ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Books, Literature, and Writing

Bizarre Books

Updated on January 14, 2013

Welcome to Titillating Titles and Twitty Tomes

On behalf of the Bizarre Book of the Month Club, I would like to welcome you to a curious collection of odds and sods.

These unusual tomes can frequently be found in book bins marked "discounts", "discards", or "dead-giveaways".

So, pull up a chair, strap on your spectacles, and grab a bowl of popcorn because you've got all you need for a bit of boisterous belly-laughter.

________________

Image Credit: Bizarre Books dust-jacket cover posted in dsharp.typepad.com/untitled

BEST BOOK BUY FOR WHIFFLERS & WAFFLERS THIS MONTH!

___________

Source: "The Wonder of Whiffling" by Adam Jacot de Boinod and Mariella Frostrup.

DIAGRAM PRIZE FOR "ODDEST BOOK TITLE OF THE YEAR"

For those of you with itchy fingers and a keen need to scratch your head, maybe it's time to register your vote for the "The Diagram Prize for Oddest Book Title of the Year".

Now in it's 30th year, this contest has a long tradition of tacky titles from which to choose, and the shortlist for 2008 is no exception:

-- I Was Tortured By The Pygmy Love Queen

-- How To Write A How To Write Book

-- Are Women Human? And Other International Dialogues

-- Cheese Problems Solved

-- If You Want Closure In Your Relationship, Start With Your Legs

-- People Who Mattered in Southend and Beyond: From King Canute to Dr. Feelgood.

BEMUSING BOOK BIN PICKS

So, what were the top three bewildering books in last month's BIZARRE BOOK OF THE MONTH CLUB?

Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?, by Philip K. Dick.

Milton's Teeth and Ovid's Umbrella - Curiouser and Curiousier Adventures in History, by Michael Olmert.

Stipple, Wink and Gusset - The Great Originals: Men and Women Who gave Their Names to History, by James Cochrane.

"The Book With No Name" by A. Nonymous.

WHEN IS A BOOK NOT A BOOK?

For those looking for curious conundrums to scratch their head over, look no further than these wee gems...books that say they aren't books but certainly possess a cover and contents that might suggest otherwise.

Take for example, "This Is Not A Book" by Marshall Weber, Ulrike Stoltz,Veronika Shapers, Damara Kamineki, Eliana Perez and C.K.Wilde published by Artichoke Yink Press. An exploration of language and mark-making, frankly what's not to like about these gilded Okiwara sheets with wine, linseed oil, charcoal, ink and blood? According to the publisher, "This Is Not A Book" can be read in places that are not libraries...and given the curious contents, perhaps that's advisable.

Likewise, it turns out that "This is Not a Book - Adventures in Popular Philosophy" by Michael Picard is not a figment of your imagination. What's not to like about a 'book that isn't a book' filled with philosophical puzzles that have intrigued great minds of many nations for centuries, insoluble logical paradoxes and moral dilemmas that promises you an intellectual workout obliging you to to confront the consequences of your beliefs.

Turns out you can judge a book by its cover, especially when it's not a real book. "This Is Not A Book," an art installation by The Cathouse Associates (Dana DeVito, Marcy B. Freeman, and Carla Rae Johnson), features "not books" hidden

among the real books and CDs at The Bruised Apple used book shop in Peekskill, New York. The "not books," which cannot be opened or read, are meant to be appreciated for their collage covers. Why not join in the ripsnorting reception and the "not book" signing for non-purchasers?

UNUSUAL BOOK NAMES

That may appeal to unusual or unconventional people

The folks from Ten Speed Press know how to satisfy the outlandish appetite for the off-beat in everyone.

Here are a few idiosyncratic items for your consideration:

Adventures of Cow, Too by Lori Kochek and Marshall Taylor.

Dirty Wow Wow and Other Love Stories - A Tribute to the Threadbare Toys of Childhood by Chryl and Jeffrey Katz.

I Bitch, Therefore I am by Ed Polish and Darren Wotz.

Jerk from Jamaica by Helen Willinsky.

Let's Get Primitive - The Urban Girl's Guide to Camping by Heather Menicucci.

The Cannabible Collection by Jason King.

The Wonder Bread Cookbook - An Inventive and Unexpected Recipe Collection by Wonder.

In case these don't satisfy your weird and wacky tastebuds, maybe the following books by other publishers will whet your appetite:

Harvey Slumfenburger's Christmas Present by John Burningham.

