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Don’t Ask…Period!

Updated on February 23, 2010


As the military bigwigs once again meet to try and figure out how to repeal the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” military policy to get rid of gays who will admit or get caught being gay I can’t help but think that really, it’s no one’s business who is gay and who isn’t. If you’re someone like me who doesn’t mind telling the world that you’re gay then great and if you’re someone who doesn’t want to tell the world good for you too. There’s no right or wrong in these two scenarios but what gets me is what a big deal the military (mostly fueled by the people who claim to talk and walk so often with Jesus) are making over the repeal of this stupid law. Don’t ask…period! – Don’t Get Me Started!

Is it anyone’s business who you have sex with as long as you’re two consenting adults? I think not. So why should that be a prerequisite for serving in the military? Please don’t tell me that this is going to become like credit ratings which need to be checked now for you to open a bank account or decide how much you’ll pay on car insurance (which has never made sense to me by the way). Honestly, there are lots of questions I ponder in my daily life that I think are better not answered.

I don’t want to know about my parents or most of my friend’s sex lives. I just don’t ask. I don’t really want to know what they put in fast food French fries that makes me love them so or whether or not the person serving them has just picked their nose before scooping mine out so I just don’t ask. There are millions of things that I simply don’t ask because I’m either afraid of the answer or just feel as though it’s none of my business so someone please explain to me why who you’re sleeping with has become a question that needs to be answered by those serving our country? We don’t ask when the Congress are boinking their Senate pages left and right. We don’t ask how much sex all of the straight politicians are having so why is everyone so concerned about us gays and how much sex we’re having? Jealous much, straightees?

As they have their congressional hearings and ask that the lawmakers repeal the Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy “cautiously” I have a better plan that could save the country millions. Just change “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” to “Don’t Ask” if someone wants to serve this country and are an able bodied person, they’re in. Simple, right? No need for everyone to wonder where everyone will shower or if the gays will redecorate the barracks, let’s be realistic. The military has policies that are strictly enforced when it comes to conduct and I hardly think that allowing gays to serve is going to cause orgy after orgy in the tents (much to the chagrin of many a gay man’s fantasies) and seems to me with sex scandals such as Tailhook and the rest it was the straights who were something out of Military Gone Wild and what happened to them? They were tried and prosecuted, done.

What gets me is that everyone seems to be worried about the gays serving “openly” when really the only thing that should be open is their eyes to the fact that there are many a gay out there who feel as though what they do sexually is only their business. So while the religious right would have the country believe that allowing gays to serve will make the experience something akin to gay Mardi Gras, I suspect that nothing negative will happen. I also suspect that there are so many serving right now under the radar that when the time comes that they can tell everyone most of them will decide not to for the simple reason that I stated above. As much as the media and Christian right would love to make you think we gays are all about boas and glittery parades, on the whole, most are just what I call “your average garden variety gays” who live normal lives, contributing to their communities and trying to make ends meet. So when this stupid law gets repealed I don’t think that the heavens will open and swallow America whole nor do I think that the gay troops will be swallowing anything different than their straight counterparts (at least in the chow line) and outside of the chow line, whose business is it anyway?

What we have to understand is that just because America is on a 24 hour news cycle and thinks that because almost everyone wants to be on reality television either getting their life back together on Intervention or Dr. Phil or becoming a pseudo-celebrity on Jersey Shore, the truth is there are a lot of people who will never get their fifteen minutes of fame and they’re okay with it. There are a lot of people who feel as though their business is their business and they don’t feel the need to share everything with everyone. People write into me all the time and think that I’m the character I’ve designed for this website but I can tell you that while there are many facets of me that I allow you access to through my writing, for the most part this is a character that I’ve created to entertain you and make me famous. So what you do in your bedroom I don’t want to know about and what I do in my bedroom you’ll never know about because I’m not interested in “leaking” a sex tape anytime soon. And what military personnel do between the sheets simply shouldn’t be a concern of ours. Don’t ask…period! – Don’t Get Me Started!

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    • somelikeitscott profile image

      somelikeitscott 5 years ago from Las Vegas

      Laura - Welcome aboard! You can find even more of my writings, vlog and more at!

      I hear you on the whole frustration on the straightees who still don't get it but we have to be patient as they try to get up to our level of fabulocity!!! Thanks for reading and writing!

    • LauraD093 profile image

      Laura Tykarski 5 years ago from Pittsburgh PA

      I must admit to having acquired a new addiction to add to my list of several others---love your candor in your hubs a sweet dose of reality without being preachy or without seeing humor in the stupidity of many of the fellow-folk in our supposedly free and democratic society. Please keep them coming. I had always wanted to start my own business and often thought about how amusing it would be to see how people would react if on my application and or during my interview process I would stipulate the importance of whom U choose to love. Throwing in a no-straight (whatever the hell that is now)hiring policy--and stating and or stipulating that all who have in the past participated only in opposite sex missionary sexual activity need not apply. Maybe then people would see how ludicrous having to know what people do in their private lives is- it has no bearing on job performance or anything else for that matter. Voted up and awesome...please keep feeding my new craving somelikeitscott seems I have become once again addicted to reality.

    • somelikeitscott profile image

      somelikeitscott 7 years ago from Las Vegas

      Adult Content - Thanks for reading and for your comments. You may be right however, the military works this way...the top brass give an order and the soldiers follow it out, period. If the order that was given was to continue to work alongside gays in the military (yes, there are all ready some in there) then eventually, following those rules I believe would create an environment where no one would care.

      As far as people not wanting to see their heroes gay? I don't know, Batman and Robin never got married and they wear tights! ;)

      Thanks again for reading.

    • Adult Content profile image

      Adult Content 7 years ago

      I don't know, man. Maybe the whole issue has something to do with stereotypes and the image of our military and morale and so forth. Not every guy in the military is open-minded, to say the least.

      I think a MAJOR problem here is NO ONE wants to acknowledge that at present the military is a choice. The people in the military CHOSE it as a job--some as a career and some as a temporary job so they can get the incredible benefits.

      So many people want to misuse the word "hero" and apply it to government employees. . .and MOST of us don't think about our heroes being gay.

      Perhaps if we admitted the joining the military was just a job and not like being in the Justice League of America or the Avengers then people would not have a problem with gays in the military.

    • ladyjane1 profile image

      ladyjane1 7 years ago from Texas

      WOW I totally agree with you on this hub, you hit all the right points with me concerning gays in the military. All those people that you mentioned are so worried about having GAY people in the military but nobody cares that Clinton was getting his rocks off in the Oval Office an office that should be respected. No one cares about all the straight guys having affairs left and right but one gay person in the military and everyone runs for cover. My ex husband was in the Air Force and one of his best friends was "gay' that was kept under wraps, he served got shot at in Iraq, got his leg blown off, Is the way he served in the military any less honorable then the straight guys. I don't think so and neither does that silver star, purple heart and medal of Valor that he brought home with him. I agree Who the hell cares?