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i drew you in...

Updated on September 23, 2010

you'll never know

what you mean to me.

i drew you in

sitting here

looking out my window

longing

longing for midnight

longing for a kiss in the dark

i thought of you

thought of you for years

and then

you appeared

its not like i can say

i didnt mean to fall in love with you

because i already was.

i welcomed it

like warm sun on my face

like cool crisp autumn night air

but i ruined it.

in trying not to hurt someone

i hurt everyone

and im sorry.

but now i am stuck

all i wanted

all i ever wanted

was to be me again

to give myself to someone

who would actually give back to me

and i had it

i had it and now its gone

i went to the gravard tonight

i layed myself out

and just breathed.

in

out

in

out

your absence

was palpable

no voice

no touch

only your song

on my earbuds

only your memory

falling inside of my tears

my fantasy

became reality

and washed away

like so many written word in sand

when the tide rises

hearts etched out with sticks

only to be devoured

by the massive ocean

a shaddow over my soul

no moonlight

at least none that i can see

even the stars seemed dim

its pathetic

me writing this now

but i dont care

i dont care if you think its dumb

i dont care if you hate me

i still feel the same

that will never change

i just wish you werent completely gone.

i suffer.

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    • the pink umbrella profile imageAUTHOR

      the pink umbrella 

      6 years ago from the darkened forest deep within me.

      midnight has a huge significance for me. lol, no no one ive ever been with is a vamp. I did have a short lived romance that was very vampirical though. i come alive at night in a way, much more than in the daylight. im less stressed for some reason. idk, dark and cool and shaddowded. everytthings better at midnight. sex, movies, walks... u get me lol.

    • Angela Brummer profile image

      Angela Brummer 

      6 years ago from Lincoln, Nebraska

      Very beautiful and mysterious! Does midnight have a sugnificance... are you or your love vamps? Loved it! Voted up up up!

    • BeyondMax profile image

      BeyondMax 

      6 years ago from Sydney, Australia

      Painful but yet so deliciously beautiful, I love it, I feel it. Thank you!

    • the pink umbrella profile imageAUTHOR

      the pink umbrella 

      6 years ago from the darkened forest deep within me.

      ddgteytrdtrtyu- wtf?

    • profile image

      ddgteytrdtrtyu 

      6 years ago

      llllll

    • Cagsil profile image

      Cagsil 

      7 years ago from USA or America

      If I was in a frisky mood, I would wonder if that was a bonafide offer? :P (see I'm sticking mine out too) :P

    • the pink umbrella profile imageAUTHOR

      the pink umbrella 

      7 years ago from the darkened forest deep within me.

      im sticking my tongue out at you, lol.

    • Cagsil profile image

      Cagsil 

      7 years ago from USA or America

      Yes, it's always easy to say, but half the time it is never easy to do. :P

    • the pink umbrella profile imageAUTHOR

      the pink umbrella 

      7 years ago from the darkened forest deep within me.

      just go to bed huh? easy for you to say. seems as though my body refuses to shut down until almost 4 am every day now.

    • Cagsil profile image

      Cagsil 

      7 years ago from USA or America

      I see I found one I missed. LOL! However, I am sure there are others as well. I've had this feeling a couple of times in my life and it sucks. I've written a couple of poems about the ladies who had the effects. As always, it's interesting to read you and see how you express yourself. Btw- if you're tired then go to bed. :P Thank you for sharing. :)

    • the pink umbrella profile imageAUTHOR

      the pink umbrella 

      7 years ago from the darkened forest deep within me.

      seicheprey- isnt it funny how some things we read can move us so much that we lose all sense of our ability to express how we feel about it? lol. im not saying thats what happened when you read this, but beautiful is what i respond to people when i read something they wrote and cant begin to tell them how it affected me. im rambling...so tired! thank you for reading more of me, and thank you for commenting.

    • seicheprey profile image

      seicheprey 

      7 years ago

      Simply put: beautiful.

    • profile image

      Johnny Love 

      7 years ago

      To feel this sorrow brings pleasure to my pain. A journey to nothing found in the emptiness left inside of me. I could cry if I had the tears left to bleed, but as I stand alone tonight I realize that what you lost, is just like what I gave away. So beautiful your paintings are. UP and oh so beautiful.

      J Love

    • JayDeck profile image

      JayDeck 

      8 years ago from New Jersey

      I sent an e-mail.

      -J

      and now i am off to read another....

    • the pink umbrella profile imageAUTHOR

      the pink umbrella 

      8 years ago from the darkened forest deep within me.

      if I write another message tonight?

      you are the one my dear chancing to read what you know will only draw you in for more!!! please read my newest...its not like my others and its new territory for me.

    • JayDeck profile image

      JayDeck 

      8 years ago from New Jersey

      I could literally read you all night and keep coming up with stuff i love about your poems. There are some wonderful concepts and ideas in here that had me thinking.

      However, If i write you another message tonight I'm going to apply for the restraining order myself.

      Keep writing!

      -J

    • puresilence profile image

      puresilence 

      8 years ago from New Delhi

      An Exquisite.. though little disappointing in last, where it seems love is something more like an obsession. Anyway impeccable and delicately written.

    • Sa`ge profile image

      Sa`ge 

      8 years ago from Barefoot Island

      wait for no one, the sun shines for you, take the day and do something with it for someone without wanting anything back. Run out to help, to do, to play, give your love to the day, to the night, to the old lady down the street, the kid who lost a toy. someone who truly needs you, someone you don't need but can do for. That love, that feeling will never hurt you, it will grow with you. Bless you! You are a good writer, that you are~ ~Aloha~

    • the pink umbrella profile imageAUTHOR

      the pink umbrella 

      8 years ago from the darkened forest deep within me.

      Micky Dee- yea.

    • profile image

      8 years ago

      Still here. Still watching. Still waiting.

    • Micky Dee profile image

      Micky Dee 

      8 years ago

      "i just wish you weren't completely gone" That's right! Thank you Ma'am. Very nice.

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