- Gender and Relationships
Facing the Demon of Loneliness
Every human on the planet experiences loneliness from time to time. We are social creatures and when we are separated from others, particularly as a single person, loneliness can creep in. Satan uses this to undermine our relationship with God which can break down not only our connection to Him, but destroy our Godly esteem as well. So, how can you combat loneliness? These steps can bring you back to where you need to be.
Admit that you are lonely.
It can be difficult to admit that you are lonely. Some people feel that an admission to feelings of loneliness makes them seem weak, but this is not true. Accept it for what it is and you can begin to tackle the problem and escape.
Identify the cause of your loneliness.
Are you single and have been unable to find a partner? Are you divorced? Widowed? Why are you feeling lonely?
Accept what you can't change.
There are some things that you simply cannot change, no matter what you try. The death of a spouse, for example, can't be changed. If you love someone and they don't love you back is something that typically can't be changed. You just cannot make someone love you.
Change what you can.
What aspects of your situation can you change? Can you become more social or develop better, healthier self esteem? Perhaps you can become more involved in your church or volunteer somewhere. If you are having trouble meeting people, join a Christian singles group or find ways to fellowship with other Christian singles.
Realize that you can't derive your happiness from other people or situations.
People can't make you happy, only God can make you happy. Realize that you could get into a relationship, even get married, and still be lonely. Once you learn to look to God for your source of joy, you can begin to reach out to others without depending on them to relieve you of your loneliness, sadness and depression.
Get a pet.
If you can, get a pet. They are fantastic companions. Dogs, of course are great to have around, but if you are not home much, a cat may be a better option. Cats don't require a lot of interaction and they can pretty much take care of themselves as long as you provide plenty of fresh water and food. There are other options from which you can choose as well. Visit your local pet store or animal shelter and explore the possibilities.
Expand your social circle.
Making some new friends can help you keep busy and chase away loneliness. If you are occupied and not overcome with loneliness, you won't make relationship choices based on or driven by your loneliness.
Work on yourself.
Do things to improve yourself. Take a class, read your Bible more, pray more, learn a hobby or skill. When you feel better about yourself and value yourself more, you won't be so inclined to latch on to the first person who shows interest in you.
God never intended for us to be lonely, but He can use times of loneliness as an opportunity to expose you to situations that will lead you into a deeper relationship with Him. If you are feeling lonely, ask God to use it, to guide you and you will find that the loneliness melts away.