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Rude, Funny & Animal Themed Doormats

Updated on September 18, 2014

The place to find your perfect doormat!

Are you looking for a funny doormat that matches your personality? Need a great gift for a housewarming? These doormats are not only hilarious, they're totally functional. Why not give your guests a chuckle as they wait for you to answer the door? After all life is too short for a serious "Welcome" mat!

Go for something that is funny, or even look for something that will chase away those unwanted guests. There is no wrong answer when looking for the perfect doormat!

Well Butter My Butt & Call Me a Biscuit Look Who's Here Doormat


Nothing says welcome like a doormat that talks about Butter And your Butt, win, win combo there! Even city folk will appreciate the down home vibe from this doormat.

Go Away! Funny Door Mat

Sweet Home Go Away Doormat

It's simple, it's stylish & it displays your inner hatred for drop by guests...Go Away!

Please Stay on the Mat Funny Entry Mat

"Please Stay On Mat. Your visit is very important to us. Your knock will be answered in the order in which it was received."

Truly my fave, I even own this one! it has a clear easy to follow message that even the vacuum salesmen can follow.

Welcome Just Don't Expect Much

Welcome - Just Don't Expect Much. Basically how I feel whenever anyone comes to my house. Might as well lay it all out there right upfront!

Looking for a decorative doormat with a little attitude? Tired of boring old doormats? Then take a look at the funny doormat collection from High Cotton. This Fun & Functional Howdy Doormat is 18" x 27", made of Olefin Indoor/Outdoor carpet with perfect bound stitched edges, and printed with color fast ink. Care is simple, Just wash with hose and brush. Do Not machine wash.

How do you like your doormats?

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Welcome, when you're here, you're family ... Doormat

Welcome, when you're here, you're family. Sure you still want in?

Nice, classy & even throws in a tiny warning. This one is great for those friendly folk I hear about that actually want visitors...crazy.

Hi I'm Mat Funny Doormat

Hi. I'm Mat

Meet Mat, he's kind of a doormat but is dealing with it. He's very straight forward & a simple kind of guy. But he really lets people walk all over him. It's sad really, poor guy has no spine....no literally, he has no spine at all. He's just a doormat.

Hair Of The Dog Doormat

Hair Of The Dog?

Help yourself it's all over the house.

You should expect a nose to the crotch at this house too! But seriously it is the dogs house so if you have a dog hair problem don't go in his house!

Ask Not For Whom the Dog Barks Doormat

Ask Not for Whom The Dog Barks.

It Barks for thee.

It's classy yet still funny & pet related. Seems like the perfect doormat to me!

This fun & functional doormat is 18" x 27", made of Olefin Indoor/Outdoor carpet with perfect bound stitched edges, and printed with color fast ink. Care is simple, Just wash with hose and brush. Do Not machine wash.

Come in. Relax. Take your top off. Doormat

Come In Relax Take Your Top Off Doormat

What more can you ask for, it's friendly, involves beer & makes a topless comment! great for dorms, apartments, or anyplace that is beer friendly...like a bar!

Welcome Goodbye Doormat


It's two doormats in one! The Welcome Goodbye Doormat says hello on the way in and goodbye on the way out, making your doormat space always useful and revolving. What else can you ask for from a funny doormat. A perfect home decor gag gift! The Welcome Goodbye Doormat is a high quality doormat, not just a flimsy little regular old one. # Welcome Goodbye Doormat measures: 18" by 30" (3/4 in. thickness) # Made from all-natural coconut fiber which is an excellent dirt-trapper; # This mat is stenciled with permanent fade resistant dyes.Toss the Old Welcome Mat in the Trash

The Cat Day 751 Funny Doormat

"The Cat, Day 751: My captors continue to torment me with bizarre dangling objects. They eat lavish meals in my presence while I am forced to subsist on dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope is eventual escape...that, and the satisfaction I get from occasionally ruining some piece of furniture. I fear I may be going insane."

This fun & functional doormat is 18" x 27", made of Olefin Indoor/Outdoor carpet with perfect bound stitched edges, and printed with color fast ink. Care is simple, Just wash with hose and brush. Do Not machine wash.

