ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Woe, Despair and Agony on Me

Updated on November 8, 2011

“Woe, Despair and Agony on Me,” are words reminiscent of a song regularly sang on the hit country comedy show Hee Haw. For some unlucky souls these words could well be used as a personal mantra. The next time someone thinks they're unlucky they should remember the following stories. Some, although tragic, may illicit a few laughs, others a tear or two.

· Violet Jessop was an ocean liner stewardess, aboard both theTitanic and its sister-ship the Britannic, when each of them sank. It would seem she would’ve been considering another line of work. However, apparently she didn’t as she was also onboard the Olympic when it collided with a British warship.

· One family on vacation in the Black Forest of Germany returned to their rental to discover the inside of their accommodations in shambles. At first they believed they had been a victim of burglary, but soon found the unmistakable teeth marks of a hungry goat, left on what was left of their wallets, passports and sandwiches. Their claim for compensation with their insurance company was denied on the grounds of negligence…they had left leaving the door wide open.

· A French woman reported her cosmetic bag stolen. The bag contained make-up, perfume, lotions and her medical-strength hemorrhoid cream. French police remained on the lookout for a suspiciously smooth-faced thief.

· Italian Johanna Ganthaler, was supposed to be on an Air France flight from Brazil to Paris in 2009. Fortunately, she missed the flight as it crashed en route killing all aboard. Unfortunately, she was killed in a car crash a week later in Austria when her vehicle swerved into the path of an oncoming truck.

· A tourist in Israel lost his wallet down a storm drain. He tried to retrieve it rather than doing the logical thing like filing a police report and contacting his insurance company. As he reached down into the drain he was stung by a poisonous scorpion who had made the drain its’ home.

· The Desarmes family was fortunate to survive the devastating earthquake in Haiti. Leaving the ruins of their home they sought refuge with their son in Chile. Soon after, Chile was also hit by a powerful earthquake. Although they survived this disaster also they didn’t feel very lucky having to sleep in their son’s garden.

· John Lyne definitely deserves his nickname of “Calamity John.” He has been struck by lightning, involved in three car crashes and broke his arm falling from a tree. As he traveled home from the hospital by bus, the bus crashed, breaking his arm again. It was Friday the 13th.

· Jeane Rogers runs a close second to Lyne when it comes to misfortune. She’s been hit by lightning twice, fallen overboard into the ocean, fell into an open manhole, bitten by a bat, mugged and shot at.

· Forty-seven year old Kenneth Charles Barger of Newton, NC, awakened to the sound of his ringing telephone beside his bed. Reaching for the phone he accidently picked up his Smith & Wesson .38 Special instead which he always kept on the bedside table next to the phone. Still half asleep, the gun discharged as he answered what he thought was the phone.

· A fisherman in Kiev, Ukraine, decided to do some fishing the easy way. The 43-year-old connected cables to the main power supply of his home, and stuck them into the river. The electric shock killed a lot of fish which floated belly up to the surface. Gleefully he waded in to collect his catch. However, he neglected to remove the live wires, and electrocuted himself.

· A dance teacher in Lisbon, Portugal tangoed straight to his death out of a fifth-floor window. Police said he was instructing his dance class on how to keep the head high by looking at the ceiling.

And how was your day?


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Lucky Cats profile image


      6 years ago from The beautiful Napa Valley, California

      Oh my goodness...I, do, indeed feel much better after reading, not really. Poor victims of fate...or failure to notice their surroundings, or, as this one (Italian Johanna Ganthaler) illustrates (and others, as well).."when your time's's up!!)- (aka "final destination.") Seems that way, doesn't it. Food for thought....well, only if we all employ a personal 'taster.'

      Up Funny (sorry...but true), Interesting and Awesome.

    • JY3502 profile imageAUTHOR

      John Young 

      6 years ago from Florence, South Carolina

      Well, I'm not giving up just yet.

    • Daffy Duck profile image

      Daffy Duck 

      6 years ago from Cornelius, Oregon

      How the hell do you fall into an open manhole or walk out a window? LMAO Talk abut not being aware of your surroundings.

      Love the hub!

    • djnixon profile image


      6 years ago

      kind of like carma.. it's gona get you

    • Allen Williams profile image

      Allen Williams 

      6 years ago from Pennsylvania

      Very interesting stories. I guess when you are destined for something it is going to happen no matter what. Hee Haw brings back many memories. I enjoyed this hub and voted it up.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)