Moving Back in With Your Parents
A How To
You may have to endure being called a "boomerang kid" or perhaps you don't mention that you are 30 and had to move back home due to last months lay-off, but the truth is there are more of us in the same situation than we would like to admit. So how do we cope?
It is easier than it may seem. You need to balance self-pride, motivation and your ability to engage with family members. Let me explain...when taking the plunge to move back home you had to peel back a layer of pride. You needed assistance and had to ask for it, that bruises the ego, but don't worry! Remind yourself this is TEMPORARY. This is where our second word comes in, while living under a parental units roof you have to be motivated in order to secure a future outside of it. And lastly, you have to interact. This will probably be the most challenging, because while pride is a feeling that some can bury inside and the want of something better is a good motivator, having to sit with Timmy at the dinner table might not be your cup of tea.
Here are some tips for ensuring that you don't argue with Auntie Mae:
- Have a sit down dinner once a week so you can touch base with your whole family
- Make one-on-one time daily with individual family members, doesn't have to last long, it's about quality not quantity
- Help around the house: load the dishwasher, do your own laundry, vacuum
That was for them, so what about you?
- Make a weekly list of five things that make you happy, to keep you positive
- If you are out of work, apply for a job daily
- Put on your makeup (if applicable), shine your shoes, put product in your hair - continue doing the things that make you feel good about your appearance even if you are staying in. The more you feel good on the outside the more likely you are to be motivated to get a job, prepare for work the next day, look for an apartment, etc.
Don't be afraid of people's opinions, they have them, so do you. Be upbeat when discussing the transition, "My parents were kind enough to let me move in with them, so I can save up for the place I really want." Contemplate the reason for moving back in, was it an error on your part due to a misuse of funds? Can you remedy the situation on your own or should you get budgeting advice? Did you recently get divorced and need support until you can venture out on your own again? Did you decide to make a big change and quit your job, but need assistance until you can fully stand on your own two feet? None of these should make you feel less than the person you were before. I won't hinder you from being self-deprecating when you aren't accomplishing anything to get out of your current situation and leap out of the nest again.
Remembering why you are having to live with your parents will help the nagging feeling that you are letting yourself down in some way. The most important thing during this time in your life is to stay motivated and keep working towards your end result - a place to call your own.