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Gentleman -Let's discuss the truth and put the colorism issue bed in 2017

Updated on January 2, 2017

Beautiful Young Lady -Daddy's Little Girl

The Truth

Last year Cori Broadus , aka Choc, made a statement about embracing her beauty and being comfortable in her own skin. Now she accepts her beauty and resists haters. Hope she remembers that often people that try to criticize you don't have what you have. Think about how many do not have the involvement, love, status, and care of their fathers in their lives so they lash out as others to hide the issues they harbor in their hearts. Shine, hold your head up, and don't let people with mental and psychological issues effect your life negatively. Anyone that does not love what they see in the mirror will often be extremely critical of others -misery loves company.

Clarence Thomas - A perfect example of the issue at hand

The truth of it all can sometimes be explained when we examine those that have issues with other African Americans.

One Woman's Story

Let me start by saying that I'm 20 years old and I'm a dark skinned sista. Up until my current relationship, nobody I have dated ever made any reference to my skin tone (I am not ashamed of my color, I just don't think it should be an issue in whether or not a person wants to talk to me.)

On Sunday, while I was chilling in my boyfriend's room, his homeboy comes in and they start talking about girls. His boy looks at me and tells me that I'm pretty for a dark-skinned girl. My boyfriend jumps in and starts talking about how light-skinned women are so beautiful, how dark women are ugly, and how he should have gone to Southern (which is known for its light-skinned girls: we both go to Grambling).

He's been doing this a lot lately. It's confusing, as this is something he never did when we first started going out together. I've read about things like this happening to other people, but nothing compares to being face to face with it.” -posted on a black website in 2009, included in The Beauty Con Game

Really? Don't tell me colorism is not real.


Do You Find Beauty/Value in the opposite sex if they resemble your same skin tone?

See results

What message do you deliver to your daughters?

Men / Fathers

Cori's story made me consider another truth that I'm directly specifically to men. So many little girls have been victims of colorism to the point of low self-esteem, allowing men in their lives that hurt and harm them because they believe they don't deserve better. I can only wonder how many women lay in the bed exposing themselves to any disease because they don't have enough self-esteem and self-love to not put their life on the line just to have a man around. Some women have received a message that they don't have a right to have more, expect marriage, partner with a certain level of man because they received the message they were less than perhaps reinforced by experience and behavior of men. What does this have to do with you as a man, a father? Some of you love your daughters and spoil them like princesses but do not respect or value women that resemble the features of this beautiful little girl you love. Others treat their daughters, perhaps subconsciously, with less care and protection because of internalized issues of self-hate or colorism. My point-be aware that your daughters receive the messages that are not spoken. Your daughters are watching how you treat women and why you treat them the way that you do. Your absenteeism is perhaps the most damaging thing a young girl can experience because it sends the message they aren't value and do not matter. So allow me to make a point in the form of a poem:

You didn't know

I was watching your 32 teeth smile when she was the right shade of brown or didn't look like me at all

You didn't know

I watched you open doors and hold the elevator if she was “pretty in your eyes” but let doors and elevators close if she resembled the features you claim to value when you look into my eyes

You didn't know

I watched you have contempt and hate my mother while putting your best foot forward for others

You didn't know

I watched you flirt with people that didn't look like my mother while refusing to provide her love, support, and shelter

You didn't know

I watched you pick the females to put in the magazine and videos that never looked like me

You didn't know

I watched you change your attitude and spend your last chasing someone that didn't look like me

You didn't know

I watched you treat women differently

You didn't know

I was confused that you could love women that looked like me secretly

You didn't know

I was watching you. I received the truth through your actions and learned that words like “you're beautiful” - “I love you” - did not fit your actions


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