Buzzy Presents the BBB Awards
The Proverbial Fly on the Wall Buzzy
Bugged, Bothered and Bewildered
Good Morning, Breakfastpoppers. Today is Tuesday, May 27, 2014. Our busy friend, Buzzy, is here with me this morning at the breakfast table. He has extended an invitation to all of us to attend an award ceremony at the Theater of the Absurd. The show starts in 15 minutes. Won't you join us?
And So It Begins...
Thank you all for coming here this morning. Today's show will be fast and furious, so hang onto your seats and take a ride with me into a land where common sense is dead and insanity rule.
Our first BBB is presented to the University of St. Thomas in Minnesota for forcing the cancellation of "Hump Day", an event meant to celebrate the end of the school year. Students were going to bring a camel to campus, but officials at the school were afraid that students of Middle Eastern Cultures might be offended! I wonder, are camels inherently offensive? I didn't think so, but then again our world has been turned upside down by political correctness.
The next BBB award is presented to the Raleigh Hills Middle School, for suspending a student for drawing a doodle in class that depicted a person being hanged. The police were called in. It seems that everyone was called in, except for the parents. There are lawsuits in the works and I think that move is well-deserved.
The next award is presented to a school district in Rialto, California. They assigned 2,000 8th grade students to write an essay on whether or not they believe the Holocaust was "an actual event in history, or merely a political scheme." The Holocaust deniers must be dancing in the streets. There is more to this story, but it is best saved for another venue. Shame on this district and everyone involved for even considering that this issue is worthy of debate.
The next BBB is utterly ridiculous. A brand spanking new set of seating outside the home of the Plymouth Wildcats varsity boys' baseball field is being torn down. The reason provided is that the seating for the boys' and girls' must be equal. The seating was funded by money raised by parents. The parents did the installation themselves. Someone complained to the U.S. Education Department's Office for Civil Rights and the decision was made to rip the seating down!
I'm Not Yee!!
Anti-Gun Gun Trafficker?
This next award is a real head scratcher. California State Senator Leland Yee was arrested in March by the FBI on felony charges that ranged from gun trafficking to soliciting illegal campaign contributions in exchange for political favors. Yee was known for his tough stance on gun control.
Fun and Games
Let's present this next BBB to the workers at an Obamacare contractor who are hard at work playing Pictionary and falling asleep. One worker who quit the contractor Serco reported that there was no work for anyone to do! Your hard earned money is at work paying people to snooze.
Where's the Money?
Let's close the show with a bit of magic. The State Department somehow managed to misplace $6 billion allegedly due to the improper filing of contracts during the past six years, mostly during the tenure of former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. I have no idea what this means, but it sounds awful!
I want to thank you all for joining me this morning. We are providing antacids. Please feel free to take as many as you need on your way out of the theater.
Fly me to the moon
And let me rest where I am free
Things are so absurd right now
I think we're up a tree!