The Dilemma of a Creative Soul
My need for independence and adventure was a personal trait that has been ingrained in my identity since I can remember. I was always a spontaneous child, involved in creative games with my childhood friends- climbing trees and throwing pranks on unsuspecting classmates. I was able to sustain my craving for adventure by moving frequently during my childhood and teen days due to my dad’s job relocations. I went from school to school, always the new kid, and always being thrown into a culture-shock, that, through imagination and escape, became almost a means of figuring out a puzzle. Once I did manage to do that, I slowly built a skill for understanding a place, its people, its cultural particularities in the scope of the other places I’ve known; it is almost second nature for me to pick up on subtle cultural nuances and make up my mind about the social patterns of any one place. My experience has made me an outsider wherever I go, albeit a very welcome one these days (since my adaptability comes in handy). My international identity further made it possible for me to be adventures and feel affinity towards many places. Maybe instability is all I’ve known, and that’s why I crave it. But, it must also be a personal trait to desire to explore the unexplored, the unusual, the esoteric…to live and experience “magic.”
The Nomadic Way of Life. Are all creative souls nomads at some point in their lives?
Many, many times I have had an internal conflict as to why I can’t just get a job that pays well, that I so-so like, stay at it for a number of years, save up and then go from there. The truth is, whenever I was in such a position, I felt a void- that something was missing and that staying would mean not living, being stuck in a safety-zone, subduing my soul…and ultimately not being true to myself. I didn’t understand why I was feeling this way, since most people do exactly that (and I admire it profoundly, for they are the ones that reap the fruits of whatever stability brings). Maybe “a job” is enough for many…and many times I’ve wished it was enough for me. I just knew there are so many things I’m good at doing, so many new surprises life had to offer, so many life-philosophies to be absorbed. I am even convinced that most people would follow their passions if they had the means, the safety-net if failure occurred, the courage to chase what seems elusive. And I think the fact that I was not tied down by a family/career and am in my 20s that made a big difference in having the will, the means and the possibilities to explore without compromising an already-established life.
I am a creative soul and need to learn to embrace what makes my soul fulfilled (as oppose to feeling somehow "alien" at times) but also need to learn to compromise the constant drive to take off for the more rewarding experience of establishing a network of connections and relationships that will hold long-term importance and priority in enriching my personal life and career. There are people out there just like me. Some are friends, and some are fellow kindred souls online- like Katie Curtin: http://katiecurtin.com/
The dilemma for creative souls lies in the fact that we want to stay true to our hearts (difficult in the corporate-minded mainstream idea of success), but also be well-off financially. Truly, thinking of investing thoroughly in my 401K and having savings down the line is one of my current priorities. So, where is the reconciliation between staying true to one’s nature and still enjoying the financial rewards of a creative career? Does it have to be a struggle between priorities?
To all the creative souls, you are not alone!