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If I Get Married - Poem

Updated on June 19, 2018
Gloriousconfusion profile image

I started writing poetry as a child. I write performance poetry, observational, sometimes humorous, sometimes serious human rights issues

I've Been Writing Poetry Nearly All my Life

I remember when I was about ten, my friend and I wrote a rhyming play - yes, a whole play, would you believe? Of course it was quite a short one-act affair, but we memorized the words, set up the stage (in the garden) and dressed up in the right clothes.

The audience consisted of our family - who else?

We were mortified when they threw in a few cheeky comments and laughed in the wrong place, but they made up for it by clapping and cheering at the end. I was encouraged enough to perform many times after that, and even tried stand-up comedy, but I found my "talent" was of most benefit to me when delivering an oration in court as an advocate, some thirty years later.

You never know when your early experiences are going to come in handy.

Wedding Bouquet


Royal Weddings

Well, William and Catherine's royal wedding has been and gone a few years ago, Edward and Meghan's more recently, and now there are no more fancy weddings on the horizon.

In spite of protestations to the contrary, they still seemed to me to be pretty luxurious affairs. But what do I know?

Every maiden fantasizes about her wedding.

Here's my wedding fantasy, in poetic form - a stupendous affair with opulence and romance beyond compare.

My real wedding, by the way, was a bit different!

But who wants reality when you can choose romance?

Here's my Poem - "If I Get Married"

(I should be so lucky!)

If I Get Married

The wedding will be so exclusive

that even the bridegroom won't know where it is.

My dress will be opulent silk

delivered personally by an unsmiling Mandarin

from the nether regions of Outer Mongolia,

borne in an intricately carved jade coffer

(like a posh coffin, but easier to carry)

with ornate Chinese lions guarding each corner.

Flowers will be flown in

from the botanical gardens in Rondebosch

and Balchik in Bulgaria.

The Salute will come from a thousand and one Kalashnikovs

Imported from the hills of Tora Bora.

There will be no present list at Harrods

Because, at the age of eighty-eight,

I don't need anything really.

©Diana Grant 26th September 2008

Here's a Quiz About Marriage

view quiz statistics

© 2010 Diana Grant


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