Beat it, Hippie. Doormat

Beat it, Hippie. Doormat
Beat it, Hippie. Doormat

Beat it, Hippie. Doormat

Just in case you you have a hippie outbreak in your area.

My two favorite things are guns and sleeping late ... Doormat


My two favorite things are guns and sleeping late ... This funny doormat will keep your early morning visitors at bay or at least let them know you have a sense of humor....or a gun and a temper.

Beware Dog Can't Hold it's Licker Doormat

Beware:

Dog Can't Hold it's Licker.

This fun & functional doormat is 18" x 27", made of Olefin Indoor/Outdoor carpet with perfect bound stitched edges, and printed with color fast ink. Care is simple, Just wash with hose and brush. Do Not machine wash.

Come Back with a Warrant Doormat


Nothing says i hate people like a come back with a warrant doormat...Imagine how funny it would be if the cops actually HAVE a warrant! No really, we respect cops and that wouldn't be funny at all. Unless it was the neighbors house, then it would be really funny.

Beer gets you in the door. Doormat


What a nice way to beg for beer!

WOW! Nice Underwear Doormat


This fun & functional doormat is 18" x 27", made of Olefin Indoor/Outdoor carpet with perfect bound stitched edges, and printed with color fast ink. Care is simple, Just wash with hose and brush. Do Not machine wash. This hilarious doormat is a perfect gift.

Enter At Your Own Risk Coir Doormat

Enter At Your Own Risk Coir Doormat

This beautifully designed hand-woven doormat will enhance your entry way or patio. It's made from the highest quality all natural coconut fiber, which is an excellent dirt-trapper. This mat is hand stenciled with permanent fade-resistant dyes. Size: 3/4" thickness 18 in x 30 in.

Wrong Address Doormat

Wrong Address Doormat

Because you want to stay under the radar!

Our Dog is Not a Biter Doormat

Dogs A Humper Doormat

This fun & functional doormat is 18" x 27", made of Olefin Indoor/Outdoor carpet with perfect bound stitched edges, and printed with color fast ink. Care is simple, Just wash with hose and brush. Do Not machine wash.

We're So Excited To See You Pet Doormat

We're Excited To See You Doormat

This Fun & Functional We're So Excited To See You is 18" x 27", made of Olefin Indoor/Outdoor carpet with perfect bound stitched edges, and printed with color fast ink. Care is simple, Just wash with hose and brush. Do Not machine wash.

Doormat reads: We're so excited to see you we don't know whether to pee on the floor or tear up the couch!

To Fish, Or Not to Fish? Doormat

To Fish Or Not To Fish, What a stupid question.

This fun & functional doormat is 18" x 27", made of Olefin Indoor/Outdoor carpet with perfect bound stitched edges, and printed with color fast ink. Care is simple, Just wash with hose and brush. Do Not machine wash.

Doormat - Don't Make Me Come Out There - Dog

Don't Make Me Come Out There. -Dog

Our Fun & Functional doormats are 18" x 27", made from 100% Olefin indoor / outdoor carpet with perfect bound stitched edges. Care is simple, just wash with a hose and brush. Do not machine wash, Dry flat.

A Fragile Dog Doormat

A fragile and very sensitive big ass dog lives here.

Probably best not to ring the doorbell then.

I Golf Therefore I Am Not Here Doormat

I Golf, Therefore I Am Not Here

This fun & functional doormat is 18" x 27", made of Olefin Indoor/Outdoor carpet with perfect bound stitched edges, and printed with color fast ink. Care is simple, Just wash with hose and brush. Do Not machine wash.

Howdy! - Let me know what you think....

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    • Susan300 profile image

      Susan300 3 years ago

      Lots of funnies, but the 'cone' one made me actually LOL! :)

    • Adventuretravels profile image

      Giovanna Sanguinetti 3 years ago from London UK

      What a laugh - fantastic lens. Thanks for sharing.

    • serendipity831 profile image

      Drake McSherry 3 years ago from Milwaukee, WI

      This was great, I needed a laugh!

    • CrossCreations profile image

      Carolan Ross 3 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      LOVE these funny doormats! One of my favorites was not here though, and would make a good addition. "We serve only the finest California wines. Did you bring any?" HEHEHE!

