Social Media; Negativity, Ego, Violence, Cyberbullying and Impact.
What do you think?
Do you find there is more negativity today than years ago?
We are all negative from time to time for different reasons and situations, but we are also becoming more negative when our beliefs are attacked, or our way of thinking is challenged and in many cases, just because we didn't get our way.
Examples of this include the rise in "protests" that are far from peaceful, they are violent, they are destructive and they are disturbing. They include buying the Flag of their country, that countless of men and women throughout history have bled and died for. This is not freedom of speech in my humble opinion, this is pure destruction, it is legally setting something on fire with a smirk on your face.
"Looting" as the media calls it, another example of "protesting" that by all appearances seem to be acceptable now. This is not looting! Again, in my humble opinion, it is breaking and entering, it is robbery in public view, it is destroying something that another has spent a lot of time and money building to hopefully secure their future and provide a local service.
Another example is physical violence during these "protests" that have become more and more normal for Americans to witness and be absolutely disturbed and many directly impacted by. Why is this cycle of negativity unchallenged?
Cyberbullying is such a big concern because it REAL. It is so big that governments have enacted laws and policies because of it, and have dedicated web pages to assist victims.
I think that ego has a lot to do with the negative reactions to everything. I also think that we can all do better, because we are better than this.
A negative ego impacts everyone, including children. Beyond the obvious however, it also impacts your entire life, from your waking moments to the time you fall asleep. I believe that our "true selves" are kind, compassionate and caring people, and with that I also believe that the "social experiment" has brought about the negativity and also the issues that make us want to explode. We are consistently overcome with copious amounts of information, have you noticed that only a small percentage of that information is good news? A good deed? A life saved or a second chance given? I haven't. I have noticed a media flurry of antagonism and one sided scenarios, and I have also noticed the lack in ethics not only with journalists but also with us, the watchers, the readers and the participants.
How can we change this?
I read an article by Tiny Buddha which is 10 steps to help guide us to being more positive and I'd like to share the excerpts with you and also the link.
1. Meditate or do yoga.
One of the first things I did was head to a yoga class. It took my focus away from my thoughts and brought my attention to my breath. Yoga is also very relaxing, which helped ease my mind. Yoga helped me stay present to my experience so instead of jumping to what could happen, it brought me back to the now—the only moment, the most important moment.
I didn’t do much of this during the weekend, so I literally had to bring myself in front of a mirror and force myself to smile. It really does help change your mood and relieve stress. I also felt lighter because it takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown.
3. Surround yourself with positive people.
I called a friend who I knew could give me constructive yet loving feedback. When you’re stuck in a negative spiral, talk to people who can put things into perspective and won’t feed your negative thinking.
4. Change the tone of your thoughts from negative to positive.
For example, instead of thinking, “We are going to have a hard time adjusting to our living situation,” think, “We will face some challenges in our living situation, but we will come up with solutions that we will both be happy with.”
5. Don’t play the victim. You create your life—take responsibility.
The way I was thinking and acting, you would think I was stuck. Even if our living situation becomes unbearable, there is always a way out. I will always have the choice to make change happen, if need be.
6. Help someone.
Take the focus away from you and do something nice for another person. I decided to make a tray of food and donate it to the Salvation Army. It took my mind off of things and I felt better for helping someone else.
7. Remember that no one is perfect and let yourself move forward.
It’s easy to dwell on your mistakes. I felt terrible that I acted this way and that I wasted our weekend. The only thing I can do now is learn from my mistakes and move forward. I definitely don’t want to have a weekend like that again.
I don’t remember lyrics very well and it’s probably the reason that I don’t enjoy singing, but every time I do sing I always feel better. When we sing, we show our feelings and this provides an amazing stress relief.
9. List five things that you are grateful for right now.
Being grateful helps appreciate what you already have. Here’s my list: my cats, health, a six-week trip to Asia, a new yoga class that I’ll be teaching, and for my mom’s biopsy coming out clean.
10. Read positive quotes.
I like to place Post-It notes with positive quotes on my computer, fridge door, and mirror as reminders to stay positive. Also, I’d like to share with you a quote by an unknown author that was shared in a meditation class that I attended:
Watch your thoughts, they become words.
Watch your words, they become actions.
Watch your actions, they become habits.
Watch your habits, they become your character.
Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.
Happy positive thinking!
