ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Sex and Drugs coming to the the Corner Store?

Updated on September 12, 2012
Billrrrr profile image

Bill Russo is featured in the film & TV show, The Bridgewater Triangle & has written several books (both fiction & non) on Amazon Kindle.

It all started with the humble Numbers Runner

Back in our nation's salad days of the 1950s - except for foreign territories like Las Vegas - there was no legalized gambling. There were of course, bookies and numbers men. The 'daily number' was a harmless bit of fun procured for a dollar from the local numbers runner. Based on the newspaper's published treasury balance, the bettor picked four numbers, such as 2763, and if they matched the number published in the paper, the lucky winner would get five hundred bucks cash money. No taxes, no forms to fill out, no strings. It was easy.

Then the government stepped in and decided to take over the numbers racket - so they forced the independent businessman out and put the numbers back where they really always had been--the corner grocery store. But this time, the authorities were getting their cut.

You walk in to a 7-11 and buy a gallon of milk and two lottery tickets.

Soon you will be able to buy ANYTHING in the corner store

Gambling was considered a weakness and a sin until the government took it over. Now it's merely a monetary unit based tax system. Using that rationale, the politicians may decide to take over prostitution. It will be legal and taxed.

You will walk into a 7-11 and buy one gallon of milk, two lottery tickets and one hooker. The clerk will say, "is that prostitute for here or to go?"

Don't worry. It's fine. As soon as the government takes over prostitution, it won't be a sin anymore!

After bringing the ladies of the evening into the fold, the pols can nationalize medicine and put all the doctors' offices in the 7-11 stores.

You will walk into a 7-11 and say, "one gallon of milk, two lottery tickets, a hooker, and one doctor's visit please."

The clerk will ask, "Would you like the doctor's visit before or after the prostitute?"

The next big thing the government will take over after medicine, will be DRUGS!!!! Yup. You got it. Just put 'em in the 7-11 and tax the s--t out of 'em!!!!!

You'll slide into the 7-11 and order, "one gallon of milk, two lottery tickets, one prostitute, one doctor's visit and three lines of cocaine."

And the clerk will ask the inevitable, "Is that for here or to go?"

The possibilities are endless. We can put liquor in the 7-11s. We can even sell cemetary plots in the back of the store. Better still - they can put a crematorium right inside the store. That will certainly heat things up. Heat is the operative word here.

We may as well put the ovens in the stores so we can get used to the heat....because between the hooker, the cocaine, the gambling and the liquor we're all going to hell anyway.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment
    • Billrrrr profile imageAUTHOR

      Bill Russo 

      6 years ago from Cape Cod

      Thanks for reading and for the wonderful comment. I really appreciate it.

    • woodamarc profile image

      Marc Woodard 

      6 years ago from Portland, Oregon

      Very creative story. Great bit of gambling and bookie history with a unique twist on government taking sin out of local sinful businesses by controlling them. Very humerous and entertaining. Thanks for the laugh. I'm voting this up and will now follow you. Every once and a while we all need a shot of humerous sarcasm.


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)