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Why People Could Take an Instant Dislike to You

Updated on July 16, 2017
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Compu-smart has a wide range of knowledge and wisdom and loves to write about the subjects he feels passionate about.

You may not realize or even believe that people can take an instant dislike to you just from your very first meeting and without even knowing you. This can even border on hatred for many reasons including personal appearance or people's phobias. Sometimes people may even tarnish your character through gossip, false rumors or outright slander. Also, some people may simply be incompatible with you, which could relate to the star sign you are!

After reading this handy guide. you'll wonder no more why someone may act weird toward you and you will perhaps learn to get over it and realize it's just a fact of life.

Author's Note: I was inspired to write the following article after observing several incidents that caused me to wonder why people could be incredibly nasty to people they don't know for no apparent reason. On one occasion while traveling on a train I overheard a gentleman say to his companion, "I can't stand her." Shortly afterward he added, "I've never met her." I was astounded. On another occasion, while riding on a bus, I was puzzled by the behavior of two girls on the bus who saw some young and old men and women on the street and laughed at them mockingly without saying a word. I was puzzled. Finally. an old acquaintance verbally attacked nearly everyone who passed by as we waited for a bus. I was stunned. The insults he flung at people he did not know we so brutal that I was compelled to try to find out why people behave in such an unreasonable fashion.

People will dislike you purely because of their phobias

  • Alliumphobia: Fear of anything relating to garlic.
  • Coulrophobia: Fear of the look of clowns.
  • Peladophobia: Fear of baldheaded people.
  • Pogonophobia: Fear of people with beards.
  • Sociophobia: Fear of people or society in general.
  • Xenophobia: Fear of strangers or foreigners.
  • All Phobias listed at wikipedia.

Kendra Zebra Explaining Why People May Dislike Her

Things That Make People Hate You

After a considerable amount of time, I studiously worked out why people may take an instant dislike to you. I accomplished this by asking everybody I know, young or old, as well as strangers I bumped into and people in online chat rooms who were brutally honest with their answers to my question. Here's what I asked them: What reasons can you give me as to why you would take an instant dislike to someone you have seen for the first time? A consensus of their answers appears below in no particular order. Note: Each of the reasons cited were given at least once.

Appearances: The clothing you choose to wear and how you wear them. For example: guys wearing their jeans and trousers too low, exposing their briefs. Women with low cut tops that reveal too much fat or clothing that reveals stretch marks on their tummy and hairy legs. Not wearing the right shoes (just the left ones), having a weird haircut or having a challenging look. Facial piercings or too much facial or body hair. Some people mentioned their dislike for the 'greedy rich', while others expressed their antipathy for the poor.

Color of skin/race: It's a sad fact, racism is still rife. Some people will take an instant dislike to you purely because of the color or your skin, the language you speak, or due to the country you come from.

Looking like someone else: You might even look similar to a person that they already dislike, then you'll have your work cut out just to get on.

Your gender: Unfortunately in this day an age too many people are still homophobic. Homophobic people used the words "queers" and "fagots" to describe homosexuals. Some people said they hated gay people who "act too gay," or "looked too gay".

Religious Beliefs. Some people hate those who wear religious attire. From Burkas to veils which cover the face. How could someone hate someone without even seeing their face!?

In addition to asking why people might take an Instant dislike of you, I also asked this: "If you had no bad feelings about someone you've just met, what would make you dislike them once you engaged them in conversation and have become better acquainted".

Here's a sample of the answers they cited:
Bad breath and/or body odors were often mentioned. Other reasons cited were people whose mouth sprays out spittle when they talk. Others mentioned that they dislike some people not so much for what they said but for "how they said it".

Disagreements arising from allegiance to different sports teams, political views and personal values can cause hatred.

What Nick Abbot Said....

During a LBC Radio show, the presenter Nick Abbot said the following, and has said repeatedly during most of his shows......

"Everyone hates everyone. If they don't dress like you, look like you, talk like you, or have different views than you, then you're not going to like them"!

The thing that surprised me about that comment was no-one who called into the show disagreed with him.

So now you know it could be any one of many reasons why someone may take a dislike to you especially without you ever meeting properly. You can try to persevere through outright prejudice in the hope that this barrier to friendship may be overcome in time. Unfortunately, sometimes, with some people, there is little hope!.

You can please some of the people all of the time, but you can't please everyone all of the time. At the end of the day we will constantly encounter other people's judgment and prejudices; let's not add our own into the mix.

