Maybe The Next President Will Not Be Ponjuble.
Created October 3, 2014
I was eating pancakes when a falling star hit me like a ton of bricks. I woke up to find myself on mom's kitchen floor with a foreign person picking up star fragments off the cranium of my head . He said his name was Ponjuble .
I said," who are you friend ?" He said," I am Ponjuble the third. I am the fine son of Ponjuble Junior, and the grandson of the great Ponjuble the elder of the fantastic Ponjuble family."
I said ,"well what do you know, I would never have imagined , and event like this would ever happen in my boring existence, or a person like you would just show up from nowhere , or a falling star would almost do me ultimate harm."
Ponjuble said, " Well you know how it is according to physics. Anything can happen pal ."
" I will be the next President of You're United States of America , " said Ponjuble.
I responded by saying ", the only way you might be elected president is if you are a citizen of the U.S.A."
I said, " You must have a clean record , and be of age".
"You should at least be a senator, or a governor".
Ponjuble replied, " where have you been ? I am a senator of planet Padukey , and I am a citizen of Kansa, and I personally knew Dorothy, the tin man, the scare crow, the lion, and Todo who all knew my friend the Wizard of Oz, and the electoral college said it was O.K. with them if I run, and I am way over twenty one, and I saved you're life from a falling star."
I said, that's nice that you saved my life, but you need the help of the internet.
Ponjuble said, " I know little about the internet you little discouraging punk ? "
"You want to be president, and you do not have a computer, or have people who can work on you're campaign, and you do not have support from a party ?"
" Abraham Lincoln did not have everything either ", said Ponjuble.
I said," give it a try. I'll vote for you if you can answer some stuff."
Ponjuble said, " go right ahead buddy boy."
I said , can you be a little bit more friendly, and have a better attitude without talking smarty britches, and by referring to me as something other than a punk ? Can you do that ? Well is it in you're nature to be at least polite.? You were doing great until you revealed the dark nature of you're soul. People who would choose to vote for you would have to trust you with deadly Nuclear weapons, so you need to get you're atitude together you stinker ?"
Ponjuble said, " I do not think that would be a big deal . Are all presidents nice. Is being nice a prerequisite ?"
I said," it sure as hell is a prerequisite when you need to show the rest of the world that you can conduct you're self in a civilized manner without making fellow world leaders sore as hell because of a stupid attitude."
I said," well go ahead, and try it, and run if you can take the heat. If you can not, then you may as well not run at all . In any case you are still brave, for saving me from a falling star that could have left me with permanent brain damage."
"Thank you Ponjuble for saving my life. The Medal of Valor belongs to you , right beside my pancakes. I was eating them because my mama made them fresh, and just right for me".
"You are welcome to sit down, and have some pancakes with me with light syrup which has less sugar, and less calories. You are my friend, and I may, or may not vote for you, if you promise not to act too large for you're panty hose".
I said," and you need to say hello to my mama."
Ponjuble said, " good morning Mr.s who ever you are."
"I was shocked the way he addressed my mama. I would never vote for a stinker like this, even if he saved my life. I appreciate what he did by saving my life, but even though he was a kind of a friend, I did not like the way he spoke to my mama. Wars have been started by less."
My mama said, "even though he saved you're life, I want his ass out of my kitchen pronto because no body talks to me like that."
I said," O.K. mama I will tell him to leave, and to never come back."
I told Ponjuble to leave.
"Thanks a lot you ungrateful Americans," said Ponjuble.