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Duct Tape Delights

Updated on January 15, 2013

Duct Tape Delights, Ditties & Diversions

This light-hearted lens is devoted to the handyman's helpful friend in a pinch, "duct tape" or as it is also known, "duck tape".

On the other hand, for those who haven't a clue how to use a hammer, wrench, or saw -- duct tape comes in designer shades suitable for creating funky fashions without the need for needle, thread, or a sewing machine.

And, for those who are all thumbs and full of artful amusement, duct tape certainly comes in handy to restrain flapping gums and loose lips of all sorts. Long Live Duck Tape!!!


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HERE BE DRAGONS! - So stick to the program and grab some duct tape!

The Dim-Witted Duct-Tape Dragon breathed a puff of smoke and a sigh of relief, he had finally found a home among the pesky plants and weird garden gnomes.


Image Credit: Posted on July 28, 2010 in

SOME THINGS DEFY EXPLANATION ... - So tell me again how you fix a black hole?


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Who says handymen don't know how to woo a wicked wench or a dazzling dragon? - Slay them both with flowers ...preferably Duct Tape Roses!

DUCT & COVER - When all else fails, this is a guy's best answer to everything!


Image Credit: Ron Leishman illustrator at

WELCOME TO WEIRD NEWS OF THE WEEK: - A tantalizing tale of toaster-duct-tape ...


Image Credit: Lisa Swerling & Ralph Lazar - Vimrod cartoon -

DUCK TAPE - Recommended by Quacks Everywhere!

The universal fix-it kit,

A multipurpose tool;

Silver silly sticky stuff

All wrapped upon a spool.

Put together anything.

Patch your tennis shoes.

Seal up a cracked and leaky pipe.

Attach the part that's loose.

And though it can look ugly,

With a little luck,

No one will ever notice

That you taped it with a duck.


Image & Poetry Credit: from "Punnies" photostream on, by Lynn Hunter, Bobcat Publishing

The Best Unintential Use of Duct Tape? - Or, how to zip your lip with a bit of zest & zing!

The Devil Only Knows What To Do With Duct Tape...15 More Strange Uses To Amaze You!

1. To stick a term paper with far too many dangling modifiers and fragmented sentences back together again (what do you mean it doesn't deserve a silver star?)

2. To remove lint from clothes or possibly other cuddly creatures (just kidding).

3. To catch flies (especially when a jar of honey is so darned expensive these days).

4. To make a waterproof tent for mosquitoes (yup, they deserve protection...look what happened to the dodo bird)

5. To attach your rug or toupee in a pinch (after all, who carries a pot of glue around with them anyway)

6. Makes a great space suit to scare away the aliens, (what do you mean you don't have any aliens, what planet are you from?)

7. To repair a fish-tank (but watch out those pesky piranhas can eat their way through anything)

8. To hide naughty words on tacky t-shirts (although the only people who won't be impressed are blind fools)

9. To fix a hole in a backyard bouncy castle (200-pound gorillas will love your for it!)

10. Designer duct tape works wonders as a nail polish substitute (cougars and tigers won't be able to keep their paws off you)


Image Credit: bcanada92 at



I have to say that my world is gray,

not because of compromises made

or morals in the shade,

but because of a sticky tape

and the way it takes shape.

There are so many uses

and not many abuses

of this great sticky mess

the component of my dress...

Ode to duct tape, my best friend;

Ode to duct tape,

may the gray never end.


Source: Poem written by Melody Williams, Greers Ferry, Arkansas - The Weird Hobby Hall of Fame

Dazzling Designer Duct Tape?

Yup, Designer Duct Tape comes in handy when you're scratching your head trying to figure out what to wear to your prom, Funky Friday Fashion Day, or Horrid Halloween.


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How's the duct tapeworm bait working out for you?


Image Credit: G. Bowen at

What does a handyman do with half a hammer?

