His Majesty’s Midwest Mystery Tour
Tra la His Majesty’s Mystery Tour, Tra la His Majesty’s Mystery Tour, His Majesty’s Mystery Tour is coming to take you away, coming to take you away to Naiveté’! Well friends welcome to His Majesty’s Mystery Tour, let’s peek inside the bus and hear what His Majesty is saying to all his still loyal minions out there who have long sense lost their grip on reality.
Cannon Falls, Minn., His Majesty launched an attack Monday on the GOP presidential field, criticizing Republican hopefuls for what he contended was their blanket opposition to any compromise involving new taxes. Why would any sane person oppose raising taxes in the middle of this country’s worst recession since our last Great Socialist Experiment under Comrade Jimmy Carter. Everyone knows raising taxes stifles economic growth, everyone except His Majesty who after all is about finishing the job he started January 2009, destroying the American Economy and cutting us down to size! Hear the crowd roar; O-BAM-A O-BAM-A-CLASS WAR-FARE CLASS-WAR-FARE!
He went on to explain to the roaring bumpkins, "Think about that, that's just not common sense," "You need to take a balanced approach." Balanced to His Majesty means the 53% that pay no taxes continue to feed from the Big Government Trough while the remaining Tax Payers just have to cough up more! Fair Share means all you have Atlas until you finally have had enough and shrug!
Then His Majesty defended his Big Government approach by adding, "As frustrated as you are about politics don't buy into this notion that somehow government is what's holding us back." Government is precisely what’s holding this economy back; companies aren’t hiring because of Obama Care; companies aren’t hiring because of this Government’s anti business policies; companies aren’t hiring because of this Governments over reaching EPA which is implementing Cap and Trade through regulations whereas they couldn’t ram it through legislatively; Companies aren’t hiring because of this Government’s Union Policies which ran Boeing out of this country instead of allowing them to expand into South Carolina; need any more examples Barrackie Boo?
Finally His Majesty accused congress of putting politics ahead of the country; was it Congress who insisted on Ramming Obamacare through over the objection of 68% of the electorate; was it Congress who saved the UAW while stiffing investors in GM giving them pennies on the dollar for their investment so as to protect the UAW by keeping the company out of bankruptcy court; was it congress who sued Boeing in Federal court in order to keep them from moving jobs from Seattle to South Carolina instead forcing them to relocate in Mexico in order to protect Union demands; was it congress that sued Arizona in order to protect the millions of Undocumented Democrats streaming across our southern border? It was not congress but the biggest left wing ideologue ever to occupy the oval office that did all these things and more!
So my friends as he continues to traverse the Midwest in his million dollar hearse appropriately painted black to symbolize the death of the American Economy which he is personally responsible for we are forced to listen nightly to his plethora of excuses. Make no mistake about it we are in the middle of a recovery; HUH? I created over 2,000,000 jobs with my stimulus package; true but you destroyed or ran overseas over 6,000,000 jobs with your Regimes Left Wing Agenda! Don’t blame me; it was the Arab Spring; the Japan Tsunami; those Republicans who refused to Compromise on Raising Taxes; Santa Clause, the Easter Bunny; the Tooth Fairy; get the picture!
I for one will be glad when His Majesty, the Queen and his two little Princesses all trot off to that Vineyard on the east coast where they can engage in conversation with fellow upper-crusters and wash away the infernal dust from that horrid bus trip across the Midwest where they were forced to smile while attempting to educate those gun toting, bible clinging bumpkins!