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Hundreds of Butterflies. Chapter II
The day I found out I was pregnant was the most horrifying of my life. For a couple of weeks I had been feeling nauseated, vomiting at random intervals and my breasts had been sore, I had hidden it from my parents because I feared the worst.
That morning, after kneeling at the toilet bowl vomiting for ten strait minutes, I splashed my face with cold water and hurriedly threw on my school uniform.
I was pale and the dark blue of my Oriel High blazer did noting but wash me out. It was late October, the strong wind and heavy rain that day made me feel a little better, so I folded my umbrella and slowed my pace, turning my face to the sky and letting the rain pour down onto my skin.
I got to school, and as soon as I entered the building the hot stale air of the from the central heating and the putrid smell of cafeteria food and stale sweat immediately hit me and made me almost vomit again. I forced myself to keep it down, and walked as fast as I could to registration.
As I entered the room I saw three of my friends; Jodie, Claire and Pippa sat around our table, chattering amongst themselves. The moment they saw me they began to hoot:
"Rebekah, Rebekah! Claire's going out with Matthew McMinn!" Pippa shouted, a huge grin across her face. Claire in turn punched Pippa on the arm, "I am not!" she exclaimed, blushing, "He's giving me a lift to Shelly's Halloween party on Saturday, with three other people!" They continued to argue amongst themselves while I slumped down on my chair and sat in silence, looking increasingly pale and sick.
Jodie lay a hand on my arm "Are you alright Becca?" She asked, concerned. I shook my head slowly.
"What's wrong" asked Pippa.
"I need to skive a couple of lessons after registration to go into town." I whispered.
"Cool!" Smiled Claire, who never needed an excuse to play truant.
"Sure, but why?" Jodie asked.
"I need to buy something, it's important!"
My friends began chattering and arguing again all at once, what did I need to buy so urgently? Why couldn't it wait until after school? What was going on?
"Shut up!" I yelled, at which my friends, and the rest of the class all stopped and stared.
"Look!" I whispered, leaning forward so my friends would be the only ones to hear. "I have to go into town after registration to buy something important! If you don't want to come then I'll go by myself, but I would appreciate your support, I'll explain everything later."
So twenty minutes later, we ducked carefully out of the school grounds and walked into town.
"When are you going to tell us what you need to buy that's so important?" Asked Claire.
"A pregnancy test..." I answered quietly, staring at me feet as I walked along. My friends stopped in their tracks and stood silently for a moment, gaping open mouthed at me. Then it came, choruses of: "Oh my God! Your pregnant! What are you going to do?" Echoed from their mouths.
"Look!" I barked, irritated, "I don't know if I'm pregnant, but I might be! So I'm going to buy a test. And I don't know what I'll do if I am pregnant, but I'll figure it out when I know for sure. I probably won't be though! I'm sure I've just got a bug or a hangover or something!"
When we eventually reached the pharmacy, I managed to persuade Pippa to go in for me, she begrudgingly agreed when I told her she could spend the change on herself, and I handed her the twenty pound note that I'd stolen from my dad's wallet that morning. Jodie joked that we should save the change for alcohol, in case the result was positive, and we all laughed rather uncomfortably.
Ten minuets later Pippa emerged from the pharmacy, carrying a bag containing a relatively good looking brand of pregnancy test, and ten pounds worth of cheap makeup and jewelry. Together we walked into the toilets of the County Mall, and I hurriedly opened the pregnancy testing kit and emptied the contents into the sink. I carefully read the instructions, and didn't understand a single word. They may have been written in another language. I read it again, as slowly as possible, I understood the individual words, but put together, and as nervous as I was, I just couldn't concentrate enough to make sense of them. So I gave up and passed them to Pippa, she read through them and explained that I had to take of the cap off the stick, pee onto the little felty bit, replace the cap and wait for three minutes. After three minuets I had to look at the panel, if there was one blue line then I wasn't pregnant, but if there were two then I was.
I took a deep breath and carried that little white stick into the cubicle, I placed it carefully on to the back of the toilet while I pulled my skirt up and my knickers down. As I sat on the seat, feeling very vulnerable, I worried for a second that I wouldn't be able to pee. Instead it happened so fast I wasn't expecting it, and I had to rip the cap off the test as quickly as I could, and stick it through my legs into the flow of urine. As I did so, some urine splashed on to my hand, and for some reason it made me want to cry.
I replaced the cap onto the test and sorted myself out, when I came out of the cubicle, my friends were stood directly opposite waiting for me.
"Time three minutes." I mumbled as I walked slowly to the sink to wash my hands. The next three minutes felt like hours. We didn't speak, not one of us had any idea of what to say, we just stood in pensive silence, occasionally glancing nervously at each other. I couldn't bear to watch the panel, so I passed it to Pippa, she quickly shoved it at Claire, like it was an active grenade. Claire then passed it quickly to Jodie, who gave her a rueful glance and placed it carefully on the side of the sink. We stood in silence, staring at the pregnancy test as if we were hostages and it was our captor.
When Jodie's watch beeped, telling me that my three minute warning was up, I nearly jumped out of my skin. I stared at my friends, who looked back with a mixture of concern for me, and relief that this wasn't happening to them.
I sighed, and being careful not to accidentally see the result before I was ready, I picked up the test and held it in my hand. I took a deep breath and, still believing deep down that I couldn't possibly be pregnant, I looked at the panel.
As I looked down at those two blue lines my heart stopped.
"I'm pregnant." I bleated, so feebly I hardly heard myself. Pippa looked over my shoulder at the test in my hand. "Oh my God!" She exclaimed, then turning to the others she breathed "she's pregnant!"
I couldn't see my friends, but I could feel the shock on their faces. "Here," said Jodie, nudging me. I turned around, Jodie was holding out a mars bar. "I got it for you from the pharmacy, just in case" she smiled reassuringly.
I ran passed her into the cubicle, and threw up violently into the toilet.