Born Standing Up by Steve Martin.

Life on the Refrigerator Door - A Novel in Notes by Alice Kuipers.

SPEAKING OF TOMES ON TIME TRAVEL...

Have you ever read Dr. Dan Streetmentioner's "Time Travelers' Handbook of 1001 Tense Formations", which teaches you how to speak in the Future Semiconditionally Modified Subinverted Plagal Past Subjunctive Intentional?

AND NOW A FEW WORDS FROM...?

Note written in haste, together with the accompanying photo, (found hanging precariously on the entrance door of a special bizarre book collection at a local libarary).

Out of my mind. Back in 5 minutes.

(In the meantime, feel free to peruse the latest addition to our collection, "Things That Bite Back", by Edward Tenner.)

All About Bibliophiles and Bookworms

For the benefit of those bleeping bods with a scanty knowledge of "bibliophilia" or bookworms for that matter, the following glossary should help:

biblioclast - one who destroys books, notably bibles

bibliognost - one with a complete (pedantic) knowledge of books

biblioklept - a book thief

bibliokleptomaniac - an insane book thief

bibliolater - one overly devoted to books; one having an excessive reverence for the letter of the Bible

bibliomancy - divination by books, notably religious texts

bibliomane - an indiscrimate hoarder of books

bibliopegy - (the finer forms of) bookbinding

bibliophagist - one who usually (metaphorically) eats books

bibliophobia - a morbid fear of books

bibliopoesy - the construction of books

bibliopole - one who sells or deals in books

bibliotaph - one who "buries" books by keeping them locked away

bibliothecary - a librarian

___________

Source: Ben Schott's Essay appearing in the New York Times Book Review entitled, The Bibliognost's Handbook. The author also provides a saucy sample of odd book titles penned under the heading: A gallimaufry of bibliognostic miscellany for the festive Porcus Literarum.

FUNNY PHOBIAS

For those who have a ravenous appetite for the written word

Who said patrons of pocketbooks don't have a few phobias to overcome besides running amok in used bookstores, trying to outwit book trolls in libraries, or reading things between the lines?

Bashful browsers and boisterous bibliomaniacs all share one thing in common...a fascination with the written word.

There are however a few funny phobias which come to mind when talking about reading and writing.

abibliophobia - a fear of being without books (especially on a desert island with no bathing beauties or hunks to distract one's attention)

graphophobia - a fear of writing (and who wouldn't be with so many english teachers and literary critics around!

logophobia - a fear of words (more likely a fate worse than death, the fine print in all legal contracts)

onomatophobia fear of words or a certain word (a problem if you're a poet, a preacher, or politician)

phronemophobia - fear of thinking (no wonder there are so many dimwits, dolts, and dunderheads found in high places)

scriptophobia - writing in public (which is probably why little loo libraries are so popular)

sesquipedalophobia - a morbid fear of long words (which is usually accompanied by a fatal fear of commas, dashes, and exclamation points!)

sophophobia - fear of wisdom or learning (no wonder pet rocks, slinkies, and candy floss were invented)

TITILLATING TITLES TO TICKLE YOU PINK

Or simply munch on for next meal of mirth and merriment

Here's a sample of some titillating titles to tickle your funnybone:

Au Pied de Cochon - The Album, a self-published cookbook by Marin Picard, a chef who would never serve his customers a "pig-in-a-poke"!

Shroom: A Cultural History of the Magic Mushroom by Andy Letcher, for those who need to know why boisterous brownies are always dancing around toadstools and munching on mushrooms.

Survival of the Sickest: A Medical Maverick Discovers Why We Need Disease by Sharon Moalem, Ph.D.. Hmmm...has this got anything to do with the plethora of profits being made by giant pharmaceutical companies and medical equipment manufacturers?

I Feel Bad About My Neck by Nora Ephron. Will next year's sequel feature cheeks or love handles?

The Omnivore's Dilemma: The Natural History of Four Meals by Michael Pollan. Warning: this tasty tidbit may not satiate the voracious appetite of verbivores.

It's Okay to Miss the Bed on the First Jump by John O'Hurley. For those who have difficulty counting sheep while awaiting the arrival of the Sandman.

The End: (A Series of Unfortunate Events, Book 13) by Lemony Snicket and Brett Helquist. It's hard to know what they'll do for an encore unless it has something to do with ressurection and the second coming of the whole kit and kaboodle!

