- Gender and Relationships
A Few Romantic Gestures Your Man Will Love
Get the love on!
Women love attention, especially if it's from our significant other. But how do we give it back? While some women wear the pants in the relationship, others prefer to play follow-the-leader. This kind of behavioral difference will help determine the kind of affection you should return when your boyfriend (or husband) wants your lovin'.
Consider your role.
What do you do to help the relationship thrive? Are you the bread-winner? The housemaid (or, if married, the housewife)? The grocery-getter? The laundromat? The lover? The future-planner? The shepherd? There are numerous roles we women play, and sometimes we play more than one. We're amazing actresses that way.
If your role is more domestic, continue reading from here to get the inside scoop on the Keeper of the Castle. If it's the opposite way around, scroll down to the Money-Maker section. And if you're both, go to Double Trouble.
BUT! Before you continue, read this bit to help you determine just which section you should be reading.
- Keeper of the Castle: You stay at home and clean, do laundry, entertain guests, and make sure your place is presentable. You like to have dinner ready for your man when he gets home. You're the one who goes over the bills at the end of the month, since he's busy with work, and make sure things are paid on time (this part can be included in the other categories, but mostly the stay-at-home-er pulls the strings). It's usually you who gets the groceries and house supplies.
- Money-Maker: You're the one making sure there's enough money in the bank to pay off the bills. You have a full-time (or two part time) job(s) and are sometimes home late because of business meetings or overtime. You like to plan ahead and make sure you're both financially secure, but you leave most of the domestic blahblahblah up to him, such as groceries and cleaning. It's just not your thing.
- Double Trouble: This doesn't imply that there will definitely be trouble, but that it's not easy to play Housemaid and Financer at the same time. Both of you share the responsibilities; you both do some cleaning, some cooking, some work, some laundry, some groceries, and so on. Domestic equality's a key in your relationship. You share the bill-paying and the future planning, and both of you go shopping for the things you need.
Keeper of the Castle
He just got home from work, and you've slaved the day away cleaning and cooking and preparing everything. Right about now, he doesn't care what you do, as long as he's getting your attention. After all, if he didn't want your attention, he wouldn't be coming home to you. You've got a million options to give him what he wants, but here are 5 little things you can do for him.
- Tell him you've been thinking of him all day. It's an ego-boost and it makes him feel special. If that's not enough, show him this is true by having his favorite dinner prepared, with candles and a small bouqet of roses. Men don't like roses, you say? Then why the heck would they put them on the table for us? It's not just for our eyes. It adds a sense of romance to the meal, making it feel more intimate. Guys aren't always shallow, ladies. By making this small gesture for him, it lets him know that you really have been thinking about him, and you want nothing more than to be with just him tonight.
- Have a romantic movie night planned. While guys whine and whine about all the kissy-gushy stuff, they do happen to enjoy that kind of thing. They're not going to admit that, though. In case he asks why you picked romance movies, tell him they're your favorites, even if they're really his (in secret; they don't always like to admit they have a soft side). Maybe have a bowl of popcorn already in the microwave, or a bowl of fruit set out in front of the couch. It's a sign of sharing, something every relationship needs.
- Pamper him. Yes, my fellow females, men do like to be pampered once in a while! It's just another thing they're not going to admit out loud. Try giving him a little neck massage and see where it goes. Or tell him you'll prepare a nice bath for him. You can always join him later. ;-)
- Have a CD or iPod playlist of soft, romantic music playing. Mood really is everything, and if they're into it, they'll relax and enjoy themselves. It might help to dim the lights, or have just candles lit. You could even meet him at the door in your sexy lingere or a little bathrobe. It may sound corny and demeaning, but when he looks at you like you're the only woman in the world he'll ever want to be with, it sure doesn't feel demeaning.
- Leave short, sweet love notes scattered for him to find. You can do this on notepad paper, sticky-notes, or lipstick on the bathroom mirror. I don't suggest the lipstick, though; it's not much fun to clean up. When he finds the notes, he'll be reminded of how much you care about him. It'll really make his day.
You're tired. Your feet hurt. You just want to sit down and vegetate on the couch. But he wants your attention. What can you do to make him feel loved?
This category's a little harder to do, since you're not home all day to plan fun, sweet things for him. But if you take a little time out of your busy schedule, you can come up with a number of ways to show you're working your tail off for him.
