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Why Are People So Rude?

Updated on January 9, 2018

Manners Should Be Taught From An Early Age

When I was a kid, manners were the most important things anyone could have, my mother would not have bad mannered children. So as a consequence, all five of her children always said please and thank you and had the best manners we could. I remember one incident where my older sister told my mum I hadn't said thank you to the cashier in Woolworths (I had, she was just being mean) so she dragged me back in by the hand and made me say thank you, the lady told her I already had and we left. But the point is, there were no let ups, you had manners and you were to use them at all times. Nowadays this would be considered child abuse and my mum would be reported to the police for being cruel.

But she wasn't cruel to do what she did, she was right, because although it might seem harsh to some people, she has now raised 5 children who have good manners and always say please and thank you.

A Bunch Of Humbugs

Don't worry, I have started this rambling nonsense for a reason, I was fortunate enough to stay in a beautiful hotel in Cornwall over the Christmas period, The Penventon Park Hotel, I stayed there with my wife (who is also polite and well mannered) on the 24th, 25th and 26th of December. And I want to point out that all of the staff were wonderful and amazing, they could not have been more friendly, polite and kind, nothing was too much trouble for anyone.

However, the same cannot be said for the majority of the guests, I have never come across such a rude and bad mannered bunch of ungrateful, mean-spirited snobs in my entire life! From the moment we stepped in and the woman in front let the door slam in my face, we knew we were in for a treat.

And it certainly didn't stop there, we would smile and say hello to the people that we passed in the hotel corridors, nothing, not even a smile in return. But ever the optimists, my wife and I kept saying good morning or smiling, to no avail. And the rudeness of the guests did not stop at the young lesbian couple, oh no, the staff bore the brunt of the lack of upbringing of the guests. The wait staff in the restaurant were wonderful, attentive and cheerful, even on Christmas day, when all they probably wanted to do was go home to their families. But most of the guests, and by most I mean around 90% did not even look up from their table when they served them, and I heard a thank you from 3 people!

One rude customer, and if he is reading I hope he knows who he is was asked if he had finished his starter because his knife and fork were together (which I am fairly sure is restaurant code for "finished") and when the wait staff asked him if he was finished his reply was a "well, no, obviously not"

No Manners And No Respect

Things like this make me so angry, why do some people think that they don't have to be polite to others? I don't care who you are, or who they are, it doesn't matter if they are house keeping staff at a hotel or the Queen of England, they are a human being and human beings deserve some respect.

Whenever I hear someone being rude, my first thought is always "who raised you?" and would they be impressed if they heard you talking to another human being like that? Were you raised to have manners? And do rude people annoy you as much as they annoy me?


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    • Claire-louise profile imageAUTHOR

      Claire Raymond 

      11 months ago from UK

      Devika Primić I think you are right, it is a parent's duty to teach their children to be well mannered.

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 

      11 months ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      People who are rude fail to apply their goodness to others I see that so often and wonder what happened in society. Some times parents just fail their duties or children are lacking love. It has a lot to do with culture.

    • Glenis Rix profile image


      12 months ago from UK

      I don’t have religious beliefs either though I was sent to Sunday school as a child and attended Church of England primary school. But may be something needs to take the void that was once occupied in Western European society by religion. The question is - What?

    • Claire-louise profile imageAUTHOR

      Claire Raymond 

      12 months ago from UK

      I don't blame you, I was right up on mine! As a non religious person I couldn't comment on the Sunday school or church thing.

      But I do have to agree about the occupied parents thing, people don't want to discipline their children anymore as they don't want to be seen as the bad guy.

    • Claire-louise profile imageAUTHOR

      Claire Raymond 

      12 months ago from UK

      That's fair enough, I have only been twice, but everyone was quite friendly.

    • Claire-louise profile imageAUTHOR

      Claire Raymond 

      12 months ago from UK

      I don't think they do Louise, mine did too, I can't stand people who chew with their mouth open!

    • Glenis Rix profile image


      12 months ago from UK

      Well, Claire, you have tempted me up onto my soap box.

      We should be careful not to generalise but I can sympathise with a view that civilised society is collapsing. Not everyone is rude, Claire,though out and about on the streets in England it is easy to see that many people, often young in comparison with my generation ( I’m a senior citizen) appear to have a total disresgard for others. The reasons, I believe, are complex.

      Good manners and respect for the feelings of other people ought to be taught in the home, but all to often parents fall short in this aspect of parenting. Sadly, many children are not parented - they are left to navigate their own path in society whilst the adults who are supposed to guide them are otherwise occupied.

      Few people attend Church or Sunday school nowadays - where once upon a time the values embodied in the Ten Commandments would have been learned.

      So, in the absence of moral guidance in the home or in Church, it is left to schools to attempt inculcate self discipline and good manners into pupils - but some parents wilfully undermine the authority of teachers to fulfil this function.

      Television and film are censored far less stringently than in the past, both by the official censor and by parents, so the behaviour and foul language frequently depicted have been absorbed into society to the extent that they are seen as normal by many who have been deprived of a moral compass.

      Add to all this the hopelessness and stresses of of unemployment, benefits dependency and poverty brought about in our post-industrial country by advanced technology and a globalised economy and it becomes easy to understand why many people are rude. Many must feel that there is no reward on Earth or in Heaven and are consequently disaffected and angry. The ‘advances’ brought about in the late twentieth century also created a raft of societal problems.

    • Kenna McHugh profile image

      Kenna McHugh 

      12 months ago from Northern California

      I think it depends on where you live. Scotland is so nice and mannerly. You visit there and they treat you like a next of kin.

    • Coffeequeeen profile image

      Louise Powles 

      12 months ago from Norfolk, England

      I have to agree, people don't seem to have any manners nowadays, do they? My parents always brought me up to say please and thankyou, and always eat proper at the table too.


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