Hunny, if you were with a real man, you would never ask the internet a question like this.
A man is in charge as soon as he walks into the room and commands your attention. A real man will let his partner know that he intends to love her, and respect her, and treat her as if she's the most prescious gem in his world.
If you have to ask a question like that, then maybe you should be asking yourself a deeper, more meaningful question, like...Why am I with someone who doesn't take charge, and why doesn't he want to take charge of a beautiful woman such as myself?
Hunny, dump him, and find a real man.