- Bring home dinner from one of his favorite restaurants. Make sure he's not planning to cook for you two tonight first, though, so he doesn't have to slave over a hot stove all afternoon just to discover you've brought food home for him. If that's not within your budget, see if you can get out of the office early and cook something for him for a change. He'll think you got out just for him (which you did), and that'll make him feel important your life.
- Send him an email in the middle of the day. Write something sweet in it, and send it around the time he usually checks his emails. When he reads it, he might call you and tell you how much it meant to him, or he might just do something special for you in return.
- Call him and tell him you have a surprise. But don't tell him what it is yet! I'll leave this part up to you, though. I don't know what your man likes for surprises. But I do know that mine likes to discover I've worn his favorite lingere under my clothes, just for his delight. It doesn't have to be something dirty, mind you; it could be anything.
- Tell him to meet you somewhere. It could be his favorite restaurant, or a bowling alley (if he likes bowling), or even a movie theater. Once he arrives, tell him it's a date. Even if they're married, men like going on dates with their girls. By taking him out, it shows you aren't afraid to be out in public with him, and that you want everyone to know just how amazing your man is. It's kind of like displaying your arm-candy. But in this way, he'll feel like you're proud to show him off because he's such a wonderful person, not because he's just a hunk-o-meat (even if he is super hott).
- Meet up on your lunch break. It makes you feel special because he's supporting your career, and it makes him feel special because you're spending time with him, even though you're busy. It's a win-win situation, girls!
You're both exhausted after a long day of work. Neither of you are really in the mood to do anything, but you can tell he wants some romantic attention. This one's probably the easiest category, because you can do anything from the other two, and even add a few other fun things to your arsenal of love.
- Walk home together. Does he work near you? If not, you guys could catch a bus and meet up at an equadistant stop. You can hold hands, cuddle, and talk about your day the entire way home. You'll both feel secure in your relationship, and you'll really be able to connect on the walk home.
- Plan a game night. Twister's always a fun game to play, but if you're not a flexible person, go for a simple board game you both enjoy. It'll help you two relax together, and it's a great morale boost to spend quality time together. He'll really appreciate this.
- Stop by his work if you get off early, and you know he's still there. For one thing, it implies that you care about the effort he's making to keep you two afloat. For another, it'll reassure him of the love you share. This shows that you are interested in his work and what he does, and it makes him feel your relationship's strong through your support. He might just do the same thing for you.
- Have dinner together. You don't have to cook it if you don't want to, but it's a good way to spend quality time together. But don't just flop down in front of the boob-tube with your frozen dinners, either. Eat at the dining table. It makes it harder for your attention to be distracted from each other, and it makes him think you want to spend time with just him.
- Plan a day off together. You can go anywhere, do anything. You could have a picnic in the park. You could just stroll about town. You could have a day in the house, just the two of you. ;-) Find something you both enjoy, and do it!
Thank me later.
If these ideas didn't help, I don't know what to tell you. But, if they did, I'm glad. I'm writing this for YOU, after all!
Have a few more romantic ideas I didn't mention? Feel free to leave them in a comment for everyone to see!
From top to bottom, formatted picture - website:
- http://www1.istockphoto.com/file_thumbview_approve/5759417/2/istockphoto_5759417-secret-recipe-housewife.jpg - http://www.istockphoto.com/file_closeup/people/5759417-secret-recipe-housewife.php?id=5759417
- http://www.bradfitzpatrick.com/store/images/products/thumbs/pc004-cart-business-woman.jpg - http://www.bradfitzpatrick.com/store/catalog/Cartoon_Clipart-9-6.html
- http://www.fotosearch.com/comp/IMZ/IMZ130/working-woman_~sca0141.jpg - www.fotosearch.com/IMZ130/sca0141/
- http://www.smh.com.au/ffximage/2007/08/22/cmHOUSEWIFE_ARTICLE_narrowweb__300x443,0.jpg - http://www.smh.com.au/news/house--home/how-to-pass-the-whiteglove-test/2007/08/14/1186857515188.html
- http://www.stuff.co.nz/blogs/wp-content/uploads/2007/07/working-woman-with-bag.jpg - http://www.stuff.co.nz/blogs/lifeatwork/2007/07/31/the-working-mum-tough-issue-or-corporate-opportunity/
- http://images.inmagine.com/img/photoalto/paa105/paa105000042.jpg - www.inmagine.com/paa105/paa105000042-photo
- http://www.crystalhips.co.uk/HappyCouple.jpg - www.crystalhips.co.uk/
Thanks to Google Images. Seriously, that thing is my life-floatie.