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Pardon me, America. Can we please act like grown-ups now?

Updated on November 11, 2016

Quietly horrified.

I have been completely silent during this election. Not because I have nothing to say, but because I’ve been listening. I’ve been observing, soaking it all in. I haven’t posted, shared, “liked” or commented on any political post on any social media platform this year--not one. I’ve barely even discussed my rather strong opinions with my own friends and family.

My silence started out as a way to quietly formulate my own opinion before opening my mouth. (Remember that lost bit of courtesy?) But nowadays, my lack of discourse stems mostly from a quiet horror—I’ve been shocked into silence you might say.

America, what is going on?

Feasting on the sewage of this election.

Honestly, I was hoping our gluttonous feasting on the raw sewage of this election would be over. But I’m afraid we have become so FAT with hate and anger that we’re still vomiting rage every time we open our mouths. Why?

I wonder how long we can verbally abuse our families, our friends, our neighbors, our fellow Americans, before it dawns on us these are the very people who make our lives good. Somehow, we’ve replaced our very real and personal relationships, with some perceived relationship with a politician. A Talking Head. A person who (let’s be honest), cares nothing about your life, your dreams, your children, or your future. And yet, here we are, completely willing to throw away tangible relationships—actual people—like some kind of sick human sacrifice to a politician. Just…wow.

NO president is more important than my relationships.

In the years to come when this is all over, what will the President Elect (no matter who they are) have done that is more valuable than our life-long relationships with actual humans? Will HE be at our Thanksgiving tables? Will he be bouncing our babies on his knee? Will he be sitting around the Christmas fire exchanging thoughtful gifts with us? Will he be by our deathbeds, holding our hands and comforting us as we pass on? And if SHE were the President Elect, would she have done any of these things? No, of course not. But our families will. Our friends will.

You can't LOVE America, and HATE Americans.

We have completely lost sight of what is real, what is important, and what is tangible in this country. We speak as if “America” is the four walls in which these people live. When in reality, “America” is the people who live within these four walls. You can’t love America and hate Americans.

How insane is it to gloat about America finally being “great again,” and then turn around and treat half of the country as if they were worthless trash? How crazy is it to complain about electing a “hateful” president, then protest by saying and doing hateful things? People, there is medication for this kind of behavior!

What does GREAT actually mean anyway?

I think it’s safe to say that no matter who our president is, this country will never, ever be “great” until we start treating each other great. Until we show our kids how to act great. Until we have a great attitude. Until we strive for great goals. Until we start doing great things for each other. Until we become great people. THAT is how to make a country great.

THAT is how we get back on track. That is how we regain civility and decency. That is how we conduct ourselves if we care about others--and our country--even a tiny bit.

NO president can make or break my life.

Maybe it’s time to shut off the news--trust me, no one is saying or doing anything worth hearing or seeing. Maybe we can get off our social media accounts for a minute--we already saw that hateful meme. Maybe we need to silence all the noise and racket in our heads, and go somewhere quiet.

Maybe it’s time to figure out what kind of world WE want to live in, and then be the kind of PEOPLE who live in that kind of world.

Let’s stop acting as if the President—ANY President—can make or break our lives. Only we can do that. And from what I’m seeing, we’re doing a whole lot more breaking of lives than making of lives.

It's time to pull up our BIG-KID pants!

No one is responsible for the direction of this country but us; individual people, making individual choices. A president is not some kind of moral rudder, forcing us to act one way or another. That’s not his (or her) job. It’s ours. Time to wake up, put on our big-kid pants and ask ourselves, “What have I done lately to make my country better?”

Step back, re-gain perspective, and move on.

In the meantime, let’s throw a ball with our kids, kiss our “significant other,” walk our dog, treat our neighbor with respect, and quit throwing temper tantrums.

As for me and my family, we will continue to conduct ourselves with decency, respect, and a sound mind.

That’s all I have to say on the matter.

What do you think? Please leave your (civilized) comment below.

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    • Carrie Anne V profile imageAUTHOR

      Carrie Anne Valenzuela 

      23 months ago from California, USA

      Thanks for your input, Mel! I find it rather sad that as a country, we have this amazing gift of free-speech...and then choose to use it to say such ugly, unproductive things to eachother. I thinks we've all have had the misfortune of that experience this election. Great comment, thanks for sharing!

    • Mel Carriere profile image

      Mel Carriere 

      23 months ago from San Diego California

      Very well spoken. I tried to keep my mouth shut, but I couldn't and paid the price. Even a different shade of the same color is not good enough for the ultra-fanatics. You have to maintain complete political orthodoxy, or you are shunned and stoned in the street. Great hub.

    • Carrie Anne V profile imageAUTHOR

      Carrie Anne Valenzuela 

      23 months ago from California, USA

      I appreciate your nice comments, Lynette. I completely agree with you! Thanks for reading.

    • profile image


      23 months ago

      This is an appropriate article for all. We may not like the president elect, or agree with what he does, but we can show the people we care about love & patience.

      I do believe that leaders can change the world, look at what happened in the 40's. pray that never happens again, such hate.

      Thanks for a nice article!

    • Carrie Anne V profile imageAUTHOR

      Carrie Anne Valenzuela 

      23 months ago from California, USA

      Hi Sanxuary, I respect your thoughts on this matter. I agree with you about a two party leaves out a lot of us (including myself). However in this article I was wanting to point out that regardless of the outcome of this presidency, turning against each other is not the answer. Kindness and decency is something each person CAN control. Thanks for sharing! :)

    • profile image


      23 months ago

      I think people are way to naïve because this nightmare is only getting started. We are only one bad move a way from tyranny or anarchy. I am not rooting for anyone who believes in two failed parties but I doubt that anyone is going to escape the wrath of this situation.

    • Carrie Anne V profile imageAUTHOR

      Carrie Anne Valenzuela 

      23 months ago from California, USA

      RTalloni, thanks for your comment. I agree with you 100%. Wouldn't it be great to have a president we could look up to as a beacon of morality and good judgment! Sad that it's not often we have a leader like that. Thank goodness we have the freedom to make personal choices about how and who we want to be as individuals...and by extension, a country. Thanks for your excellent points--and for

      keeping it downright decent. :)

    • RTalloni profile image


      23 months ago from the short journey

      Some great points here. Love the bit on news media having nothing to say worth listening to. Was thinking about how their initial shock at the election's outcome was a classic example of how they had come to believe their own lies. The feeling shown in their faces did not reflect their words that night. That they continue to promote divisiveness is criminal and a good enough reason to speak up about not listening to them.

      Also love the point on a president not being our moral rudder. Though I do believe it does a country good if they behave in ways that reflect high ethics, faithful courage it do what is best amid complicated circumstances, and a willingness to listen to and work with good counsel, if they don't, people do not have to follow their bad example.


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