The phrase "first lady" isn't a title, it's just a customary honor. A similar phrase for a president's husband, or male partner, or whatever it turns out to be in the fullness of time will no doubt be flashed by the media, and it will be just as silly, pompous and pretentious as the present one.
A number of president's wives haven't been ladies atall, merely pro forma alleged ones. Few presidents have been gentlemen. We should stop awarding fake titles altogether, especially those that don't fit. After all, this is supposed to be a democratic nation the federal government of which has a chief executive officer who is just another citizen chosen temporarily to enforce the laws.