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Science : 17 ways to make people like you

Updated on August 14, 2016

How it all begins

1. Copy the other person - this method is called MIRRORING (replication of nonverbal signals subconciously). By emphasizing it, you can make other people like you more. It is also called "chameleon effect" (a study in 1999 by New York University)

2. Spend more time around them - People tend to like things that are familiar (and safe) to them. This effect is called MERE-EXPOSURE EFFECT.

3. Give the other person a compliment - In phycology there is a phenomenon called SPONTANEOUS TRAIT TRANSFERENCE. In this case people tend to memorize the adjectives you use on other people on your own. Next time you say bad about someone else, don't forget that it will also stay with you.

4. Be in a great mood - Emotion can be really contagious. If you are happy when talking to someone, they also will smile more. This research is backed up by Ohio University and the University of Hawaii scientists.

5. Make friends with their friends - TRIADIC CLOSURE is the term used for an effect when people tend to be closer with someone having mutual friends


6. Give positive compliments only occasionally - The GAIN-LOSS THEORY of interpersonal attractiveness says that positive compliments only have effect if you give them occasionally. This research is backed up by University of Minnesota researcher in 1965.

7. Be competent and warm to other - Susan Fiske is a brilliant researcher who suggested the STEREOTYPE CONTENT MODEL meaning that people judge each other based on their competence and warmth towards other people.

8. Reveal some flaws from time to time - Don't give all your secrets away at once. If you reveal your flaws one by one, you make yourself more interesting for a longer period of time. PRATFALL EFFECT says that people tend to like you more if you make a mistake. It sort of is a verification to them that all of us are just humans and make mistakes. No one is perfect.

9. Emphasize your shared values - SIMILARITY-ATTRACTION EFFECT says that people who are similar like each other more.

10. Touch them casually - You only need to touch someone lightly so that they really don't understand it. This is called SUBLIMINAL TOUCHING


11. Smile (alot) - This is pretty obvious that when you smile more, people like you more

12. See the other person how they want to be seen - All humans seek confirmations of our views, whether they are positive or negative by others.This phenomenon is described by SELF-VERIFICATION THEORY.

13. Share a secret with them - A study by Stony Brook University stated that by asking more personal questions, people tend to be closer.

14. Only expect good things from them - Have you ever heard of PYGMALION EFFECT? Harvard University has found out that if you expect a person to be a jerk you will behave to elicit a jerky behaviour from them.

15. Act like you like them - RECIPROCITY OF LIKING is said to be a term used to describe a phenomenon where when you like a person he/she will subconciously like you back.

16. Make a joke occasionally - humor always brings us closer.

17. Listen to them (talk about themselves) - good listeners always make good friends. Harvard researchers have found out that talking about oneself is as rewarding to the brain as is sex, food or money.

Another view of this psychology



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