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Updated on March 20, 2018

Staring in the mirror, the pain within.

me, the wings of my sin.

My face, a permanent frown,
Pen in my hand, I look down.
Ink all over my fingertips,
the pen, like my heart begins to drip.

I clenche my fists, as tears fall
down my face and on to my lips.
Here, I remember it all.

I know what I'm doing , no mistake
Soon the pen in my hand will break
Heart thumping, mind insane,
My eyes stralling down memory lane.

My chest, now a faster pace
as my whole life , slides down my face.
In front, myself, as clear as can be.
I now see the old me.

No room for thoughts nor regrets,
Walls, smell of stale cigarettes.
The strangest man I had ever seen,
Like he was made of plasticine.

He moves closer slow and steady,
he mumbles the words 'are you ready?'
Through his hairy lips he continues to talk,
as my mind does its walk.

Again I go back I feel afraid,
Things I wanted but never made.
I remember your words , I begin to cry
Because I was your, butterfly.

I felt your lips as you placed your kiss,
suddenly I know why Im doing this.
The man awaits to begin his trace,
in that exact same place.

The needle , the buzz and the pain on my skin.
is nothing compared to the hurt within.
I remember you again , and take a deep breath in,
and whisper 'ready' for him to begin.

Suddenly am back staring at the mirror,
my sin now looks even bigger.
Permanent souvenir of my insanity.
Because I am me, a walking travesty.


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    • Leptirela profile imageAUTHOR


      2 years ago from I don't know half the time

      Thank you.

    • Keisha Hunter profile image

      Keisha Hunter 

      3 years ago from Kingston, Jamaica

      This was a lovely poem my dear, voted up. Allow me to go dust off a few that I have written and rehash that skill.

    • Akriti Mattu profile image

      Akriti Mattu 

      3 years ago from Shimla, India

      Superb poem

      Every word has been written from the heart. The thought process is so prominent here.

      Looking forward to read more of your posts.

    • Leptirela profile imageAUTHOR


      3 years ago from I don't know half the time

      Jodah, thanks again for your time and comment on my poetry :) you are kind. As for the advice, only talking from experience although nowadays it is a lot worse where young people are concerned and how the world works and they can be pressured easily it is a cruel world and we all need that little encouragement where possible.

      I feel priviliged having you read my work if I mat add, means a lot to me that you can say that being the talented writer you are.

      @LeeCloak thank you for voting up and reading another great writer's words. Means a lot to me x

    • profile image

      Lee Cloak 

      3 years ago

      Seriously seriously great poem, one I am going to read again and again, wonderful words, thanks , voted up ,Lee

    • Jodah profile image

      John Hansen 

      3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Firstly, this is a wonderful poem. It is amazing where you get the inspiration to write. For you, this time, it was a tattoo studio. Secondly I love the advice you gave Emerald. That was a kind and thoughtful thing to do and your advice was very good. Voted up.

    • Leptirela profile imageAUTHOR


      3 years ago from I don't know half the time

      @Marcoujor That is a lovely comment hugs to you too and great thanks for visiting x


      Always concentrate on subjects you enjoy and like at school so that you finish your qualifications to the best of your abilities. As for writing , it is something you already possess and enjoy (in my book you qualify) .

      As long as you enjoy it keep it as your hobby and you will always have something on the side that fullfills you. I rather write or read than go out to a club (because I have already been there and done that) and learnt nothing special. Of course it is important to socialise, spend weekends with those whose company you enjoy- go to a library read books that were written for your generation , reading is just as important as writing - once you start reading you will find you can travel places you have never visited, it will take you onto journeys that are magical.

      "Reading is food for the mind" You will learn a lot about people, life and the world when reading.

      Once again! I repeat - whatever those around you say it can only affect you if you take it on board, so choose what you take to heart. When you are older I promise you will learn that happiness is better when you think of yourself before taking on others' opinions. You are beautiful, I know this by the way you write it tells me a lot about a person just by the way they speak. Have confidence in yourself and you will blossom into a very special young lady, no doubt.

      It disappoints me when young girls are defined by those who don't understand them , because it is important to encourage one another so that you grow and be the best person you can be. You are still young, enjoy life and growing up - don't listen to people who don't know the real you .

      You are a little gem x

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      Thank you mam you seem to know exactly how I feel when get made fun of people tell me if I want to write poetry I have absolutely nothing productive to give to the betterment of the world you make me want to show them I can express myself in my poetry even how worthless they make me feel thank you. You have an insight into the soul of how I feel I will take all your words to heart

      Thank you for taking your precious time on helping me

    • marcoujor profile image

      Maria Jordan 

      3 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

      Your poetry is written deep from your heart and flows easily into mine... I am glad to have discovered you, Leptirela and will share...Hugs!

    • 4elements profile image


      3 years ago

      leptirela wise true words, wish more of us could increase to joys of reading and writing

    • Leptirela profile imageAUTHOR


      3 years ago from I don't know half the time

      Emerald, first thank you for following 4elements so that you end up here.

      Second, Never let anyone offend you for something you love to do, for example sharing the love for poetry and writing. In high school we have all gone through stages of being the one laughed at , at some point or another.

      Writing poetry is expressing the soul, some people take drastic actions when lifes darkness fall upon us, others take up a sport or many like myself , write. I began writing poetry when it was difficult to explain to people how I feel.

      It is an art to be able to gather words to create artwork verbally. If you can write poetry, trust me sweetheart you are talented. Not many people can do that. As long as it makes you feel better and happy then that is what is important.

      Never let anyone ever offend who you are, what I mean is choose carefully what you accept from people who have no consideration of others.

      Trust me it works. Continue writing and reading and you will learn a lot for yourself for your life.

      You will be happy with yourself at the end of school days. No matter what or who says what no one can be you - only you can be that and you have a purpose in life.

      I have tried to fit in when I was younger but I soon learnt I was meant to stand out. Same goes for you. I will be visiting your hubs amd leaving a scratch xxx be good to yourself

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      I follow 4elements saw your name after my comment I hope you don't mind me reading your poetry I am in jr high school and get made fun of because I write and read poetry this speaks to me and touches me thank you so much for your poetry it helps girls like me to want to continue to read and write despite the harassment

      Thank you

    • Leptirela profile imageAUTHOR


      3 years ago from I don't know half the time

      Thank you both for visiting and taking time to read :).

      Much appreciated

    • peachpurple profile image


      3 years ago from Home Sweet Home

      awesome and beautiful poem.

    • 4elements profile image


      3 years ago

      I thought this was awesome, blessings


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