VALENTINE'S DAY EVERY DAY - Intimacy and Honesty are key
GET READY! IT'S ALMOST HERE!
GET READY TO BUY THOSE CHOCOLATES AND FLOWERS PEOPLE! Infact, make sure that everything is totally perfect on THAT day so your special someone will LOVE you. That is what you want, don't you? There are so many cards in the stores now and e-cards and lots of places to go for chocolate! You can order it all on-line this year too! Amazon is rocking this year I am sure!
FAIL. FAIL. FAIL. This is what the new generation says when things don't work out right. Chocolates and flowers will not fix issues in a relationship and if you think it does, you are delusional.
LET'S GET BACK TO BASICS SHALL WE?
The main point is that you and your partner need to have a deep connection and discuss issues as they come up. Even if it is every single day. DO NOT WAIT TO DEAL WITH IMPORTANT ISSUES WITHIN THE RELATIONSHIP. Flowers and chocolates only delay the inevitable. Conversation and discussing things with eachother when you hit a "road block" is the only way to a successful relationship for many years.
The old saying "brush it under the carpet" can actually create "explosions" when it comes to unsettled issues. If it has gone on for years, you need to find a way to communicate and settle your differences. I strongly believe in couple therapy when it gets to "crisis mode" but both partners have to be willing to do the work. This is sometimes difficult when one partner refuses to fix things, talk it out or seek help if they can not express themselves to their partner because of fear. FEAR plays a big role in destroying relationships because sometimes one of the partners will not communicate for the "fear" that they will get some sort of "negative reaction." Sometimes a partner shuts down completely. This is a very dangerous stage for a relationship because it causes the other partner to start building a protective fort emotionally and then they eventually shut down. This usually happens when communication is not happening and one partner does not know how to deal with the circumstances and stops trying. Sometimes people learn this behavior from a parent or someone they grew up with and they take it into their own adult relationships. The thinking is "shut down on communication" and it will just go away. WRONG. FAIL. DOUBLE FAIL. RESULT...END OF RELATIONSHIP. NO MORE LOVE. DONE.
VALENTINE'S DAY SHOULD HAPPEN EVERY DAY
When you love someone you do not just wait for one day during the year to show them. I learned a long time ago about "LOVE GIFTS." This helped me understand how different people show love and it was very helpful in my relationships. Cards and flowers maybe something you like to receive, but what about extra time from your honey's work day. An extra hour to spend with each other on the couch with no disruptions. A meal out when the kids are being looked after. Remember that sometimes men and women have very different ideas about LOVE. I show love sometimes by nurturing my loved one's and going the extra yard for them. When my honey sends me texts and says he loves me, that makes me very happy and if I need more, I just tell him. But the point is not to put pressure on someone who is trying to do the best that they can. Think about a child. Do you expect them to be perfect all the time? Pressure on your loved one is not the best thing either...
I have also learned that instead of always expecting the other person to show love, how about doing something yourself first? LOVE always brings more LOVE....makes sense doesn't it? Anger only brings on more anger. Hate is a disease and spreads rapidly. Remember the more positive stuff you put out there the better it gets. When I give someone a LOVE gift (which can be anything really...making nice meals and special goodies for my honey or/and kids) it makes me happy to know that they are all very happy. How about taking that attitude FIRST before you put the pressure on and then let your partner "chip in" when they are ready. Sometimes I create "special rituals" for my family and I announce it. TACO TUEDAY LOVE anyone? ha ha... Just saying that makes it feel extra special! Try it sometime! Ask your partner to do something for you that does not have to cost anything? Use your imagination! How about a long and loving CUDDLE or a long walk holding hands?!!!!!! SOUNDS GOOD TO ME!
Infact why don't you start "The Valentines Countdown Now!" A flower from the garden every day until the 14th. Or a note in their pocket before they leave for work. Remind them of the LOVE and the magic and little thoughts every day will bring lots of ROMANCE!!!! AMEN!!!!!
LIKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ha ;
Hub Pages Author - GPAGE
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