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The measure of a good man

Updated on January 30, 2011

I once knew a boy that grew up in a family of four girls and one brother, Mom and Dad and grandma. This family had some hard times,struggled a lot but somehow were able to make ends meet. This boy was the oldest of the two brothers and there was always something special about him. Even as a child he had way's like an old soul, he was so loving and caring and took everything to heart, he really cared about people especially his family. He was the neatest person I think I have ever met, besides his Mother, I mean he kept a house better then any women. The family was really going through hard times and so just before this young man's 17th birthday he enlisted in the United States Army to help his family, his plan was to make enough money to send home so that he could make life eaiser for his family and that is exactly what he did. It was hard for him I,m sure being so young and going into the Army,leaving home and all that was familiar to him. I really admired him for that, he stayed in about four years and then he came home with a wife. For some reason he just did not want to leave and go back and as much as his mother and father tried to talk him into doing so to avoid a dishonarable discharge he was not hearing it. Well he stayed home he and his wife and they had a beautiful baby boy, set up house he got a job and for a while all was well. The marriage did not last to long but they did have another baby a little girl. Soon after the seperation this young man began to see other people and was not using his better judgement and had some kids outside of his marriage. Divorce was soon to follow, but one thing I do admire about this young man was that he took care of all of his children, not just with money but with his time, he would have them as much as he could. Eventually his ex left and moved to another state and this young man took his first two children and raised them without her, that is how she wanted it. These children grew up knowing one another, and they developed a wonderful relationship with their Dad and I just thought this is good , this is how it should be. As was his character he kept a job, good paying jobs and just like he was so meticulous about everything else in his life he was the same way on his job. whatever he did he gave it a hundred and ten percent. He had a burden for his family, by now his Mom and Dad had seperated and he loved his Mom and would do anything to make life easy for her, he also loved his sisters and even though they had lives and families of their own he was always there if they needed him. Being that there were only two boy's in this family he and his brother were very close. Eventually he met and married his second wife and things were good for awhile, they became a blended family and bought a home and all was well. The marriage was soon in trouble and he was heartbroken and did everything he could to try to keep his family together to no avail, my heart broke for this young man because I knew how much famiyl meant to him. He began to go to Church and he and his wife tried to make another go of their marriage, it worked for a while but not for very long. About this time his youngest daughters Mom, whom he fathered when he and his first wife split up decided to go after him for child support, now normally I would think ok, why not she has every right to get help with this child, but this young man saw this little girl almost every week, kept her during the summer, winter vacations, gave her money, bought her nice things, was always supportive from day one, so he just could not understand nor anyone that knew him why she would do this. Now he is in court for child support, hit with a felony because they said he was a dead beat dad.Wow what a blow,things just went from bad to worse after this and their were court appearences, and he lost his job, now he had a record and had to report to a probation officer...this young man's life was turned up side down, and I saw the very life drain from him, but he tried to hold on. He tried to no avail to find a job, but because of the felony that was now on his record no one wanted to hire him and he eventually lost his house, and his car, by this time the children are young adults and pretty much went their own way's. While all of this is going on he is still seeing this daughter that he is being accused of not taking care of,still got her on the weekends, took her shopping when he could and still loved her just as much as ever. After he lost his home he moved in with family and he was so sad and so lost. During the summer months he manicured everybodys lawns and did what ever he had to do to keep himself busy, if one of his sister's or his brother was facing a crisis you would think it was happening to him, he would do whatever he could to try to make things better. I noticed one day that his eye's looked funney, kind of yellow, and then as time went on they started to look red, I became concerned and asked him if he was feeling ok, and he never liked hospitials or doctors, his dad passed away from heart failure, then his mother from cancer so he just did not like the atmosphere. One day I recieved a call saying he was ill and was in the emergency room at a local hospital, well of course his siters and his brother were right there by his side. High blood pressure the doctor said you have got to take better care of yourself and try not to be so stressed. Well because he could not find a job, and because he has to stay with relativies it just took a toll on him. This mother one day suddenly had a change of heart and dropped the child support charges, to little to late. The charges were dropped, but they would not remove the felony charge from his record, a good, hard working man in his late forties now has a felony on his record and cannot find a decent job. No medical insurance, could not get medication for his high blood pressure so it was just out of control. I recieved a call a few nights ago and I was told that this gentle man had been rushed to the hospital suffring from a heart attack. Now fifty and stripped from being a man, not being able to work as he was accustomed to doing, seperated from his family, was I think more then he could bear. What is the measure of a man, how can the government just strip one of all pride and dignity, But I am so glad that God is in the restoration business, I believe that this man will be restored and all will be well. I am so proud to say that this man is my younger brother whom I love and admire, He is the measure of a good man.



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