11 Exciting, Successful Ways to Catch a Nap in Class

It happens to everyone at one time or another. Falling asleep in class seemingly creeps into your classroom when you least expect it especially when you have partied your brains out the night before and only got an hour's sleep before school and without warning, you are dead to the word. Welcome to "La La Land," my good friend.

You are now completely-defenseless against prankster teachers and other students who have waited for just this moment to make you look foolish and you will have no excuse why you were awakened with a vulgar exclamation. You better think about what I am writing.

Now I do not condone or promote sleeping in class, but honestly, I did my share of nodding-off in my junior and senior year of highs school (1971 - 1972) and now I am reaping the puny harvest of those "z's" I stacked.

I am Serious!

I do NOT condone using these tips to get some sleep in your classrooms. I just wanted to share these with you just in case you were in-need of a good laugh.

Kenneth

Now in my day there were two classes of students: The sharp-thinkers and non-thinkers, especially when it came to sneaking a nap when listening to a lecture given by a teacher with a monotone voice. The non-thinkers would always get nabbed and sent to the principal's office when caught nodding off while the sharp-thinkers had their ways of catching-up on their sleep.
I am not boasting, but of the two groups of thinkers, I was NOT a non-thinker.

And now to unburden myself of this awful secret (of napping in claass) I have been carrying around since May, 1972, when I graduated high school, I want to give you my own personal stash of . . .

11 Exciting, Successful Ways to Catch a Nap in Class

Always Sit Behind a Big Student -- preferably a guy for they won't look back to catch you sleeping, but some girls are born tattle-tales and when a guy falls asleep in class, they have played right into these girls' hands. So make sure the big guy student is big enough to shield you from the teacher and when the time is right, nod right off and please do not snore.

Ask Your Teacher if You Can be Excused -- to visit the boys' or girls' restroom. Then find a vacant stall, sit down and catch a few "z's." But do not sleep your way into a visit to the principal's office. Train yourself to awake in fifteen-minutes as to not get in trouble and it is a medical fact that many times a short nap is as beneficial as eight-hours of sleep in a bed.

Forge Yourself a Medical Excuse -- signed by your mom telling the teachers to not worry if you fall asleep in class. This is all due to the medicines given you by your family doctor to help combat The Rhino Flu.

Time for a Quick Trip to The Library -- if you are groggy from losing sleep while playing cards with your friends the night before. Tell your study hall teacher that you are working on a paper for Science class and you need to visit the library. Then find yourself a quiet, cozy place in amongst the books at the back-end of the library and lean against a wall of books while you doze. To the untrained eye, it will look as if you are reading-up on some famous scientist or explorer.

"Accidentally" Drop Your Book or Pencil -- in the floor. Take your sweet time in picking it up. While you are working to reach your book or pencil, shut those eyes and get yourself a short nap. It will work better than you think.

Pay a Buddy to Get You -- out of this boring class by telling your teacher that he, the buddy, has your study notes for some fake test. And the buddy needs to talk to you about a pressing personal matter. The teacher, if he or she is compassionate, will let you go with your buddy. But that is where it ends. Your buddy goes about his business while you sneak inside the janitor's supply closet and sleep 'til your heart's content. Oh, what about the janitor catching you? No problem. Slip him a few extra bucks to look the other way. He probably needs the money on the meager salary he is paid.

Automotive Sleep -- was not used that much when I was in high school for the simple reason we were afraid that our principal would call the local police to search our cars for those of us who slipped-out of school at morning break and take naps in their vehicles. All you do is have a nice blanket in the backseat of your car and have nerve enough to sneak to your car while your friends are enjoying a snack at morning break and quickly cover yourself with the blanket and nap until time you need to be home.

The Old Headache Gag -- is a sure-fire winner. Wait until the class is underway, then grimace so the teacher can see you. "Avery, what's wrong?" the teacher will normally ask out of real concern. "Oh, well, uhhh, nothing but this splitting headache. Would it be okay to, uhh, put my head down on my desk?" You ask sounding deep in pain. The teacher will admire you for not asking to check-out to head home and allow you this luxury. But you will have to repent for this lie to God to clean it off your "life record" kept in Heaven.

"Accidentally" Fall in The Hall -- and tell a teacher that you need to see the school nurse (if one is available). Tell her that you are suffering from a terrible stomach virus and would she give you something to make you sleep a few moments. Some school nurses are very liberal and will not argue, so get ready to stretch-out on her examination table and sleep like a baby.

My last two tips I know will work. The previous tips, with some work and creativity, will also work, but the two tips below are sheer genius.

Your Gymnasium -- is a literal gold mine of cool places to take a break from your school work and get some needed-sleep. If you have a coach as a physical education teacher, show-up at morning break, and after you have his or her class, and tell this teacher you forgot something in your gym locker. The rest is gravy. Simply wait until your locker room is empty of all people, then slide into your locker and slowly shut the door without making noise. You can sleep until time to go home because the coach only knows that you went in to get something from your locker and for all he or she knows, you are in another class and the rest of the teachers you haven't seen in this day will think you are absent. This is fool-proof. And not for sale to other sleep-deprived students.

The No-Gimmick Sleep Tip -- and use it wisely. With this one, you do not have to sit behind a big student. You can use it anywhere you sit in class. I used it and I had American History immediately after physical education and I was exhausted when I had to listen to my teacher, a Mr. Ruble Shotts, who is now with Jesus. Anyway, I would have my book open and then I would cover my eyes from the side of my head with my hands and doze contently. Ever so often I would move my head just in case Mr. Shotts was suspicious. I tell you this. It worked. Note: I didn't use it too much for Mr. Shotts was a sharp-minded teacher.

Please use these tips with a lot of discretion and care. And now if you will excyse me. "Good night."