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Clinton and Kennedy Family Conspiracies And what They Mean in America
Don't Think And Drive
A couple of weeks ago while driving either to or from work, an interesting thought wafted into my head from somewhere out on that mysterious ether from which writers collect their stranger ideas.
Perhaps I was listening to some self-appointed political pundit slash talking head at the time, droning on endlessly about the ugly red pimples on our Presidential candidates' respective donkey and elephant derrieres. Then some smoky smell blowing in through my air conditioner duct, or from my radio, made me think about conspiracies, how Americans love conspiracies. No matter how inoffensive a candidate may appear on the surface, there are always murdered bodies or at least grimy, waist-high laundry to be found festering in their closets. Some keen-nosed hound sniffing around the premises always finds something.
I try not to believe in conspiracy theories as a rule, but on this solitary drive, it suddenly occurred to me that the conspiracies revolving around the Kennedys involve them being murdered, whereas the Clinton family conspiracies suggest that they murder people. Why is this? Furthermore, is there any basis to these smoky, shady,mysterious imaginings of secret, behind the scenes machinations, or are they simply American mythology run amok?
Beneficiaries Behind The Bunk?
The great thing about conspiracy theories is that you don't have to prove them. In fact, the sheer lack of proof is taken as proof, because the conspirators are evidently involved in a giant cover up that completely sterilizes all incriminating signs of crime.
Then again, the conspiracy cover up artists sometimes leave footprints in the sand that make one scratch one's head and wonder. Perhaps there really isn't a conspiracy, perhaps these malefic actions truly are just curious coincidences, but sometimes the rapidly fading footprints washing away in the seawater make one ask the question of who benefited from the coincidental nefarious activities, and did they benefit repeatedly from repeated coincidences? One begins to think about the statistical probability of how many mysterious circumstances can surround a particular individual or group of individuals before a shape begins to develop out of the fuzzy cloud of random events.
It is in this light that I will examine these particular Clinton and Kennedy conspiracies. Most of the theories are probably pure bunk, but there are beneficiaries behind the bunk. This is why Americans, and probably people everywhere, form myths in the popular mind based upon their perception of the sketchy, distrusted, evil-agenda conspirators or their noble, defenders-of-the-popular-good victims.
I Shouted out, Who Killed the Kennedys?
The assassination of President of John F. Kennedy on November 22, 1963, propelled him into a legendary status that he probably would not have enjoyed had he completely lived through one, or possibly two terms in the White House. Because of his untimely death, JFK has been enshrined by both sides of the political spectrum, left and right. Even conservative bulldog Rush Limbaugh has been known to speak fondly of the man, who is safely sequestered in Arlington National Cemetery.
The subsequent assassination of JFK's brother Robert on June 5, 1968, during Bobby's own Presidential bid, further deepened the air of mysterious reverence surrounding the family. The public perception of the Kennedys seems to be that if their members keep getting killed, they must have tried to do something good that the nebulous powers behind the throne did not appreciate.
Of course, the negative conspiracies surrounding the Kennedys must also be taken into consideration. In particular, we have Ted Kenedy's involvement in the death of Mary Jo Kopechne, who died by drowning after an automobile accident at Chappaquiddick Island, Massachusetts on July 18, 1969. After alleged secret inquests and cover-ups Ted received a slap on the wrist, but dark allegations of him strangling Mary Jo followed him to the grave. Despite this one ugly red mark, however, for the most part the conspiracy balance sheet is favorable toward the Kennedys.
Future President Lyndon B. Johnson, the Mafia, the CIA, the military industrial complex, the Russians, and other shadowy figures have been implicated by conspiracy theorists in John F Kennedy's assassination. With Robert we can list all of the above as culprits, plus a mysterious girl in a polka-dot dress, a disgruntled security guard, Jimmy Hoffa, and commie brainwashers who turned SIrhan Sirhan into a Presidential killing robot. Curiously, the conspiracies surrounding both brothers both involve a second gunman, as if the powers behind the throne were so anxious to eliminate them that a backup Plan B was arranged, just in case..
Why are the Kennedys so revered in the minds of conspiracy buffs? Because they are dead, I think. Had both brothers lived, had Robert gone on to follow John into the White House, I am certain the sentiments surrounding the dynasty would have assumed the sinister tone coloring the Bush and Clinton families.
I am in accord with the Kennedy conspiracy theorists on one point. I give no credence to second shooters on grassy knolls, and I think Oswald acted alone - tactically. But as far as an overall strategic plan to kill the President, I want to know what assassin Lee Harvey Oswald was doing visiting the Cuban and Soviet embassies in Mexico a month before the assassinations. Marching orders? This bizarre occurrence may be put to rest in 2017, when CIA records related to this 1100 mile jaunt are scheduled to be released.