What people like or dislike is an important part of our personality and character. Sometimes it could be peoples natural 'aura' or 'chemistry' as to why they don't get along. Nothing can be done about that.

Do you instinctively dislike people?. What reasons could you give? Please share your views and opinions in the comments section to help others understand why people hate so much.

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See results

© 2012 compu-smart

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      kitty 6 weeks ago

      I have people give me dirty looks or sneer at me even when just walking past. I've had people who are with me even comment on how most people give me dirty looks. I also have people take an instant dislike to me when meeting me. I am different. I look a little different I guess. I've been told by a Dr that I just have an aura about me that is confronting. I'm not an angry person or nasty. I smile, try to be friendly however after years of people not reacting positively towards me I have become self conscious and now feel awkward when I'm out. Funny enough I excel at sales work and public speaking. People respond to me differently in that situation and I have continually exceeded top records when working. I can't work it out but I can tell you I've tried everything to fit in and I just don't. It has really affected my self esteem. I'd rather not go out at all nowdays.

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      Sanxuary 2 years ago

      You listed a lot of discriminatory reasons but there are a lot of other reasons. Social Status, Lack of Social Norms within a group, Personality Conflicts a big one, Personal Profile its self, Personal Beliefs, In cognitive predisposition of a person, I for example hate dishonest people and drama lovers I tend to stay a way from. You would think that these things would be hard to determine but its not to hard to figure out. Most of these things can be used in team building and are less negative when you recognize them. A people person can be a great sales person, just do not put to such people together or they will talk about work all day and get nothing done. If your boss is one and you our a numbers person you better be good at making your own plans to meet your job requirements. In most cases its not about hate but understanding yourself and others.

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      3 years ago

      I hate people who hates me without reason :d

    • CraftytotheCore profile image

      CraftytotheCore 3 years ago

      This is such an interesting Hub and I love how you had the curiosity which resulted in writing this. There have been a few people that I have never met, but just at the sight of them I know I would not get along with them. I can't explain it. It's definitely my personality. I'm a quiet easy going person, but I'm also outgoing in certain areas.

    • profile image

      Jack 3 years ago

      I cannot stand and to the point of hating girls, woman who have there hair in dreadlocks, it's so uncool and looks filthy and is probably filthy as they don't even wash it,,grrrrr

    • profile image

      fcuk_u_all 4 years ago

      i hate anyone who talks down to me. Who think they are better than me or anyone. i hate people who think they are the dogs bollocks, those people who think just because they have more money than others they are so great but guess what poor poor you. i hate it when forenhners come to my country and do not want to obey our laws. i hate you all and if i ever get the chance to smash your faces in i will.

    • profile image

      h8er 4 years ago

      I hate disrespectful, unreliable, untrustworthy, selfish, greedy, inconsiderate rude people.

      All the above costs NOTHING!!

    • profile image

      doctor lechi/leki 4 years ago

      i hate my patients who arrive late. I hate my patients who do not listen to my advice. i my hate patients who think they know better than me. i hate my patients who do not embrace chinese medicine and continue their western ways.

      Dr Lecki/Leki. Bedford hill practice, balham. London, sw12.

    • profile image

      Ann Omynus 5 years ago

      Why do people hate me? That WAS my previous and ignorant thoughts.

      My thoughts have now become obvious. they don't hate me at all, it's just pure jealousy.

    • profile image

      Ausseye 5 years ago

      Hi C Smart:

      I hope that we can get over our own individual shortcoming

      That drive our hate

      Good hub for thought and inspiration for better.

    • profile image

      litlestarr 5 years ago

      one thing that annoys me is someone that tells me their tragic life story in the 1st few minutes I meet them.

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      john 5 years ago

      I was at a party recently and a nice girl was paying me a lot of attention. Until, I revealed my star sign. Unfortunately it happened to be the same as her previous two boyfriends that ended badly.

      From that point on-wards, she closed up and I can only guess that she ignorant of the fact that I am an individual in my own right. The next morning I was pissed off about it but I eventually realised that she had a lot of problems that she hadn't addressed yet. Probably preferring to live in denial than face the issues that my star sign (in this case) would remind her of.

      I like the quote by Benjamin Disreali along the lines of

      Don't complain and don't make excuses. Your enemies won't believe you and your friend already understand.

      Sometimes not ending up with someone is a blessing,

      remembering that I'd rather be single than poorly matched.

      Enjoy the journey. . . .