Forget "Crazy Glue" or "Silly Putty"! There's a more invisible, reliable, and stronger solution!

Duct Tape dudes have worked night and day to come up with a fast and affordable way to repair a broken hammer -- transparent tape!

Hapless and helpless handypersons the world over are now recommending that Duct Tape manufacturers offer a whole new range of uses for this practical product:

-- to seal perennial problems (like how to cost-effectively fill gaping holes in government bugets)

-- to mend broken or bleeding hearts (happy-impaired people are not good for the economy)

-- to stretch the truth (silver-tongued folk find that its shiny smooth surface helps things slip off the tongue easily)


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DUCK TAPE TO THE RESCUE? - Duct Tape Ditties That May Tickle Your Fancy

Magnetism is one of the Six Fundamental Forces of the Universe, with the other five being Gravity, Duct Tape, Whining, Remote Control, and The Force That Pulls Dogs Toward The Groins Of Strangers. -- Dave Barry

One only needs two tools in life: WD-40 to make things go, and duct tape to make them stop. -- G. Weilacher

Next to a dog, man's best friend is duct tape. -- Anonymous

But just now, he'd gotten on his knees and proposed marriage, like in a television commercial for a diamond ring. Except of course they had the roll of duct tape instead, which, when you came to think about it, was a far more practical item. Such a bad mistake it would be, to embark on marriage and adult life without a nice supply of duct tape. -- Nancy Werlin (Impossible)

Can duct tape mend a broken heart?

A Ripsnorting Repairman Speaks:


Which tape on ducts?

Duct tape on ducts!

It makes good sense:

Duct tape on ducts.

Should we use duct tape on ducts?

A rig we built to quickly test,

Which kind of seal would be the best.

First cold & hot then hot and cold,

Soon we'd make the sealants old.

Blow hot & cold; blow cold and hot,

Most seals did work, but duct tape not!

The cloth will hold; the goo will stick,

Until the heat makes duct tape slip.

We should not use duct tape on ducts.

We should not use it; 'twon't stay stuck.

Oh! Duct tape you like, so you say.

Use it, Use it. Find a way.

Use it, Find a way, I say!

Can we use it on a mouse?

Can we use it in the house?

Can we use it here or there?

Can we use it anywhere?

You can use it on a mouse.

You can use it in the house.

You can use it here and there!

You can use it ('most) anywhere.

To close a jar or tie a goat.

To fix a car or patch a boat.

To seal a box or in a train

You may use it, that is plain

For all such use, duct tape is great,

But for one we hesitate.

You should not use duct tape on ducts.

You should not use it; 'twon't stay stuck!


Poetry Credit: Max Sherman, 1998

Image Credit: Dennis Cox illustrator at

Dauntless Defender of Quality Duct Tape

What is Bud Man's favorite fix-it project?

See results


Duct tape pop cans to yourself (in rows of course) to look like a colorful human vending machine.

Wear something pink or minty green, Duck tape a shoe to your head, and go as "Used Bubble Gum."

Duct tape yourself sticky-side-out and stick popcorn and candy wrappers all over your body - you can go trick or treating as the floor of a movie theatre!

Duck tape over your puffy down ski jacket and go as a baked potato! (Don't forget the dollop of sour cream on your head - created, of course, with white Duck tape.)

Black pants and a black turtle neck with white duck tape "bones" makes a quick and easy skeleton costume. Or, use silver duck tape to make a "Terminator" skeleton.

Duct tape your head (sticky-side-out) and roll in freshly mowed grass: Presto! You're a Chia Pet!

Duck tape mirrors all over yourself. (You will either look like The Invisible Man or like everyone else at the party).

Duck Tape Biker: Cover your pants and jacket in black Duck tape. Duck tape a set of handlebars into your hands and your "Ol' Lady" to your back. Then add a black or brown Duck tape toupee or "rug" (complete with "duck tail" flip in the back) for that greased-back biker hair look.


