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The Reality Series: Help!! People are Envious of me

Updated on July 30, 2017
Someone died for these shoes, and it was not a woman.
Someone died for these shoes, and it was not a woman. | Source

Have you come across any instance where someone wanted your perfume so badly that they did not care if they went to hell for it. Or someone staring at your hand bag like it is the last thing he or she will see before they die and fade into oblivion according to their wishful thinking. Have you ever been told that your newly bought jewellery will just turn black in a matter of days. Or that bottle of Coke you are about to drink will kill the person if you drink it.

How to spot one

Sometimes it is quite obvious when you see a roasted expression on someone’s face, and sometimes it is not so easy. The envious can be pretty obvious or just plain wolves in sheep clothing. They will question you about your belongings, how much did you buy this for, oh God that is overpriced. That is a potential envious. They will tell you that they buy these kind of things all the time and they have a closet full of expensive clothes and bags. They might launch into how they went for romantic dinner with their partner at an expensive hotel when really the partner was too drunk to speak last night or is broke with bank accounts bursting with criminal money. Or they might just plain be short of speech in your presence, they will just stare at your face with an expressionless emptiness, and many a times when you will turn around in some public place, you might see them lurking nearby at a samosa shop.

A lot of them are just plain straight forward. They would seek sympathy, crying about everything in their lives. Complaining about all the good things and all the bad things. It does make an envious person feel like crying when they cannot add a shiny new bag on someone else’s shoulder into their arsenal of warehouse full of bags.

Some might just change a million colors in your presence like a chameleon, turning literally green with envy.



There are people who have room full of belongings, stashed away in buildings. They also happen to be the most envious ones. Anything nice and shiny catches their greedy eye, thieves and monsters lie waiting in dark corners of the world. Some are more interested in earnings rather than earrings. They have different specialty areas. Some like bags, others jewellery, some are gluttonous food monsters who want to eat everything and everyone. Hoarders are the worst kind of species among the evil ones, hoarders of money, hoarders of belongings and hoarders of women.

Jealous without reason or purpose

People sometimes experience unreasonable jealousy, anyone living in the lap of luxury with plentiful at their disposal should not feel that way at all. There are people who are happy with the all the good things in life which has come through lawful means no matter how little it may seem to the rest of the world, it is enough. It gives satisfaction and happiness, pure love and pure belongings. Sometimes clean air is treasure enough.

Don’t know how to deal with their curious jealous selves

And these people who experience this kind of curious jealousy do not know how to deal with it, other than in destructive ways. Anything which is unreasonable should be dealt with reason. But they do not reason.

Have enough themselves just don’t want others to have it

It is a strange thing indeed, they have everything that mostly does not belong to them, yet they still do not want others to have anything at all, they want them begging on streets for food or just rolling in dirt and heat. What is wrong with people like that? They are insane, accept that. Insanity caused by evil intentions and an evil heart.

The world is for everyone not a single minded creep

When the world was created, I am sure it was kept in mind that there would be enough resources for everyone to live a decent life. I have repeated in my previous essays, that it is only collectively that the human society can find progress, stability and existence.

Sentiments: It can be flattering to the people being envied

There is something which needs to be made clear, nobody likes anyone constantly breathing over their belongings and food. It might seem a little flattering at first, it soon explodes into a feeling of torture and nuisance. These men and women are like pests who constantly crave for things other people have and are ready to go to dangerous criminal lengths to get that shiny red bag.

Someone turned to dust for this bag.
Someone turned to dust for this bag. | Source

How to deal with it the envious people

  • Send them a hideous photo album; wearing all the hideous clothes your mom bought when you were a child. Make sure they are actually hideous with you lying in strange neck angles, looking like an abnormal child. This would never work for cute babies, do not send your pictures to perverts.
  • Tell them they look pretty, even though they look like they are having a hangover or suffering from an episode of persistent drag queen makeover.
  • Tell them the jewellery fell into the gutter, or make sure there is some flour dough stuck to your ring, narrate how you work all day long at home.
  • The watch is imitation, tell them the watch with its blinding glimmer is actually not real.
  • The car breaks down all the time.
  • Tell them the bag is second hand from the lands of prosperity and abundance, they send it to the poor third world countries like Pakistan and we the poor people of Pakistan wear those second hand used items with pomp.
  • Buy them lunch, gender appropriate no mingling between men and women, and tell them you don’t have money at the last minute explaining how broke you are
  • Don’t ever smile at them, it irritates them.
  • Avoid them.
  • Don’t even think about being nice, that is one of the most terribly fatal things people do with the envious people, it just exacerbates the jealousy, (oh beautiful or rich and NICE??? Argghh)
  • If they know your husband is handsome, tell them he is a fat liar and he has lost his job.

The above does not work for people who live in the public eye all the time because people know everything about them anyway, works for commoners.

Be credible. Nothing wrong with a little misleading for your own well-being and the well-being of the planet.

If you are important lie only when you feel there is a dire need for it to save humanity from the atrocious attacks of monsters, if you are not an important person lie around 20 to 50 percent to save yourself and your family. Only to save yourself and the world not for recreation or deception. You can just hide your precious jewels or not buy them at all. That is also something you can do. But deprivation might lead to other problems. Jealousy yourselves perhaps. But if you are good with it, that is actually a really good strategy.

Of course the other thing you can do is brag. Be prepared for the perfect storm.


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