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Groupie Love

Updated on June 15, 2008

The Craziest Form of Expression

Music, the universal language that the musician presents to the world. Their passions, dreams, loves, desires, hopes and fears conveyed through the instruments that they play. We show our love for the musician with cd purchases, t-shirts, posters and other trinkets we may run across. We attend concerts, tune in to our local radio shows and broadcasts, and new cd release parties in hopes of meeting our artist and expressing our hearfelt gratitude for showering the world with their song. For some, these chance encounters are lasting moments we share fondly with family and friends. Those meetings leave an indelible impression upon our minds, that we reflect upon for time to come. For others these meetings symbolize a way to gain noteriety if the encounter involves sex, money, gifts or even long lasting communications with the artist. However, for some artists these are mere chance encounters that result in satiating desires. For the fan, these encounters lead to misunderstandings, because the starstruck does not realize that they suited a need for the moment. This misunderstanding results in heartbreaks and for some of the most extreme cases a restraining order because the fan had resorted to stalking their obsession.

According to the dictionary this fan could be classified as a groupie:

1. a young person, esp a teenage girl, who is an ardent admirer of rock musicians and may follow them on tour.

2. an ardent fan of a celebrity or particular activity

I have had the opportunity to view first-hand the antics of the love-lorn that attaches itself to the artist like a parasite, the infestation too much for even a vaccine. Sounds dramatic I know, but working with Independent Artists, I have witnessed sheer psychotic behavior from adoring fans. According to the dictionary the groupie is a "young" person. What concerns me is someone in their late 30s and 40s traipsing about the nation for the love of someone because of their profession and status.

There are women that completely lose their sense of self because they want the love of their obsession. I have watched one that completely invalidates her children because she would rather sit under her "star" and have her world crumble right beneath her feet. Just for the sake of saying she had him for the night. True stories, sad situations and people.

Let's talk about the one that insinuated herself into the artist's life under the guise of helping him with his business. Her days are filled with running away other groupies because she fears her "spot" in this man's life will be taken away from her. He doesn't realize that her intentions are not about helping him, but rather acquiring him. She does everything under the sun for him, yet balks at the sight of other women he flaunts before her. In his eyes, they are merely friends, and she is just there helping him. In her eyes, he is completely disrespecting her and she won't tolerate it.

I would like to say that she could be the most dangerous to this man because she could snap in any instant if her livlihood with this man is threatened. He doesn't see that, yet, he doesn't realize that for every woman that he sleeps with he is sending mixed signals because afterwards he complains that they are all too clingy. He wants the ability to have what he wants, without the attachments. Every woman he chooses to be with suits a purpose with him. They fill a void in his life. He runs when things get too deep, and his lack of focus on his music alone is enough to make you step back off of the payroll.

It's like a comedy of errors. These women hang on to his every word. Each one cooking, cleaning, paying his bills and meeting his every need and desire. Older women who for some reason or another need to have someone else validate their existence in life. A musician can make them happy. This is what is discussed amongst them. His skills and abilities could make them happy. I scoff at the comments, because when he sends them on their ways they are like hurt children, waiting by the phone for his next call.

There is one that literally stalks him. In person, online you name it. She looks at his MySpace page daily, and even stalks the other women that makes comments to him. She literally spends innumerous hours each day trying to get closer to this man. When he finally tired of her, she immediately went into denial and appeared at his doorstep every chance she could. She even told him that if he stopped communicating with her she would kill herself.

Now that woman has the potential to be VERY dangerous because it could result in fatal attraction. She has small children at home that she uses to get closer to him. Because she knows he loves children, they are like props, just a way to gain his attention.

At concerts it is fun to just stand on the sidelines, because the show before the concert and after the concert is quite entertaining. The women will even attach themselves to the people working in the "camp" to get closer to their obsession. Personally for myself, I normally have to filter innumerous emails and phone calls from these women because they are merely trying to get closer to their target. I gave up on friend requests in MySpace just for that fact alone...

I love music just as much as anyone. I support Independent Artists and Musicians alike. There is a fine line between obsession and appreciation.

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