Heat: An Amateur's Adventures as Kitchen Slave, Line Cook, Pasta-Maker and Apprentice to a Dante-Quoting Butcher in Tuscany by Bill Buford. The only question is, can he sing opera while slinging the spaghetti?

Reaching Climax and Other Towns Along the American Highway by Gary Gladstone. Almost as much fun as his last loopy piece of literature about off-beaten track, out-of-the-way places in America called, Passing Gas.

Unscrewed - The Consumer's Guide to Getting What You Paid For by Ron Burley. Hmmm...by eliminating the "Twist and Shout", someone's taken all my fun out of shopping.

Why Cats Paint, A Theory of Feline Aaesthetics by Burton Silver and Heather Busch. Surely this has to be the cat's meow if not the cats pyjamas!

______________

Image Credit: bookmuncher - tinakugler.blogspot.com

PATHETIC POCKETBOOK PROSE

Titles that may tickle your funnybone

George Carlin had the right idea twenty-five years ago when he used a great routine called, The Book Club.

He recommended the following imaginary titles to cheer up even the most exhausting Eeyores around:

Rid Yourself of Doubt, or Should You?

Tremble Your Way to Fitness

Reorganizing Your Pockets

What to Wear On the Toilet

A Treasury of Poorly-Understood Ideas

Backpacking for Shut-Ins

I Gave Up Hope and Died, and It Worked

For those who need no know more about books that can't be easily categorized (such as those that do not exist, those that are too heavy to lift, or those that have been chewed unmercifully by hungry children or pesky pets, please consult The Interstitial Library's Circulating Collection).

WICKED WORDS & WORKS

A boffo bedtime book collection.

Wicked Words 10: The Best of Wicked Words (v. 10)
Wicked Words 10: The Best of Wicked Words (v. 10)

Will appeal to wicked wenches and witty witches.

 
Wicked Wee Words: For Competitive Word Games
Wicked Wee Words: For Competitive Word Games

For those who are into head games what else!

 
The Wicked Wit of Women (The Wicked Wit of series)
The Wicked Wit of Women (The Wicked Wit of series)

Not your average dainty damsels-in-distress!

 

PITHY POCKET BOOK POLL - Just imagine if this was a real ripsnorting romance novel, who are the colorful characters and what's the plot line?

____________

Image Credit: scobberlotch.blogspot.com/2010/02

If this were a real ripsnorting romance novel, how would you describe the plot line?

See results

THE BELIEVE IT OR NOT BOOKSHELF

Bizarre book bibliophiles will like these little links.

MIRTHFUL MEMORABILIA

Beware of Bodacious Bookworms

Mysterious things can often be found lying tucked away in bottom drawers, not to mention dusty filing cabinets and travel trunks in the attic.

Apparently one American library has managed to acquire a rather fine collection of eccentric ephemera belonging to a former maven of mirth, Molly Ivvins.

Several intriguing items include:

At Least I Had Fun Doing These, a copy of a 1979 book by Charles N. Granville.

Bush Lost - Get Over It!, a well-preserved 1994 bumper sticker.

Hail To The Thief, CD

Loopholes in the Bible Belt, an undated transcript by Greg Bass.

On Condition of Anonymity, an undated 45 rmp record.

Presidential Biblical Scoreboard, a positively perplexing periodical published in Texas, dated 1988.

Shrub: The Short But Happy Political Life of George W. Bush, a copy of Molly Ivvins' book published at the turn of the new millennium.

The Nobody Show, one cassette tape covering the period October 1993 - January 1994.

Who Let the Dogs In? Incredible Political Animals I Have Known, manuscript by Molly Ivvins (2004).

_____________

Image Credit: Bookworm - fotosearch.com/thumbnail FSB050.jpg

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

STRANGE BOOK TITLES

To satisfy strange tests

Scratching your head wondering what you're going to get for the person who seems to have everything, perhaps you can snap up these baffling book titles from the Bookworms Book Bin before they're lost and gone forever!

How to Avoid Huge Ships by John W. Trimmer

Be Bold With Bananas (Crescent Books)

Fancy Coffins to Make for Yourself by Dale L. Power

The Devil's Cloth: The History of Stripes by Michel Pastoureaut

Across Europe by Kangaroo by Joseph R. Barry

The Making of a Moron by Niall Brennan

The Flat-Footed Flies of Europe by Peter J. Chandler

Lightweight Sandwich Construction by J.M. Davies

How to Be A Pope: What to Do and Where to Go Once You're in the Vatican by Piers Marchant

____________

Image Credit:

"A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking."

