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Five Ways to Keep Your Husband Coming Back For More

Updated on September 24, 2008
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Sunshine is a wife, mother of four, a relationship expert, a journalist, a photographer, a public speaker, and author.


Listen up, ladies! It's time to stop complaining about your husbands and start looking at yourselves. Marriages are like plants, and without any food, they will wither away and die. How do you keep him coming home to you? Easy, be his girlfriend. How do you do that? Here are five easy ways to reel him back in instantly.

  1. Find out what he wants to do-make him feel like the focus is on him for a while. Does he like to go to the drag races? Make it a date. Does he like to fish? Pack some wine and head out to the nearest pond.
  2. Flirt-I know you did it before you were married. Sure, things change, kids are hectic, but bring a little spark back. Look at him with deep flirty bedroom eyes. Spend some time near him. Touch his hand when you speak to him. Tell him how much you love him, and why. Use words to express how proud you are of what a great provider he is for his family.
  3. Be his girlfriend-women spend so much time worrying that their husbands will have a girlfriend somewhere else, but the truth is, if you are his girlfriend, he won't want another one! Be sexy, be fun, be spontaneous. Remember the good-ole-days! Giggle, make passes, and leave sexy voicemails on his phone while he's at work.
  4. Buy something sexy-so what, your hips spread, and you aren't what you used to be. Your husband still sees what you were and always will be to him. You don't have to become a stripper, but buy some pretty lingerie and surprise him with it. Remember the sexually favors you used to get from him? They will reappear if he feels your sexual energy focus on him again.
  5. Get a room!-Find a sitter, and surprise him with a hotel room, even if you can't spend the whole night. Decorate with candles and buy some flavored body oils. Surprise him with sexy lingerie. All bets are off when you don't have to worry about waking up the kids. Explore his body like you did as newlyweds, and make him feel like everything you do is for him.

It takes a strong man to support a family, but it takes a woman, who is willing to set her selfishness aside and show him that he's doing a good job, to hold a marriage together. Repeat these things over and over, and before you know it, they will become habit, and your marriage will thrive.


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      ashley 7 years ago

      I think it all depends on a man. Sexy outfits and love notes wont keep a dog off the streets. They are however good tools to keep a good man happy and having fun guessing what's next. My husband is a good man and even though neither one of us are perfect we have fun keeping eachother happy. And he is home with me every night and even sneaks home from work when he's on lunch at least a few times every week if not every day!

    • radgirl profile image

      radgirl 8 years ago from Somewhere in outer space

      Screaming-My first question for you would be do you have kiddos? If not, realize that you may never change him, and consider the fact that you may have chosen the wrong man. If you do have kiddos, the only thing that will save your marriage is if he seeks help and is serious about getting it. I am so sorry to hear that you have a man stuck in this rut. It is not normal. It is not okay.

      Did you know he was addicted to porn before you married him?

      Watch the movie 'Fireproof' together if you can get him to sit through it. It has been known to "click" something in a lot of husbands and get them on the right path.

      This is not your fault, and you didn't cause it. Keep your chin up. I hope he finds his way, because it's pretty schmucky of an addiction.

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      screaming 8 years ago

      buying something sexy, doing what he wants to do isnt for the man thats never satisfied. theres always more...what do you do when they are addicted to porn(admits but believes in normal) or wants more then you can give?

    • radgirl profile image

      radgirl 9 years ago from Somewhere in outer space

      Ash, if you work to be your husband's girlfriend, he will take interest. It doesn't matter what man it is, if he feels important, and his manhood isn't threatened, he will be the husband you want him to be.

      It takes time, and you have to be patient, but think about it. Does a man want to be around a woman who is always threatening his masculenity, saying negative things, or not showing any interest in him at all? What about a man whose wife gets up in the morning, does her make up and hair, always flirts with him, always acts a little bit sexy for him, leaves little love notes in his lunches, and tells him how important he is, and that he is the backbone of his family?

      A man who feels like that, and has that wife will treat her like a queen.

      BUT, it doesn't happen over night. YOU have to be the example, and when he realizes how wonderful things are, he will go out of his way to suprize you with flowers, romance you, and make you feel like the most important and amazing woman in the world.

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      ash 9 years ago

      it really depends on the husband you have.i have expreinced very few men takes interst in theri wives ,the keep girlfriends no matter how faithful u are with them.

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      Sad Wife 9 years ago

      I have done all of it - sexy notes, lingerie, flirting, romantic and sexy dates, even some pretty risque stuff (like public sex) - and he still goes and blows all our money on strippers and "massages". This stuff really only works on good men, not my husband!