you I know there is so many people that will feel the same way.

      nice to see you

      Debbie

    • sgbrown profile image

      Sheila Brown 4 years ago from Southern Oklahoma

      Such a beautiful piece! I lost my mom 12 years ago now. My dad has been gone 14 years. I talked to my mom every day. Everything something funny or interesting happened, I called my mom and told her about it. She was my best friend. To this day, when something really out of the ordinary happens, for a split second, I find myself thinking, "I have to call mom!" We miss our moms so much, but I know they still watch over us. Wonderful hub! Voted up and awesome! :)

    • Deborah Brooks profile image
      Author

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Sunnie yes it did make me feel better to write it. thank you precious friend for your wonderful comment

      Debbie

    • profile image

      Sunnie Day 4 years ago

      This truly moved my heart Debbie. I could feel your every emotion. This was so beautiful, natural, from the deepest parts of your lovely soul the words came. I pray as you wrote this that it gave you peace and your mothers love wrapped her arms around you.

      Love you my friend,

      Sunnie

    • Deborah Brooks profile image
      Author

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Shining your comment has blessed me.. thank you so much.. I believe that too. thank you for reading it and understanding a part of me

      Love and blessings to you my dear

      Joyce my dear. thank you I know you know how I feel. bless you

      Debbie

    • writer20 profile image

      Joyce Haragsim 4 years ago from Southern Nevada

      I can believe in you about your Mother. This is how I felt losing my Father to a nasty disease when I was fifteen. My world felt empty without him.

      Voted up and beautiful, Joyce

    • shiningirisheyes profile image

      Shining Irish Eyes 4 years ago from Upstate, New York

      Debbie - I want to be sure and type exactly the right words to express the deep emotion I felt when reading this. It is human nature to second guess ourselves however, what a wonderful daughter your Mother has raised. How proud she certainly must be of the beautiful soul she played such a huge part in creating.

      Those days of missing her can seem endless and others seem a bit better. It is on those hard and questioning days that I want you to attempt to remember this. Your dear Mom is actually a breath away from you. I believe our bodies are just a suitcase for our soul. Our soul is energy and that goes to Heaven (my belief). The love you have for your Mom is the cause of the hurt and missing her so. Indirectly, only the deepest and purest love can have this affect on you, and it is that same pure love that brings her to you when you need her the most.

      Thank you for writing this and allowing me into your soul for a bit.

      Love, blessings and God Bless. XO