-- Jerry Seinfeld --

50 BIZARRE BOOKS FOR BOOKWORMS

Bizarre books - for the glee-challenged, know-it-alls, and those who seem to have everything.

How to Hold a Crocodile
How to Hold a Crocodile

For those who don't have a platypus to play with.

 
Bizarre Books
Bizarre Books

For the curious collector of cockamamie book titles.

 
The Original Road Kill Cookbook
The Original Road Kill Cookbook

Road warriors will never be the same!

 
White Trash Etiquette: The Definitive Guide to Upscale Trailer Park Manners
White Trash Etiquette: The Definitive Guide to Upscale Trailer Park Manners

Tricks of the trade from "Trailer Park Boys".

 
Ask the Fruitcake Lady: Everything You Would Already Know If You Had Any Sense
Ask the Fruitcake Lady: Everything You Would Already Know If You Had Any Sense

"Red Hat" ladies will love this book!

 
Passing Gas: And Other Towns Along the American Highway
Passing Gas: And Other Towns Along the American Highway

A roadtrip to some pretty pecular places.

 
The Government Manual for New Superheroes
The Government Manual for New Superheroes

You mean bleeping bureaucrats need help?

 
Uncle John's Gigantic Bathroom Reader (Uncle John's Bathroom Readers)
Uncle John's Gigantic Bathroom Reader (Uncle John's Bathroom Readers)

This one is heavy reading -- it tips the scale at over 700 pages of hard-to-find if not entirely bizarre facts.

 
The Darwin Awards Boxed Set (1-3)
The Darwin Awards Boxed Set (1-3)

A who's who on where some folks are on the food chain.

 
Roadkill (Kinky Friedman Novels)
Roadkill (Kinky Friedman Novels)

If you love thin plot lines & politically-incorrect protagonists...

 
Armadillos & Old Lace
Armadillos & Old Lace

Great addition to your Little Loo Library!

 
Sweet Potato Queens' Big-Ass Box of Love
Sweet Potato Queens' Big-Ass Box of Love

So you wanna be Sweet Potato Queen for a day?

 
Princess Smartypants (Picture Puffin)
Princess Smartypants (Picture Puffin)

The spouse of Prince Swashbuckle naturally!

 
The Portable Door
The Portable Door

You mean every office doesn't have one?

 
Gargoyle 41 (No.41)
Gargoyle 41 (No.41)

This one is bound to keep the goblins away!

 
FOOP!
FOOP!

Time travel tourism at its best!

 
Nostradamus Ate My Hamster
Nostradamus Ate My Hamster

If you love odd + occult, you'll love this!

 
Paint Your Dragon
Paint Your Dragon

More challenging than painting-by-numbers.

 
The Woman Who Gave Birth to Rabbits: Stories
The Woman Who Gave Birth to Rabbits: Stories

Quite simply, it's a peculiar pocketbook.

 
That Darn Squid God
That Darn Squid God

A fantastically funny end-of-the-world tale.

 
The Thackery T. Lambshead Pocket Guide to Eccentric and Discredited Diseases
The Thackery T. Lambshead Pocket Guide to Eccentric and Discredited Diseases

Do you suffer from "third-eye infection"?

 
The Epiplectic Bicycle
The Epiplectic Bicycle

A fine piece of quirky art and weird text.

 
The Restaurant at the End of the Universe
The Restaurant at the End of the Universe

An earful of Arthur Dent & Zaphod Beeblebrox.

 
Orbiting the Giant Hairball: A Corporate Fool's Guide to Surviving with Grace
Orbiting the Giant Hairball: A Corporate Fool's Guide to Surviving with Grace

For those with a bad-hair day & other dilemmas.

 
If You Can't Say Anything Nice, Say It In Yiddish
If You Can't Say Anything Nice, Say It In Yiddish

All the yuk yuks you need in Yiddish naturally.

 
How To Seduce, Pleasure and Titillate in Classical Latin
How To Seduce, Pleasure and Titillate in Classical Latin

Classical Latin lovers will adore this little gem.

 

Cheeky Choice for the Happy Holiday Season

The Bizarre Book of the Month Club presents, "Santa Claws" by author Laura Lueck and illustrator Gris Grimly.

