ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

This is how we Roll

Updated on June 19, 2012

Uncirculated Bank Roll

Coins fit together nicely into rolls. Banks accumulate rolls of coins and often desire to be rid of them. Rolls are often sorted and packed by machine, meaning that rare coins intermingle with average coins.

Bankers cannot make time in between turning down small business loans to sort through the individual pieces. Their loss could be your gain. Order rolls of coins in sealed paper containers unaudited by human hands. You might just find a college education or a delicious mocha latte buried in there.

Your risk is low. The face value of the coins is usually 1/2 to 1/3 of the purchase price. It's like your birthday except you can't get cake at a bank.

Rock n Roll Shirts

Tuxedos tend to get ruined at rock concerts. Plan to wear expendable T-shirts emblazoned with images of your favorite rockers. Black is a great color because it doesn't show dirt when you get trampled in the mosh pit. Led Zeppelin still sells big, but most people under 50 with discretionary income prefer rock bands not yet qualified for AARP membership.

Is Justin Bieber a rock star? We're not here to judge. A cool hip trendy shirt broadcasting young Justin's face sells like hot cakes at an IHOP. We're here to say we're happy for him. As long as you're buying something, buy this: our economy needs a bump.

Toilet Paper Rolls

Perhaps the most significant application of roll-based technology, this product provides many squares of potential relief. Stock up on it. Should you be sufficiently unfortunate to run out, order larger quantities from online auction sites such as eBay. We're here to help.

You simply cannot have too much. No one ever said to himself "I need to cut back on this incredibly convenient and reliable product." No family ever shattered due an overstock. No friendship has sundered as a result of hoarding it.

Califonia Roll figure FN25A

We have no earthly clue what this is. We watch TV, we listen to NPR, we read online blogs across a wide variety of subjects. Somehow this pop culture contraption has eluded us. Possibly it represents a character originating from a Pokemon episode or an Obama recess appointee.

It looks like fun. it must be fun because it has the word 'Disney' in the title. If we had a few, we'd play with them. We'd give them as gifts and people would like us more. Possibly someone would recognize the thing and tell us what it is. You should order a few and get back to us.

Fishing Line

Without the roll, fishing line would be a rather problematic knot. The fish would have migrated for the Winter before you loaded it into your fishing reel, threaded it through the rod eyelets, tied on a hook, and squished on a nightcrawler.

Truly, the roll plays a huge part in the usefulness of the product. However, once the line has been wrapped around the fishing reel, the original roll has very little to do. It can be recycled or tucked into the bottom of the tackle box, but prospects are bleak moving forward.

Travel Jewelry Roll

Unless you're Kim Kardashian, you can't wear all your jewelry and still expect to be taken seriously. Some of your jewelry needs to be secured in a roll-up travel carrier. This handy device consumes mass quantities of any type of jewelry including costume jewelry and Sears jewelry. No one will know what you're got in there until you unroll it. You are in total control of your inventory.

Jelly Roll

A Jelly Roll makes a perfect desert for any occasion. Ordering deserts online from an auction site such as eBay might at first blush seem hinky, but millions of such products are shipped every day. Probably.

Order extra jelly just in case your rolls arrive deficient. Adding extra filling is always a good thing and will endear you to your dinner guests. A yummy turkey or luscious ham dinner should be topped off by rolled-up jelly. There's always a holiday just around the corner.

Plumber's Teflon Tape Roll

If you don't know what this is, you're not a plumber or you're a plumber in serious denial. Enthusiastic plumbers pack rolls of this stuff into their overalls and hide spare rolls in the glove compartment of their diesel F350. Running out may result in job slowdowns and extra trips to Home Depot.

After reading this composition, you'll probably want to wash your hands. Upon doing so, you will be making use of this product. Don't ask us how: we're not plumbers.

Roll Tide

Living in Alabama and planning to go outside? Wear an Alabama University Roll Tide shirt or hoodie or parka. Everyone will like you. You just might get elected governor.

Alabama Crimson Tide gear comprises about 14.5% of the entire inventory on eBay at any given moment in time. Enthusiastic bidders buy and sell this stuff with the enthusiasm of fans that dislike every other team in the SEC. Look for game-worn football jerseys, Sugar Bowl rings, and used Heisman Trophies up for sale as well.

Conclusion

Roll with it.

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • profile image

      Curious 

      6 years ago

      Why are the other links on this page pointing to toilet paper articles/hubs? Creepy.

    • nicomp profile imageAUTHOR

      nicomp really 

      6 years ago from Ohio, USA

      drbj? Hello?

    • nicomp profile imageAUTHOR

      nicomp really 

      6 years ago from Ohio, USA

      @Robwrite: indeed i am.

    • Robwrite profile image

      Rob 

      6 years ago from Oviedo, FL

      You're on a roll, Nicomp.

      Rob

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)