I think these are great ideas and I am going to try them all, I hope that you do also :-)
Burning the flag
The Social Expierment
I use this term to represent the social media aspects of our lives, with the biggest being FaceBook, where you will find a gazillion opposing opinions, fake news that is widely spread, real news that is delivered with a misleading headline almost every time and the content, especially if political, being very bias toward the companies political affiliation. Where are the ethics? A journalist should be completely unbiased, and that left the news room long, long ago, I think it is time to bring that back and hold companies liable for the attempt to sway and mislead. That's just me.
Here is the definition of "social experiment" by Wikipedia.
A social experiment is a research project conducted with human subjects in the real world. It typically investigates the effects of a policy intervention by randomly assigning individuals, families, businesses, classrooms, or other units to different treatments or to a controlled condition that represents the status quo. The qualifier "social" distinguishes a policy experiment from a "clinical" experiment, typically a medical intervention within the subject's body, and also from a laboratory experiment, such as a university psychology faculty might conduct under completely controlled conditions. In a social experiment, randomization to assigned treatment is the only element in the subject's environment that the researchers control. All other elements remain exactly what they were.
I see an impact on society as a whole online, but not so much in the grocery store where it seems that we suddenly become ourselves again; being polite, courteous and happy.
Oh yes, on occasion I have been to Walmart and been rammed with a cart without so much as a second glance nor an apology, but I see that as a "personality" issue, not so much an ego issue. The ego issue might come into play when I then take said cart, grab it and ram the person with it while yelling and screaming at them. That there is literally the making of Negative ago and its impact. :-)
Instead in such a situation, while it may seem awkward at first, you could try to say to the cart rammer, excuse me, but you have hit me really hard with your cart, did you not notice? WAIT for a reply before speaking again, you may find that despite your belief, they did not notice. Or they did and will now apologise as they have been politely confronted. I won't suggest that you ignore it, especially if it hurt, I wouldn't but if you can't be polite about it, do ignore it.
How we speak to one another online is embarrassing, appalling and ego driven!! I did my own experiment on Facebook to test this idea or theory of mine out and what I found was ...without sounding like a cliche "sad" and "obvious negative ego driven content designed to look like a positive". Or in some cases, just abrupt, rude and obnoxious insults to anyone who differed with them.
This is how we talk to other?
Looting or Robbery?
Do you think the media should say "robbed" or "looted?"
Business owners aftermath
Do you think it should be a felony to burn your countries flag?
The burning of Old Glory
Negative ego vs Positive ego
Social Media and Anger - Studies
I found an article on Digital Trends that really explains my thoughts on social media and anger and they actually conducted a study of their own in 2013 that was more prevalent to Weibo, which is used for Chinese blogging and Twitter, however the same applies to Facebook as I have pointed out in my postings. I left out many postings that were too vulgar and inappropiate to share. They concluded that anger is trend, everyone is angry!
The US National Library of Medicine, National Institutes of Health also wrote a very lengthy manuscript on the subject of "Electronic Media Violence" which leans more toward movies that we watch, video games, and other television shows we watch. I am including a link to this also because it is important; If we are living and breathing anger, violence and some sort of ego superiority on a daily basis, wouldn't it make sense that if there is no peace, there will be no peace?
A mean ego on social media amounts to cyberbullying and in Australia they have a web page dedicated to explaining what it is, how to get help and a link to every state and territory so that the user can look up the law in that place to see what their options are. This is a BIG indication to me that "The Negative Ego Impact" is real and not something that I am conjuring up here. If you live in Australia and would like information on how to get help if you are bullied, please contact Australia Human Rights Commission..
If you live in the United States, you can get information on policies and laws from the stop bullying website.
There is also a guide to worldwide Bullying laws, that you may be interested in looking into.
If you are being abused and bullied online, I hope this information assists you in getting the help you need and deserve.
If you are continuing to participate in name calling, threatening, and abusing other members of an online media source, or in real life you can get help, reach out to someone you trust and come up with a plan to stop it, if you don't think that you can, make an appointment with a local psychologist who should be able to help you come up with a plan to end the cycle of bullying.
I looked all over to find any credible information or links that a person who bullies could go to in order to get help, and to my astonishment, I could not find any. All of the information is centered around the victim, and that is fair enough, but I think that as a society we should also be addressing the cause as much as the solution, and by addressing the cause, I don't mean just publishing what makes a bully behave that way, I mean some real time help and assistance before this behaviour seeps into adult hood, and goes from cyber bully to perhaps a participant in Domestic Violence and so forth.
Linking the anger issue?
Is there a link between Cyberbullying and domestic violence?
Looting and shooting
Social media plays role in Domestic Violence
© 2016 Lisa