Another notable Kennedy death was that of John F. Kennedy Jr., via a plane crash in 1999. If your Facebook feed is flooded with Internet memes like mine, you may have seen our most dedicated conspiracy theorists circulating the idea that our next conspiracy encumbered family, the Clintons, took him out because he dared to challenge Hilary for the New York Senate seat in 2000. Truth or not, it makes for darn good memes.
Not since Charles Manson terrorized California in the late 60s has a "family" been accused of as many murders as the political dynasty of the Clintons, an allegedly murderous clan led by former President William Jefferson and current Presidential candidate Hilary Rodham. If you believe the memes and blogs and rumors, upwards of 50 people associated with the Clintons have been killed to snuff out witnesses of their nefarious deeds.
The murder weapon employed by these most skillful Clinton assassins is "mysterious circumstances," a favorite killing device for our more ardent conspiracy theorists. No, you won't find any damning Clinton fingerprints on smoking revolvers, or any of Bill's famous DNA swabbed off of the clothing of victims, other than the stained blue dress of a former White House intern, that is. The Clintons murder by natural causes like pneumonia and heart attacks, and also use random events like armed robberies, plane and automobile crashes, suicides, etc, all skillfully manipulated to look like accidents.
It seems that anyone who has ever died after having even the most casual association with the Clintons - shaking hands with Hilary in public or having their baby kissed by Bill on the campaign trail, winds up on the Clinton hit list. If Bill Clinton was your law professor and you later had the misfortune of dying under "mysterious circumstances," it meant he was having an affair with you, as good old philandering Bill is wont to do, and needed to cover it up.
Yet even the Clintons' most passionate opponents have been unable to find credible evidence to prove the family's homicidal tendencies. This includes Kenneth Starr, the special prosecutor who was assigned to investigate the suicide of Deputy White House Counsel Vince Foster, and in the process uncovered sexual misconduct in the Monica Lewinsky affair. The death of Foster was investigated three times, and no smoking gun or damning DNA was uncovered to blame it on Bill. The conclusion arrived at by Starr is that Foster simply shot himself.
As for the plethora of suicides associated with the Clintons, is it possible that constant exposure to Hilary's shrill voice is enough to drive associates over the edge? It will be interesting, though somewhat macabre, to see if a presidential victory by Hilary Clinton in 2016 means an increased suicide rate during State of the Union addresses. She has been thoroughly coached to smooth out some of the screeching, but can still hit uncomfortably high decibel levels when excited or pressed by an opponent.
The latest Clinton conspiracy theory du jour is that Hilary murdered John F. Kennedy Jr. by somehow shooting him out of the sky, or perhaps shattering his aircraft navigation equipment with one of her particularly high-pitched wails. She is blamed for this even though JFK's son had not declared for the vacant Senate seat at the time of his death, the one later filled by Hilary, and was reported to be only marginally interested in it.
Don't take my reluctance to denounce the Clintons as murderers as an endorsement. After what Hilary did to cheat and strong-arm Bernie Sanders out of the Democratic Party nomination, and what the destroyed emails and "pay for play" of the shady Clinton Foundation say about her and her hubby's character, I would love to believe the accusations are real. I can't help but think, however, that there's enough dirt on the Clintons to disqualify them from being elected so much as dog-catcher, if America really wanted to. But since America seems anxious to ignore the Clintons' real crimes, what good is making extra stuff up?
Did They Do It?
Are the Clintons murderers?
How Long Shall They Kill Our Prophets?
It is curious how even conservatives like Michael Savage embrace wild conspiracies about Kennedy deaths to attack the Clintons, even though I'm pretty sure that if John F. Kennedy Jr. had survived and been elected Senator from New York (assuming he was going to run), Savage would be attacking him too, and savagely.
After investigating these various Kennedy and Clinton conspiracies, albeit superficially, I have reached my conclusion. Particularly in the case of the latter political dynasty, there is indeed smoke welling up from a not so hidden flame, but the smoke would still be there without evidence of homicidal inclinations. In other words, there is no need to add murder to the Clinton rap sheet in order to convince reasonable voters to stop them from a return visit to the White House.
Conspiracies are a religious phenomenon. They exist on the basis of faith, not facts. In believing conspiracies, people bend the facts to fit their faith, selecting isolated bits of information that fit the pattern, and simply ignoring information that does not. Like religion, conspiracies make us feel better, they soothe troubled souls trying to make sense of a cruel universe.
The murdered Kennedys are America's dead prophets. Like our Christian and Jewish holy men, we enshrine them in a shroud of miracles and mystical qualities that they probably did not have when they were living. The Clintons, on the other hand, are our modern day prophet murdering Pharisees. We condemn them with a zeal that borders on the religious.
Crooks, I say probably, but murderers...?