    • profile image

      tonyleather 3 years ago

      Wonderful selection of comical doormats!

    • kju385 profile image

      kju385 3 years ago

      Great selection, now I'm seriously considering of ordering one of those funny ones for my home :D

    • profile image

      TanoCalvenoa 3 years ago

      Another vote for the "Please Stay on the Mat" as best one on the page.

    • profile image

      umbrella-bagger 4 years ago

      I love the "Please Stay on the Mat" door mat. So funny.

    • NatureFan LM profile image

      NatureFan LM 4 years ago

      I laughed out loud several time while reading this. This was great. :)

    • steadytracker lm profile image

      steadytracker lm 4 years ago

      Wow, these are some really great door mats. Some of them are quite funny too. Thank you for taking the time to share them with us.

    • ghoststorylover profile image

      ghoststorylover 4 years ago

      I just love these! I think my favorite is the "butter my butt and call me a biscuit" one! lmao!!

    • manicnymph profile image

      manicnymph 4 years ago

      There are so many good ones it's hard to make a choice! Thanks for the laugh!

    • tok2gman profile image

      tok2gman 4 years ago

      Nice lens. Funny too. Thanks.

    • suepogson profile image

      suepogson 4 years ago

      Very funny. "It's all fun and games until someone ends up in a cone' Is hysterical. ye s- I have dogs. Thanks for the laugh

    • profile image

      SteveKaye 4 years ago

      Great fun. Thank you for publishing this lens. I needed a good distraction.

    • junkcat profile image

      junkcat 4 years ago

      There are some very cute door mats have to get one.

    • profile image

      cmadden 4 years ago

      Some very funny ones here! Cat Day 751 and the crazy cat lady one are especially appropriate....

    • profile image

      anonymous 4 years ago

      Really nice selection, I am really considering the "say no to pot" one

    • profile image

      AlleyCatLane 4 years ago

      I love these! I especially like the cat day 751.

    • FancyThatUK profile image

      FancyThatUK 4 years ago

      I love the Warning: Dog has no respect for personal space! That is brilliant!! My parents totally need that

    • sudokunut profile image

      Mark Falco 4 years ago from Reno, Nevada

      Thanks for the laughs! A couple of those cat ones would be highly appropriate for my house...especially the one about maiming guests lol (he's not as cute as he looks and many have found that out a little too late!)

    • profile image

      john9229 4 years ago

      So many choices! Nice Animal Themed Doormats

    • SandyMertens profile image

      Sandy Mertens 4 years ago from Frozen Tundra

      These gave me a good laugh today.

    • weirdproduct profile image

      weirdproduct 4 years ago

      These are all funny, but my favorite one is "Go Away". It is just si simplistic and to the point. Love it!

    • profile image

      robbieshaws 4 years ago

      one doesn't have to be an animal lover in order to enjoy the humor in this lens. thanks for sharing

    • kerilovesadeal profile image

      kerilovesadeal 4 years ago

      The "Please Stay on the Mat Funny Doormat" really had me laughing. Now, if only you could get that as a door bell ring... Interesting, huh? :) Great lens! :D

    • profile image

      anonymous 4 years ago

      I want a "The Neighbors Have Better Stuff" doormat!

    • LiliLove profile image

      LiliLove 4 years ago

      These are awesome!

    • scrapquilter profile image

      Myreda Johnson 4 years ago from Ohio USA

      These are great. It would be hard to choose.

    • profile image

      anonymous 4 years ago

      Fantastic selection !!!Could do with one of each - and change it according to my mood !

    • leesholden profile image

      Lee 4 years ago from Derbyshire, UK

      Lol, I honestly didn't realise there were so many novelty mats out there! Some are great!

    • Joan Haines profile image

      Joan Haines 4 years ago

      I'm getting the "Hi. I'm Mat." mat. Perfect.

    • ismeedee profile image

      ismeedee 4 years ago

      These are so fantastic!!! I've never actually seen these before; I'd have trouble choosing between several of them! They'd make quite a fun and quirky present too!!

    • profile image

      David-N 4 years ago

      I love the dachshund one because he certainly is!

