Chide & Prejudice
Like baseball? Too bad.
NEWSFLASH: April 14th, 1947: Major League Baseball Closes Doors In Protest As Dodger’s Owner Branch Rickey Debuts Jackie Robinson
It appears as though the “Great American Pastime” is in jeopardy as Major League Baseball announced today that it will shut down operations and the opening of the summer season this year as a result of Branch Rickey’s decision to sign the negro Jackie Robinson to a contract with the Brooklyn Dodgers. A coalition of league executives along with club and stadium owners calling themselves the “Freedom Fighters” led by activist Bob Welch and fledgling Wisconsin senator Joseph McCarthy claim that, “…the integration of white sports is an abomination that the American people do not want and will not stand for.”
Apparently the little known freshman senator’s views are gaining support among politicians on capitol hill. When asked about the crowds of outraged fans McCarthy replied, “They’ll get over it. The American people elected us to do a job and by God that’s what we aim to do. We are the voice, the real voice of the people.”
McCarthy’s claims are further fueled by Bob Welch’s allegations that the negro community is rife with communists and communist sympathizers.
“We have it on good authority that Jackie Robinson may have actually been born in Moscow and is an active member of the Communist Party.”, Welch said in an interview with New York Times cub reporter Dicky Cruise. “It’s a known fact that he speaks Russian, German, Italian, Spanish, French, Greek, Hebrew, Urdu, Japanese and Swahili. If that’s not a tip off I don’t know what is!”, Welch went on to say.
Other sources report of seeing Robinson reading the infamous Soviet newspaper Pravda, while he was a student at UCLA. Robinson is also suspected of being involved with a female Russian exchange student, Natasha Fatale, while attending a physics symposium last year at WMU in Minnesota.
When asked about the shut down Branch Rickey retorted, “This is ludicrous! Look at the man’s baseball record not the color of his skin! He’s batting .349 with 113 RBI’s and 40 stolen bases! Who can argue with that?! America is more interested in the grace of a man's swing, in the dexterity of his cutting a base, and his speed afoot, in his scientific body control, in his excellence as a competitor on the field than they are in the pigmentation of a man's skin. He’ll make a believer out of you if you’d just give him a chance.” In lieu of today’s events it’s doubtful that Jackie Robinson will ever get that chance.
“The blame for the shut down of major league baseball lies at the feet of Jackie Robinson and Branch Rickey.”, claims Philadelphia Phillies manager Ben Chapman. “They(Rickey & Robinson) know the rules, both written and unwritten. My team won’t play with the likes of him(Robinson). If we have to play on the same field with him(Robinson) we won’t play at all and neither will anybody else.”, Chapman said.
“We have to make a stand now before this thing gets out of control.”, says stadium owner Mitch McHubris. “We’re setting a precedent here. If we don’t act now, before you know it, the negro will be wanting the same rights as white people. If you ask me Rickey’s been hitting the sauce pretty heavy here lately. Everybody knows he loves to drink. It’s a shame. He’s not in his right mind.”
Club owner Eric Singer says of Robinson, “Sure Jackie Robinson did well in the Negro Leagues but I seriously doubt he’ll do well here(Laughs). This is Major League Baseball! He’ll embarrass himself and Branch Rickey when he faces the superior talent this league has in it’s arsenal. We are a very structured organization and as everybody knows, the Negro League players are a bunch of amateurs and hacks. They have a hard time keeping their teams sober and out of jail and struggle to maintain a full rosters for their games.”
Crowds of angry fans flocked to the major league stadiums today to protest the shut down of the upcoming season. Some of the protest signs were aimed at Robinson & Rickey but most blamed the baseball commissioners. Due to the fact that the commission is appointed and paid by club and stadium owners it is no wonder that baseball commissioner Johnny Bonedus was unavailable for comment.