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DUCT TAPE TO THE RESCUE! - Created by the Grinning Goblin

Duct Tape Ornament
Duct Tape Ornament

Let's face it, what the happy holidays be without a genuine duct tape Christmas tree ornament?

Duck Tape ~ Cedar T-Shirt Medium
Duck Tape ~ Cedar T-Shirt Medium

Just what every Duct Tape dude needs to perform little miracles with the help of some mending tape.

Man's Duct Tape Tie / Necktie, for Mr. Fix-it, Diy Man, Novelty Gag Gift by Plug
Man's Duct Tape Tie / Necktie, for Mr. Fix-it, Diy Man, Novelty Gag Gift by Plug

The perfect present for a fashionable Mr. Fix-It (especially when you don't have time to make it yourself!

101 Female Uses for Pink Duct Tape
101 Female Uses for Pink Duct Tape

Who says Duct Tape is only for dudes...why not dazzling dames too?


What Do Foxes, Kids, and Canines Have in Common? - They Don't Like To Be Fenced In!

Whoever said "idle hands are the devil's workshop", never said you can't use duct tape to write a silly sentence!


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Santa did not take pity on this pathetic soul. - Frankly, anyone who hasn't learned the art of Christmas gift wrapping with duct tape doesn't deserve any presen


Ductigami: The Art of the Tape
Ductigami: The Art of the Tape

The perfect gift for those who are bored with navel gazing, twiddling their thumbs, and wiggling their ears!

The Jumbo Duct Tape Book
The Jumbo Duct Tape Book

No handyperson should be without this marvellous make-over manual!

Got Tape?: Roll Out the Fun With Duct Tape!
Got Tape?: Roll Out the Fun With Duct Tape!

A great way to learn how to make wallets, hula skirts, tiaras, sandals, belts and even clothing from handy dandy Duct Tape!

Yankee Magazine's Vinegar, Duct Tape, Milk Jugs & More
Yankee Magazine's Vinegar, Duct Tape, Milk Jugs & More

For those who want to brings things back to life in a creative way!

Don't Forget the Duct Tape Tips and Tricks for Repairing Outdoor Gear
Don't Forget the Duct Tape Tips and Tricks for Repairing Outdoor Gear

Duct tape to the rescue -- yup, it'll fit in your backpack along with a role of tape!

Duck Brand 280110 Printed Duct Tape, Zig-Zag Zebra, 1.88 Inches x 10 Yards, Single Roll
Duck Brand 280110 Printed Duct Tape, Zig-Zag Zebra, 1.88 Inches x 10 Yards, Single Roll

Yup, there's a zig-zag zebra project lurking about somewhere in your mind.

Scotch Duct Tape, Love Note, 1.88 Inch x 10 Yards
Scotch Duct Tape, Love Note, 1.88 Inch x 10 Yards

Whoa, what a find -- "Love Note" duct tape!

Duck Brand 1398228 Printed Duct Tape, Cosmic Tie Dye, 1.88 Inches x 10 Yards, Single Roll
Duck Brand 1398228 Printed Duct Tape, Cosmic Tie Dye, 1.88 Inches x 10 Yards, Single Roll

Now here's one very psychodelic tie-dye tape to create your next cosmic critter.


DUCT TAPE DELIGHTS -- Do's and Don'ts - So, when was the last time you did anything creative with duct tape? Surely you have a story about duct tape...why not s

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    • FunkyJewelleryUK profile image

      FunkyJewelleryUK 6 years ago

      Brilliant lens. Very imaginative and funny! :D

    • Deano1979 profile image

      Deano1979 6 years ago

      Love the lens and love duct tape


      Car Body Repair

    • Sami4u LM profile image

      Sami4u LM 7 years ago


      Red Green would be proud :) Blessed

    • profile image

      ShamanicShift 7 years ago

      This is a fine lens about one of my favorite topics -- the wonders and delights of duct-tape!