The streets were cold and damp; people were celebrating without understanding or reason. I had reason not to be celebrating! I could feel the anger building deep inside me, burning deep in my heart and mind. I keep thinking about his words, how they cut me to the quick. To imagine the audacity to make an comment of that magnitude, and in front of everyone like that. How could he have said those things? He should have known, he saw what I did for him, I would have stood in front of anyone in his defense; even die for him. I wiped the sweat off my brow with the back of my hand. I’m feeling tired and empty. Maybe I should get something to eat; I hardly ate anything back there. After what happened in the park…well, I guess I don’t really have an appetite after all.
It was a long way from there and, running away the way I did, it didn’t do me any good. I would laugh but, frankly, I don’t feel like it. Running like that took a lot out of me. But what else could I do? I tried to stop what was happening, but how could I? They might have thought it more of an atonement to repute his unfounded statements? Even when we went to the park I tried to convince him. Everyone believed the worst. I saw the look in their eyes; they all believed his words as truth. My friend, my best friend, and after all we’ve been through!
I continued walking down the narrow alley. It was the best way to go; I didn’t want to see anyone. I just wanted to be alone right now. The breeze was chilling me to the bone and I left my coat at the tavern. Getting all hot and sweaty like that, I might catch my death. Ha! What do I care? That might be the best thing that could happen! Maybe I should just crawl in a hole somewhere and die, would anyone miss me. I suppose if I had stayed there, the way they were looking at me after he said what he said; I bet they wouldn’t have missed me with anything they could throw at me! I thought they were my friends, but they looked at me like I was a stranger. I wish I could put it all behind me, all of it behind me. I scuffed my feet in the sand and gravel, stubbing my toe on a stone. I felt it begin to throb. I kept moving; my mind is spinning. I feel so perplexed. What can I do, how will I face everyone again?
Thunder was rumbling off in the distance, it might start raining again. Was I feeling sorry for myself, was this some kind of self pity? No; no it wasn’t’ I‘m right to feel this way. I’ll show him who’s right and who’s not! After all who does he think he is, Ha! I guess I know the answer to that!
Wow; listen to me, reacting this way. What’s gotten into me? He’s my friend, my best friend! And we have been through a lot! I wonder what he’s thinking now. He’s all alone I should be with him! Maybe after things cool down a bit and get back to normal. Hopefully he’ll be back in the morning; we can talk about it then. They had no right to take him! What’s he done to anyone? It’s really getting cold now. I see a fire up ahead, perhaps they won’t mind if I warm myself up a bit.
“You guys mind if I stand by your fire?”
“Sure come on over,” one of them replied. I walked up and lifted my hands in front of me letting the warmth work on them. “Hey,” one of the strangers was looking at me. Yea?
“Don’t I know you? You were with those guys earlier this afternoon.”
“No I don’t think so, I’m not from here.”
“Sure yea I know you, you were with that bunch with that other guy down by the clearing!”
“No,” I laughed shaking my head, “you have me confused with someone else.”
Then a big burley guy spoke up, ”I saw you there as well, you were with them and you there standing right beside him too!”
Now they were all looking at me, this fire wasn’t big enough for all of us…I needed to move on. But first, ”No you’re wrong. I wasn’t there I don’t know him!” then I heard it, like a knife cutting straight threw my heart the sound of that rooster almost knocking me off my feet. I ran away as hard and as fast as I could. Finally I collapsed burying my face in my hands sobbing heavily, “He was right, every word…, how did he know? ………….Just like he said,…………………….. how could I bear this? the shame ………………………..…I did just what he said I would, I betraed him……… somehow he knew