leaves me breathless.
where you used to reside
make me feel homeless
everything and nothing
all of the spaces in between
what we used to feel
what we feel now
what i yearn for
and what i no longer can accept
and flood me with the knowledge
no longer is your absence OK
no longer can i be denied your scent
my mind flushes with vivid images of you.
the smell of your exhale as you sleep
the way you'd trace my shape with your eyes
as you would whisper to me
that you were going to be different
i want all of you
because your ugly
is as precious to me
as your beauty.
i speak to you silently at night
even though you aren't there
and fill your silence
with everything you've ever said to me
when all is quiet
at the moment in between wake and sleep
i can hear your heavy breaths
and it sooths me.