Always Be The Center of Attention When You Look and Act Like James Coburn
There you are
sitting on a park bench in a mostly-secluded part of the city park. You like it here for there are not many people around. And none of your so-called friends who used to torment you when you attended a high-end party with them. Oh yes, you remember their cruel remarks . . .
- "Where'd you get that suit? You bought it from a bum in an alleyway?
- "Is that you who smells like ruined sardines? Oh, it's your cologne."
- "I would introduce you to my guests, but that would ruin my status."
- "Did you say that "I" invited you to be at this party? I must have been drinking when I said that."
These nasty things are running perpetually in your worn mind. Oh, you tried to fit-in. And you tried so hard to be cool, suave, and debonair. Somehow being the center of attention was not in your genes or maybe it was not of cosmic planning. Frankly, you have grown to resent your birth and entire life thanks to always being put down and shut out of the good life.
I am not
going to ramble on and on about your defeats, losses, and embarrassments. I owe you that much for I have always pulled for "the underdog," but friend, you are no longer an "underdog." You now are going down a new pathway. A new way of living, looking, and really enjoying life. Not to be humorous, but the answer to your social and personal dilemma has been right under your nose all of these years: James Coburn.
In the next few minutes, I am going to point-out the major traits that helped the late Coburn to fame, fortune, and tons of popularity. And my friend, if you simply take some time to memorize the things about him I am writing about, it won't be long until you will enjoy a way of life that most "underdogs" can only dream of.
This process comes in steps
so you can easily follow what I want you to study and memorize. But before you start your work which I confess will be work. There are no easy ways to be like James Coburn. No, sir. But if you have the determination, dedication and willing to sacrifice the time, you can be like this highly-acclaimed actor and enjoy the "fruits of your labor."
James Coburn's style of dress:
- Always formal (whenever possible). Certainly not while grocery shopping, but even with that task, he wore a stylish sweater, a turtleneck, sharp slacks and stylish slippers. Never flip-flops, straw hat or torn shirt he wore in his fraternity at college.
- A necktie or bow-tie when the occasion arose. Coburn fully-believed that looks "do" make the man and what he wore was his own choice. Not some gossip columnist, socialite, or power broker. But his. And he never made any apology for whatever he wore and why. This is crucial. You need to adapt this attitude if you're going to put down that "underdog" image.
- When Coburn entered a room where the party was going on or he was meeting someone for dinner, he never sat in a position to spill food on his clothes. Fact is, spilling food was not in his DNA. Plus he never drew attention to his clothes. That was left to those around him.
Look at the photo above
and notice the smile on James Coburn's face. He was not on the Guest List for this cocktail party. He just remembered, thanks to his amazing memory, that the party host was celebrating a birthday, so he popped-in the party to deliver the host a nice gift.
This gesture got him several "Oh, James. Stay awhile," and of course, after some modesty, he stayed, but did not overshadow the host with the birthday. You should learn to not always crowd the limelight when there is someone else present who deserves it more.
Now let's look at
James Coburn's behavior and conduct at a classy party:
- Coburn had a mild way of speaking. Not bellowing what he wanted to say. That would be gosh. Coburn loved to be around people of class so he acted classy. The two elements fit like a glove. Do you get what I am trying to teach you? To be what you want to be, be what you are trying to be.
- When he was at any party, but frankly, Coburn seldom showed himself at a small get-together unless it was with a hot starlet. Coburn loved high-class cocktail parties and had the money to afford going to them and throwing them. Before you really get to rolling in your quest to be the center of attention, party within your means.
- Use your eyes to your advantage. When someone is talking to you, make instant eye-contact with them. If it's a lovely woman, stare directly into her eyes. She will be captivated with your gesture. Note: before attending a classy party, use a few eye drops before you go in. No woman appreciates looking into the eyes of a man with blood-shot eyes.
Now it's time to inspect
James Coburn's topics he talked about at classy parties:
- Current events in politics, only if the subject arises. Coburn himself was not into politics that deep, but kept himself up to date about current politics just in case he was asked to comment to an important person at a party about them.
- Fashions--mostly women's fashions. Yes, this manly-man, Coburn had a fascination for women's fashions. He was a self-made expert on what looked good on a woman and what did not.
- Cheap gossip was out of the question when talking to James Coburn, but film-making, photogrqphy were just two of his favorite topics to discuss.
- Foreign sports cars--would have to be the "number one" topic that Coburn loved to talk about to anyone. Even if a lovely girl liked the latest in Italian sports cars, Coburn treated her with his wisdom of gear ratio's, air pressure in tires and how to get that extra boost of power from the car's engine.
- Investments were acceptable for Coburn to talk about, but was not at the top of his list of things to talk about at a classy party.
Things that James Coburn did not talk about at classy parties:
- Pets and their care. Coburn loved animals, but only those of African safari's.
- Health-issues and who was the best doctor to consult. On this list are the things that you do not ever discuss. They turned Coburn off and they will turn off the people you talk to. Do not make a mistake. Learn to not speak of the things on this list.
- Modern television and its place in society. Coburn was a film nut. He owned several television's, but those were for his guests when he threw a big party at his mansion. Coburn was an avid reader. Anything he could get his hands on during and after a film project he was working on, he would sit and read.
- Military and all of the sub-topics that went with it. Coburn was a huge anti-Vietnam war advocate and admired those like Jane Fonda, Paul Newman, Abby Hoffman and Jerry Rubin for trying to get our government to pull-out of Vietnam. Since those days, he never partook in any conversation that involved the military.
- Religion. If you really wanted to get a rise from Coburn, just mention religion.
Now we look at
Things James Coburn never did or said at parties or in public:
- Coburn never said, "Huh?" or "Yeah," for he thought that to be words of the ignorant. He was very well-spoken and precise when making a statement or answering a question.
- When a nice-looking woman entered the room, Coburn did not elbow his male friend and remark, "look at 'that," for he did not disrespect females.
- You never heard James Coburn whistle when something amazed him.
- You also never saw Coburn snap his fingers for he tried his very best to be above all of the things that common men do everyday.
- Coburn never scratched himself anywhere when people were around. He considered this action vulgar. He would excuse himself to the men's room for such things.
Other things Coburn did that you need to learn:
- Speak very little at times, but let your eyebrows do the talking. Raise them when someone says something interesting and look stone-faced when you hear something sad.
- Never lean against a piece of furniture or the wall, but stand firm like a strong man.
- If you must cough or sneeze, turn your head from those talking to you.
Do you think you can handle this operation of turning yourself from an "underdog," to a successful, confident, man of self-confidence?
Just remember . . .failure is not an option.