You Purr Purfectly
If Life Could Be So Easy
I want one job and that is to be my cat and purr my day away
Up on a desk or a chair I will go and relax as I look down below
I sometimes do a 7th inning stretch then I turn my body around and do the hokey pokey then I go back to sleep
Listening to every sound being amused and just too tired to lift my head up
I have a tough job and sometimes I have to clean myself from head to toe
You try it sometime and you let me know
It isn't easy I have to make sure I eat or then I will have to get up and disturb my sleep
Sometimes I stretch my paws out and do my Superman impersonation
I do it well If I say so myself
Then ofcourse their is that itch
That makes my body twitch and shake
Only to make Chuck Berry happy
The day turns into night before my eyes get adjusted to the light
I have to hold off on the water or I wlll be embarressed with a little accident
We are too old for diapers and to young for depends
I hear you come into the house and you call my name
Like I am suppose to be as dumb as a dog and come running
Fat chance since I notice I am getting a little wide in the middle and the best I can do is roll over
Well that about covers it unless you have a blanket to tuck me in
I didn't think so that is why I put my butt on your pillow when you are out all day
I hear all the name calling and I won't let it bother me
Lines like... Are you going to sleep all day while I work ?
You betcha they don't call us lazy for nothing
I would talk more but I have a few cat naps I missed
Because what else I was setting the record straight
Cats can catch a fly you don't see
A mouse that runs along the floor
But you don't hear us bragging that we caught another one
Are average is 888 it is really a 999 but we had to leave some room for improvement
I would like to leave you with a list of demands
Next time you go to sit down look before you jump in your seat
A few new cat toys would be nice
Try vacuming more and taking off your shoes when you come into the house
I am so tired of cleaning my paws when I walk after you
Clean the litter box more often since your sense of smell stinks
I have to get back to business at hand
I am off to Kitty Kitty Land
Where cat owners fix the t.v. before the fights
Break down and call the cable company
For you don't know what you are doing silly
Here is some cat advice
Keep your paws out of the burning sand
Don't forget that can of tuna you promised me
Or I will make walk on your counter tops and hide in your closet
Until I am appreciated and you save me dinner
Try heating it up in the microwave
How would you like cold food all the time ?
Next time I would like a little slice of lemon in my water
I am a cat that knows how to live