    • profile image

      fionaagee42 4 years ago

      I love no shoes doormat :)

    • profile image

      anonymous 4 years ago

      Hehehe, nice lens - so many funny doormats ideas. Beat it hippie is still my favorite, really great lens

    • profile image

      tudorose 4 years ago

      Really entertaining. Thank you.

    • CrossCreations profile image

      Carolan Ross 4 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      Funny doormats make the best housewarming gifts. One of my favorites says "We serve only the best California wine. Did you bring any?"

    • spids1 profile image

      spids1 4 years ago

      Great lens very well written.

    • Essentially Ind profile image

      Essentially Ind 5 years ago

      These are really cool...............:)

    • profile image

      einsteinmoomjy 5 years ago

      A couple of winers live here. Love it!

    • CanvasArtPrint LM profile image

      CanvasArtPrint LM 5 years ago

      So many great ideas, thanks!

    • profile image

      TheCoolStuffHQ 5 years ago

      Awesome funny stuff !

    • MrAdvice LM profile image

      MrAdvice LM 5 years ago

      Great idea for a lens. It says something when you make it the whole way through

    • LouJon profile image

      LouJon 5 years ago

      Haha, some really funny mats here, my favourite has to be the "reminder - do not jump on the nice people" mat....Great lens :)

    • profile image

      CristianStan 5 years ago

      Who said that funny stuffs can only be printed on tshirts? We can also make cook stuffs in doormats that could make every visitor smile before they come in and as they left.

    • SpenceG profile image

      SpenceG 5 years ago

      I like this one, "My Bite Is Worse Than My Bark Doormat." But in reality, it's the opposite for our dog.

    • ResearchAddict profile image

      ResearchAddict 5 years ago

      These are really funny. I especially love "A couple of winers live here"!

    • BestMusicGear profile image

      BestMusicGear 5 years ago

      Very funny stuff!

    • winter aconite profile image

      winter aconite 5 years ago

      Love this lens!!!!!

    • profile image

      BestLaminateInc1 5 years ago

      What a great ideas! Funny and creative- love it !!!

    • hntrssthmpsn profile image

      hntrssthmpsn 5 years ago

      Some of these are hilarious! The "Hair of the Dog" door mat would be great to put out the day after a party, when there are the inevitable quick visits from guests who left some item behind when they went home. Great collection!

    • menskincaretips profile image

      menskincaretips 5 years ago

      Hilarious! I never thought a doormat could be so funny! I definitely have to get one, the finish line doormat is my favorite. Awesome lens!

    • profile image

      nicole-young 5 years ago

      funny mats. I like this lens a lot. : )

    • steph-naylor profile image

      steph-naylor 5 years ago

      Great Lens! I'm actually crying with laughter! Thanks ever so much! Im definitely going to recommend your Lens to my friends!

    • profile image

      kmyangel 5 years ago

      Wipe Feet To Continue mat is very funny :))

    • profile image

      crstnblue 5 years ago

      Very nice lens and collection of doormats! Lots of smiles!

    • SellClean profile image

      SellClean 5 years ago

      Great collection! Thanks for sharing.

    • gatornic15 profile image

      gatornic15 5 years ago

      Great selection of doormats!

    • futurefocus57 profile image

      futurefocus57 5 years ago

      "I tend to let people walk all over me"...Mat

    • profile image

      faber80 5 years ago

      lovely doormats!

    • profile image

      mywyomingadventure 5 years ago

      These are too funny!

    • makemoneyonline5 profile image

      makemoneyonline5 5 years ago

      Love the door mats. What a clever idea for a lens!

    • Heidi Vincent profile image

      Heidi Vincent 5 years ago from GRENADA

      Really nice and FUNNY!

    • MrsZ LM profile image

      MrsZ LM 5 years ago

      Who knew there were so many clever door mats out there...my fave...the 'butter my butt' doormat...seriously funny!!

    • bossypants profile image

      bossypants 5 years ago from America's Dairyland

      You've found some very funny doormats! Everyone should read this lens first thing in the morning and start the day with a smile! Hope I'm not the only squidlike you get for Lumpy Rug Day!

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Lovely lens.. :)

    • PippiDust profile image

      PippiDust 5 years ago

      Great doormats and a lot of new ideas.

