Always an extremely honest, open and upfront person, "truth," as I view it, is first and foremost. There is no reason why an intelligent, mature and diplomatic person cannot be truthful as well as nice.
No matter our words or actions, it is the perception of the "other" person that determines their translation and reaction in the end anyway. Don't you think? I do.
I believe every individual has had an experience or two where they have chosen their words carefully and delivered a message most kindly......but the receiver took serious offense. The opposite can be observed as well. Someone may be very nasty or cruel in relating a message or asking a question....and the receiver has little or no reaction whatsoever. He/she simply does not allow these things to disturb them.
It requires a bit of thoughtfulness to deliver the hard core truth of a matter and yet do it with compassion for a person's emotions. It can be done.
A lie...or even simply dancing around the truth (which is also a form of deception) is not acceptable. Lies are always uncovered sooner or later. Liars are not believed nor respected in the long haul. Eventually liars lose credibility and are no longer "trusted."
We also have a choice to remain silent......not a bad idea sometimes. I would suggest that anyone who cannot be "truthful" as well as "nice".....simply reserve comment.
I say all of this assuming we are not discussing heated arguments or hostile issues. Under those circumstances, words and attitudes are not controlled and few people use discretion......I think that's why we call them "FIGHTS." Fights are part of life. Hopefully apologies and peace follow................Good question, Sundeep.