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Losing Someone I Never Really Had

Updated on January 5, 2016

MAYBE, it was the sound of his melodious voice,

That keeps echoing inside my head,

Or his whimsical ways of making fun,

Of just about anything in grace.

MAYBE, it was his soulful eyes,

That means more than I can interpret,

Or about his untold agony,

That I have been wanting to mend.

MAYBE, it was his relentless faith,

That calls me for a second look,

Or that an impossible wish to have his heart a captive,

But he might not be able to get off & to get unhook.

MAYBE, it was his unspoken sensitivity,

That is not skin-deep for me to easily see,

Or what seems to be his arrogant remark,

Was an awkward conversation-starter for us to be.

MAYBE, it was just my persistent series of dreams,

Of him that wakes me up each night,

I see myself crying helplessly,

Under the question of what is right.

YOU have brought me back to my knees,

Praying back to Him & begging,

That these feelings can release me,

Because I know you are “Love”,

That I won’t ever be able to call mine.


Love is holding someone else’s hand,

Love is caring someone else’s heart,

Love is caged because of someone else’s love.


Let me protect myself from getting hurt,

Of not measuring up to any of your fantasies,

And of not being the kind of Love you want to see in Me.


Let me care for you in sheer friendship,

That though, I can’t have you,

I can still be a part of your life story.


Let me continue praying for you,

That she can give the love I wanted to give,

That she can live in your life where I wanted to be.


Allow me to marry rhymes with reasons,

In the worlds I create in words,

Until we can finally call each other Home.


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    • profile image

      muhraddhi 4 years ago

      i can relate to your poem. i have been admiring this girl for such a long time. i can only look at her at a distance. i wanted to be her friend but she seems too snobbish to let me in.

    • profile image

      chito gallardo 4 years ago

      That's true. How sure are you - that he will not leave your friend as well if he also find another one better than her after a while? If he or she can leave somebody that easy for someone he "thinks" is better off, how sure are you that he or she would not do the same to yu. I had someone who gave up in our relationship just because I did not fit her standards and her demands. Until now, she is still single and jumping from one relationship to the other.

    • AngelicaHementera profile image

      Angelica Ebarvia Hementera 4 years ago from Philippines

      Hello there Clueless One. I am sorry that you feel sad about this. My friend and the guy are currently in a relationship, though. Both of them have partners of their own. A woman or a man after God's own heart would not have any intention to hurt anyone. If they really do not feel loved in their own respective partners, jumping from one relationship to another is not a good move, though. Each of them must fill up their own "love tanks" by loving themselves more or else, this will be a cycle that goes on - just because they felt empty or they needed more attention. We love not because we are alone but because we have more than enough love for ourselves that we are capable to share to other people. At the end, it is not about who is in a relationship or who isn't - who is married or who isn't - this is about who from those can sustain their love for each other in a LOOOONNNNGGG permanent time despite the shortcomings of their partners.

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      Clueless One 4 years ago

      :'( This is sad. Maybe yur friend and the guy feels the same way. If that is true love, either of them shud break the ice, take risk & fine love in each othr's arms.

    • AngelicaHementera profile image

      Angelica Ebarvia Hementera 4 years ago from Philippines

      Thank you Torpedo. I hope I moved you in a good way. Yes, I will keep on writing using the little time I have. :)

    • profile image

      torpedo 4 years ago

      Nice! This moved me. Keep writing angelica..