    • goo2eyes lm profile image

      goo2eyes lm 5 years ago

      blessings and congratulations for winning the purple star. thank you for sharing. i submitted this lens as my rug quest.

    • Country-Sunshine profile image

      Country Sunshine 5 years ago from Texas

      Lots of fun! I like your collection!

    • OUTFOXprevention1 profile image

      OUTFOXprevention1 5 years ago

      Funny lens! I need a few of these!

    • profile image

      glutenallergy 5 years ago

      We've actually got the "Cat, Day 751..." doormat, and I'm amused by the reactions whenever someone takes the time to read it. There are some great doormats here!

    • AustriaChick profile image

      AustriaChick 5 years ago

      Fun lens ... loved it!

    • karMALZEKE profile image

      karMALZEKE 5 years ago

      Nice selection

    • MarilynThompson profile image

      Marilyn Thompson 5 years ago from Washington State

      Funny!So many would be appropriate

    • ogrote profile image

      ogrote 5 years ago

      Every doormat has a story!

    • profile image

      aussieremovals 5 years ago

      Really very funny quotes on the doormat... I really enjoyed it...

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      I think its funny that your rude and funny doormats lens is a solid tier 1 lens. Hey, its all good, and cool what people like! :D

    • profile image

      Ladyeaglefeather 5 years ago

      What a great fun lens

    • siobhanryan profile image

      siobhanryan 5 years ago

      Has to be (Don't make me come out there Dog). Very good.

    • profile image

      gravityx9 5 years ago

      lol!!! what a fun lens! PINNED!

    • CarpetCleaningG profile image

      CarpetCleaningG 5 years ago

      Haha, these are great, I've never seen these before. Very good. Last one I saw was years ago "Bone appetite" for a dog

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      I'm looking for a doormat I saw once that says, "Protected by Smith and Wesson"

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      I'm looking for the mat that says, Cover me, I'm goin' in.

    • PapaKork profile image

      PapaKork 5 years ago

      This is great! I never knew there were so many choices in doormats, this is all new to me, love it!

    • BobZau profile image

      Bob Zau 5 years ago

      Very clever niche to write about, well done.

    • WriterJanis2 profile image

      WriterJanis2 5 years ago

      Very fun ideas.

    • profile image

      DesignZeal 5 years ago

      These are really hilarious! I'm still laughing over the "Beat it, hippie" one - the very thought of the look on my in-laws' faces if they were greeted with that doormat makes me want to laugh out loud :)

    • profile image

      jimmyworldstar 5 years ago

      The go away one is pretty hilarious, as is the please stay on the mat one. I wonder how many people would actually leave or stay because of the impression they got from the mat.

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Hilarious! "Butter My Butt & Call Me a Biscuit" is my favorite but they are all great.

    • profile image

      seosmm 5 years ago

      Very nice lens!

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Nice lens thanks for sharing. Squid-liked

    • NorDac LM profile image

      NorDac LM 5 years ago

      Nice collectionSquid Angel Blessed

    • profile image

      baincol 5 years ago

      I never knew there were so many doormats for sale, very funny.

    • Showpup LM profile image

      Showpup LM 5 years ago

      LOVE these doormats. Fun.

    • privresearch profile image

      privresearch 5 years ago

      I love the funny doormats :)

    • CrossCreations profile image

      Carolan Ross 5 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      Oh these ARE very funny doormats! I saw one somewhere that said..."We serve only the finest french wines. Did you bring any?" Nice selection here, Miz Groovy Finds.

    • modernchakra profile image

      modernchakra 5 years ago

      Hilarious and a great idea of lens! I don't have a funny mat but I do have one that is a Iran, a gift from my Aunt's house, that is definitely too fancy for a doormat, but it is lovely and worth the use! These are funny though.. hmmm I know where I am coming when it is time for a change. Nice work!

    • ForestBear LM profile image

      ForestBear LM 5 years ago

      ha ha, great selection you have featured here. Thumbs up

    • yourselfempowered profile image

      Odille Rault 5 years ago from Gloucester

      Oh, these are Fabulous! I love them - I didn't know there were so many funny doormats! I can't choose between them there are so many fun ones! I think I'd need to have a few and change them around! :)