Bugged, Bothered and Bewildered Am I
And The Winner Is....
Good Morning Breakfastpoppers. Today is Wednesday, February 12, 2014. It is time for the second annual Bugged, Bothered and Bewildered Awards. Our friend Buzzy, the Proverbial Fly on the Wall, will be presenting the coveted awards. Please come to the theater this morning. Wear your Sunday best and Buzzy and I will greet you at the door with Mimosas and a smile.
Welcome, my dear human family. We have a fine slate of "winners" this morning awaiting the spotlight. Let's begin the show by presenting Democratic Rep. Gwen Moore of Wisconsin with a BBB Award for her strange explanation of how the troubling CBO report is really good news. The CBO reported that millions of jobs will be lost because of Obamacare. Rep. Moore declared that Americans really don't want promotions for hard work because promotions translate into higher taxes. In her mind, she foresees a brave new world where people work less and relax more. Can life get any better than being unemployed or stuck in a dead end job? By the way. Rep. Moore gives President Obama an 'A" in his second term for not being Mitt Romney! Forgive me Rep. Moore if I ask you to remind me how exactly you got elected.
The next BBB is presented to Congressman Keith Elllison, the distinguished Democrat from Minnesota. Rep. Ellison joins our prior winner in believing that loss of work hours due to Obamacare is a blessing in a very good disguise. After all, Americans work too much anyway when compared to other industrialized nations. He may be right. Standing on unemployment lines all day is very hard work.
A New Way to Govern
Our third award is presented to Rep. Sheila Jackson Le, the distinguished democrat from Texas. Rep. Jackson told her fellow Democrats that they shouldn't stress over getting together to create meaningful legislation. Instead, she told them they should be helping President Obama to create executive orders by giving the POTUS orders that he can enact into law! The sheer audacity of such a proposal has taken our collective breaths away. Please accept this BBB and a pocket addition of the Constitution.
Our next BBB is present to former Vice President Al Gore for suggesting that "fertility management" was key to fighting global warming and fostering economic development in poor countries. May I respectfully suggest that you get a hobby other than global warming. You might consider fashioning a canoe out of wood found languishing in the forest so that you can sail blissfully away into the sunset.
This next presentation is truly mind-boggling. Authorities at GITMO have allowed inmates to operate a "Business School Behind Bars". The dean of studies is an accused Al Qaeda financier! I can only suppose that the Obama Administration wants these terrorists to get up to speed before their release when it comes to financing the war on terror. The "student terrorists" already possess the tools to complete their homework. A few years ago they were given laptops and computer lessons!
Only in Chicagoland!
Students at the University of Chicago are going to be "enjoying" activities during Sex Week. One of the workshops is called "A Taste of Kink". Participants will be experiencing and exploring sensations that are generated by being flogged and electrocuted! There will be plenty of opportunity to learn how to perform better oral sex. Let's not leave out learning how to tie up a sexual partner. There will be courses that teach students how to talk dirty, which is extremely important when going on a job interview. It sounds like a blast, doesn't it?
Sane or Insane?
Are the inmates ruling the asylum?
Time To Say Good-bye...
It's time to call it a day. The "winners" have exhausted my patience and I need to stretch my wings.
Fly me to the moon
And let me live where I am free
Things are so strange on earth right now
That the moon sounds good to me!