Military Gnomes To Protect Your Garden!
Does your garden need gnome protection?
I purchased a USAF (United States Air Force) military garden gnome for my father as a birthday present. You can see that very cute guy taking a break from his gnome duties to the left. He is a swinging gnome.
My retired military father's hobby is "decorating" his back yard using a patriotic theme. His flamboyant and eclectic style infuriates his neighbors and my step-mom. The more they complain, however, the more stuff he adds to the red, white and blue landscape design. This year I am helping him annoy the golfers, neighbors and his loved ones by giving him a cute little Air Force Gnome. It is the perfect gift for a retired military man. (Later that same year, I got him a University of Alabama gnome. At least is is red and fits the color scheme.)
FYI: There are garden gnomes for all the military servicemen out there! If you have not guessed by now, I am going to share them with you on this page (or "lens", as we here at Squidoo, like to call our pages). I am focusing in on just the military gnomes; none of those other cute garden gnomes will do. Yes, I want you to buy a gnome!
Image credit: Mickie_G - all rights reserved (Yes, I caught the garden gnome taking a break with my iPhone. Red Lettering added to the image with www.BeFunky.com.)
Protect Your Gnome!
The gnome I bought for my father was placed outside and the paint did not hold up well.
If your gnome is going in the garden, protect it with a clear, weather-proof finish.
If you feel like you want to be prepared for a gnome war, click on the title above so you can order your survival guide today. If you live anywhere near my father, I have a feeling that the gnome battles will begin when the Air Force Gnome is at his battle station. I can just see it now, Army, Navy and Marine Gnomes battling it out for supremacy!
Don't Gknow What a Gnome Is?
A gnome (or nohm) is a dwarflike creature found in European lore. Gnomes look like small, misshaped men who have very long beards. They usually live underground (think mines), but today they love to find a space in your garden among the plants. In lore, gnomes are thought to to guard fabulous treasures of jewels and precious metals. One thing I did not gknow about gnomes is that they were thought to have the magic ability to make people feel sad. How could they do that? They tend to make me smile, but I guess my father's neighbors feel sad when they see his collection!
I found this information about gnomes in my own very old encyclopedia (World Book).
Find the top rated gnomes on Amazon by clicking Top Reviewed Gnomes
Find Your United States Air Force Gnome on Amazon
This little Airman is 11.5 inches high and will fit nicely in your garden, gazebo or front porch. Each fella is hand crafted and hand painted. The gnome hat has a raised logo on the hat.
Unfortunately, not made in the USA.
Tip: The gnomes do not hold up well outdoors. I would protect them by spraying or painting them with a clear varnish.
Buy a Navy Gnome for your protection!
Gnome from the Navy! Bet you could add a fleet of gnomes around your pool.
Don't forget that there is a Coast Guard! - A Gnome Ready to Protect the seashore!
An oft forgotten military gnome. He will protect the Great Lakes and the coast.
Don't fogey to give this little fella a coat of protection (a clear, waterproof spay will do nicely).
Army Gnomes on Amazon
It has been my experience that the Marine gnome loves to sneak in. Beware, the Marines just might win the battle for your garden.
Marine Gnomes need a hiding place in your landscape!
Marines! Need another Gnome source? - try eBay for your garden protection
Amazon does not sell everything all the time. eBay is a good alternative and you get competitive pricing, too.
Buy your Gnome on eBay!
WHAT TO EXPECT FROM YOUR GARDEN GNOME:
At first your garden gnome may be a little shy. He may even hide from you... Given time, your gnome will adjust and come out and watch over your gnomescape. Gnomes love to help small animals and even feed some of them from seeds found in the garden (make sure to tell him not to take seeds you have planted!) Sometimes at night you have to be extra careful with the Party type Gnomes (Being a military brat, myself, I KNOW that the military does party hardy). They sometime drink a wee to much and may fall into your pond. Be sure to have your ear out for distress calls or make sure you buy a Coast Guard Gnome to put by the pond. Hmmm, wonder if there is a "lifeguard gnome"?
Thanks to rhandy99 on eBay for the inspiration.
Learn About the Enemy Gnome: - The "G" is as silent as the gnomes' attack.
All nations agree, the way to win a war is to understand the history of your enemy. The book here has received 5 stars (the best) from reviews on Amazon. Read and learn about gnomes so you can figure out how to keep them out of your yard. Like the "G" in gnome, those nomes will be silent in their attack on your countryside manor. They will appear overnight like mushrooms.
"The book ends with a view of garden gnomes' affect on modern pop culture, with a mention of the trend in gnome liberation (stealing and relocating the ornaments as a prank)." From a review by From a Andrew J. Broznya on Amazon.
Another way to protect yourself: - A Gnome to Support the Troops--the safest side!
In the military gnome affairs, you can protect yourself with a generic gnome that supports all the troops.
Did you gno it? It is not too late to help protect your garden all year long with the addition of your own military guards. Which branch of the service to you tend to like the best? My loyalty lies with the USAF.