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Words Will Never Harm Me

Updated on April 21, 2012

Wordsworth by: Carlos Gomez

Name Calling

Everyone has been abused by name calling at one time or another. Unfortunately, it was not seen as a problem for the longest time. In many cases people still don't view it this way.

You are a "sissy" if you can't take a little name calling! Even as you are being told that it is not hurtful they are trying to hurt you with a phrase such as the one here. The whole intention of name calling is to hurt. To make that person feel as if they are less somehow.

This is a form of abuse! You call your child stupid they will begin to think they are stupid. You tell them they are ugly they think they are. Tell them they will amount to nothing, they strive for it.

Sticks and Stones

Sticks and stones

May break my bones

But words will never hurt me

Children's Nursery Rhyme?

This was a children's nursery rhyme, taught to them by adults trying to convince them that name calling was not hurtful as physical assaults were. Little did they realize the damaging impact words can have.

According to Wikipedia the phrase has been around from as early as 1872.

A quote from Wikipedia:

"This sentiment is reflected in the common law of civil assault, which holds that mere name-calling does not give rise to a cause of action, while putting someone in fear of physical violence does."

Verbal Abuse

Verbal abuse can and often is just as, or even worse than physical abuse. Words have a tremendous power. I am certain anyone who has been abused will agree that verbal abuse is nothing to ignore. Many times verbal abuse is just the beginning, then physical abuse follows.

"He didn't mean it! He just gets angry sometimes."

I felt my heart sink when my grandson told me that people just get angry sometimes. I told him that is true but that we should learn to control it and we should never hurt anyone because of it. I hate to think his father's family is abusing him this way.

He went around calling people dum dum for awhile and I told him it was not nice that he could hurt people's feelings. He told me his dad called him that. I told him to tell his daddy that he was not a dum dum. I also told him that he is very smart and that his dad should not call him names.

Often the words are a trigger for physical violence. I would bet that you could come up with a few words that you think could set someone's soul aflame. Causing them to want to fight or lash out at you. Some words have such a degrading connotation that people would kill anyone who dared speak them. Carlos Gomez gives some really good examples in the video above.

The Power of Words

Words can be used in a positive way also. You can encourage someone to reach higher and further than they thought they could ever reach. To be happier and more fulfilled than they ever thought they could be. This is the reason prayer is so powerful. Reenforcing positive with words over and over in your mind. Some believe if spoken out-loud the words carry on the wind to uplift others.

You don't have to believe in a religion or a god, prayer can work for anyone. It is the words and what they stand for. If you look out your window and tell yourself it is a beautiful day, chances are you are going to have a good day. If you look out the window and feel depressed because it's raining you may end up with a pretty gloomy day.

The power of words in my life has been very painful at times and very wonderful at other times. My mother's words each night when she tucked me in bed, have given me a joyful feeling all of my life. Even now that she is gone when I hear or say these words, "May God bless you and keep you safe, always."

Then there are the painful ones. One I remember too well, were the words spoken by a girl on the school bus when we were in 1st or 2nd grade. She sang out loudly, "Strand's are rich but they never spend their money." Although, I have forgiven the girl who sang the words I think of how sad it is that parents would teach her such mean things.

This was all because of people being misinformed. Many people such as her parents thought that because there were eleven children in the family that my mother would be getting assistance from the government for all of us. If they had done their research they would have known that only three children can draw at a time. Either way the words made me more aware of the hand-me-downs I had to wear and somehow felt like I was so much less than anyone else. I felt as though, no one liked me, I was an outcast.

You Have My Word

There was a time when receipts were not necessary. A person would give their word that they would return to pay. If their word had proven to be so they would be trusted on their word from then on. If of course the person showed they were untrustworthy, they would not receive credit anymore.

A handshake and a promise could go a long way if the person were honest and meant what they said when they gave their word. Unfortunately, we have learned not to trust and that words are meaningless over the years, as people speak them but think of them as nothing.

Promises

When someone promises or vows to love and cherish someone until they die. It should not be taken lightly. It should not be thought of as a temporary agreement. So many people marry today with the thought in the back of their minds that if they don't like it in the future they will just divorce.

"But I gave my word!! When I give my word I stand by it!" If necessary you may have to get up in the morning and remind yourself why you married this person. Why they were important enough to you that you would commit your life to them. Thinking about the positive times, the good times can almost bring back that old feeling. Keeping your thoughts and words appraising will make a stronger relationship. Degrading thoughts and words will tear it apart.

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    • Dardia profile imageAUTHOR

      Darlene Yager 

      6 years ago from Michigan

      Hi Nell,

      I am certain we all have had a bit of bullying. It is a shame that it goes on. Thanks for stopping by, for the comment, and the rating.

    • Nell Rose profile image

      Nell Rose 

      6 years ago from England

      Hi, I remember them well, I was really abused at school physical and mental bullying, they say that words are the most powerful thing you can use, and it is true, most of the people who treat others like this are usually low esteem themselves, but that doesn't make any excuses, very true hub, rated up! cheers nell

    • Dardia profile imageAUTHOR

      Darlene Yager 

      6 years ago from Michigan

      Cardisa, nice of you to stop by.

      I agree you can chose to let it make you or break you but you need to learn such behavior somewhere. So, if you have no one with a good example to follow, you may only learn to be beaten. I know even with my mother's strength it was difficult for me to rise above the abuses I lived with, and compared to so many others mine were mild. I was unable to gather the strength to overcome until I was well into my twenties.

      There is also the fun teasing and name calling that is a show of affection which is a positive thing, such as what goes on between you and your fiance, I would imagine.

    • Cardisa profile image

      Carolee Samuda 

      6 years ago from Jamaica

      Words are life, they make or break you. I strongly believe that, but we also chose what makes or breaks us. Our strength can overcome the strongest abuses.

      I only allow my fiance to call me names and those are usually for teasing me. Anyone else who tries that will get an earful.

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