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Victim In A Courtroom
Being in a courtroom can be scary. Eyes of stranger's staring. The ears of the stranger waiting to hear every word. The defendant is staring, trying to intimidate, as eyes meet the victim cannot get their eyes way; they're glued. Words just stopped flowing and the eyes began to water. Everything that happened is playing like a movie in the mind and eyes are still on the defendants. The room starts spinning out of control and those eyes want so badly to close and escape the evil eyes staring back. Question after question;tear after tear. Life is at a stand still and nothing is ever coming to an end.
Swinging back in forth in the chair biding nails and mumbling. Scared of what is going to come out of this. Not knowing what to say and scared to not understand a question. Testifying may be the hardest thing to do. Especially when a victim is unsure if testifying is the right thing to do.
Thinking about what the defendant had done. Trying to figure out if what they did really matters. If the words, “I lied” would just come out this whole thing could go away. If we could all pretend this never once happened, could all this pain go away.
An hour will go by then two. The two sets of eyes are still gazing at one another. One set is full of hate and betrayal while the other set his full of sadness. More questions will come through and the lawyers will repeat themselves trying to get a reaction or a change in the story. Consistence is key.
Three hours will go by. The chair will grow uncomfortable and everyone around you knows your story. The cameras are filming what is said, and it sees the victims eyes on the defendants. It sees it all capturing it for the world to see. How one person can take all the stares and quiet whispers is beyond me. The judge sitting over everyone learning, listening. Choosing a side;secretly.
Four hours will feel more like eight and the victim will realize this will be the last time eyes can be locked on one another. To enjoy it would be a bad thing, right? He may be getting put away for quite some time.
Then time will slow down even more but you can tell it is almost done when the defendant's hands began to circle around each other, anxiously waiting for the right words to come out of the victims mouth, “I lied.”
Five hours has gone by and the victim is allowed to step down. The victim will feel all eyes on them while they walk away. People whispering and making judgments they should not be making. Before walking out of the courtroom a deep breath will be taken and then a quick relief and it will all be gone.
Just when the victim thinks the night is over family and friends will call. Asking nosy questions and telling what they had seen on the local news. Thoughts pouring. Tears flowing. When will the thoughts stop?
The night after testifying will seem scary. Alone in the dark. Not knowing who to turn to. Afraid of going to the wrong person. Dreaming of those eyes. Thinking about it all. Wishing it were all finished and done. One thing. Its not over and its not done there is still the juries decision. Will they believe you, do you want them to?