This is mischievously macabre Christmas story is reserved for weird wunderkins who like their humor gross and their satires snappy.

Frankly, what's not to like about a couple of kids with visions of boogerplums dancing through their heads who enjoy hanging up their smelly socks and blistertoe, decorating their dead pine tree, and making poisonberry pies for the holidays?

Comments from curious collectors and bizarre bookworms welcome. - Please feel free to leave the title of a bizarre book you'd like to recommend.

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • profile image

      jimmyworldstar 5 years ago

      Great lens, are those terms about bibliowhatever and being afraid of certain words and patterns real? I've heard of bizarre phobias and terms but that's just too crazy.

    • profile image

      anonymous 6 years ago

      Nice Lens. Entertaining.

    • profile image

      anonymous 6 years ago

      Even google is confused by this page...

      they advertise an on-line Islam course below...

    • LabKittyDesign profile image

      LabKittyDesign 6 years ago

      Secret Museum of ManKind is pretty Out There, and it has a site on the web... Great lens!

    • profile image

      Fit_Over_40_Buzz 7 years ago

      Very nice lens. Thanks. I gave you a thumbs up, because it's a nice lens.

    • profile image

      Steve_Lundin 8 years ago

      Very nice lens! You've got a very interesting collection of books and resources in this lens. When you have a chance, please visit my lens Shooting An Albatross and say hi.

    • profile image

      anonymous 8 years ago

      Dear Sir

      I wondered if you might like a mutual link to my English word website or press release details of my ensuing book with Penguin Press on amusing and interesting English vocabulary?

      www.thewonderofwhiffling.com

      with best wishes

      Adam Jacot de Boinod

      (author of The Meaning of Tingo)

      (www.themeaningoftingo.com)

      adamjacot@fastmail.co.uk

    • gozergirl profile image

      gozergirl 8 years ago

      What a great lens!

      Had me rolling over laughing, and now I have several more books to add to my must read list!

    • profile image

      anonymous 8 years ago

      haha this was such a fun read. Who knew there were so many bizarre books out there

    • profile image

      Silent_Note 8 years ago

      This is a great lens! You've put together an amazing collection of bizarre books and information. When you get a chance, it'd be great if you would drop by my lens and say hello.

    • profile image

      anonymous 8 years ago

      Eternal Curse on the Reader of These Pages by Manuel Puig.

    • SusannaDuffy profile image

      Susanna Duffy 8 years ago from Melbourne Australia

      In your Bemusing Book Bin, you have 2 wonderful books .. Milton's Teeth and Ovid's Umbrella - Curiouser and Curiouser Adventures in History is a superb little book from a superb lecturer and writer. The second of course, is Do Androids dream of electric sheep ? a classic book, dark and disturbing as it travels through the hidden recesses of the human psyche examining humanity and defining what is human. Thanks for joining the Bookworms group (groups/bookworms)

    • profile image

      poutine 8 years ago

      I didn't know there were so many bizarre books.

    • profile image

      Jason_Wright 8 years ago

      Great lens! You've got a wonderful collection of bizarre books and resources here! I'd love it if you'd stop by my lens and say hello when you get the chance.

    • kephrira lm profile image

      kephrira lm 9 years ago

      Great lens -5 stars.

    • profile image

      anonymous 9 years ago

      Well, the Bible has 'Your breasts are like gazelles'. That's pretty wacky. Feel free to say hi to me at Book Collecting Blog!

    • profile image

      kristinedior 9 years ago

      Wonderful source of Information!

      If You would like to know more about

      Free Books and how to get them, Please Go Here

    • profile image

      anonymous 9 years ago

      Wow, you really did an awesome job on this! I was laughing so hard! My favorite has to be "How to Write a How to Write Book", lol.

      -chelle http://itmightbelove.com

    • profile image

      harry2 9 years ago

      Nice lens, feel free to visit my lens about Audio Books

      Get all the info you need on how to download audio books here.

      Harry Rackers

    • profile image

      shiznaught 9 years ago

      I run a similar lens about wierd and bizarre book titles, and I enjoyed reading your list. You sure have some eyebrow raisers on there!

      Feel free to stop by my lens at http://www.squidoo.com/weird-books/

    • Brite-Ideas profile image

      Barbara Tremblay Cipak 10 years ago from Toronto, Canada

      great lens, really original idea on this...loved the phobia's..felt Lucy in "A Charlie Brown Christmas" -nearly did a backflip, lol..

      Barb