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10 Things All Women Should Do, Prior to Getting Married
Calling all the SINGLE LADIES!!!
This Hub is dedicated to all the single ladies! I was lucky enough to have an older sister, that made sure I experienced most of the items listed! I hope that some lucky young lady stumbles upon this "manual" and smiles, checks off a few things and understands that she (NOT society) is in control of her life!
#1 Master THIS!
Education is so important. I firmly believe that all women, that can (yes, we know that college isn't for everyone)- should definitely experience college life! As a mother of three daughters and one son, I tell my daughters that they should acquire at minimum- a bachelor's degree before they consider making me a grandma! I would LOVE for them to obtain their Master's degree PRIOR to settling down. It's a known fact that once we say I do, SOME (not all) of us get the baby bug, and want to start having children. While having children is wonderful, having them while working on a Master's degree, cleaning a house, cooking, nursing, finding time for your husband- let alone yourself, can often be overwhelming! Now, I'm not saying that it CAN'T be done, because I know super mom's that have done it all- even completing a doctoral degree. I'm just saying... IF you can do this prior to getting married... that would be great!
#2 The Get-A-Way
Hopefully, while attending your University, or working your long-time job, you've come across a great group of girlfriends. Some women are actually lucky enough to have had the SAME group of friends from High School, Middle School and even Kindergarten (yes, I know a few of them!) Once you've been lucky enough to find and keep these girls in your life, it's time to PLAN! Yes, plan the ULTIMATE escape! This should be a GIRLS only trip (no boyfriends, male friends, brothers, fiancée's or love interests) just a bunch of girls overwhelmed with life, looking to break free! I suggest an all inclusive resort, somewhere in the Caribbean, where the sand is white and the water is blue! Take a lot of pictures, and by all means, blackmail pictures are great memories to share between friends!
#3 Equal Opportunity Dating
Now, this is a personal choice, and I'm glad that I experienced it. I think that every woman should date, or (if that word is too strong for you) get to know a man outside of your "usual" comfort zone. Perhaps you're Christian, and would NEVER date someone within the Hindu faith? Well, think again. It's just a date! And you're only getting to know someone. Go in a group if you must, but I think it's so important to know about different cultures and to see people for who they are and not their skin color or religious beliefs. I personally took the time to get to know a guy that was different in race and religion. While we never met one another's families (for OBVIOUS reasons- we were very different and not looking for a long term relationship or for our mother's to have heart attacks!)- but I'm certainly glad that I experienced his culture, and learned about his belief system. We're still in touch on social media, and glad to have met one another.
Have you ever?
Have you ever dated someone outside of your race/religion?
#4 One Bedroom Please
Living on your own is something that everyone should experience... even if it's for just a few months! This time should be spent fully learning about yourself and what you like. Learning how to budget, decorate and structure your day. Test out recipes, host a girls night or experiment with different genre's of music without offending anyone. This should be a solo act, and on your terms only. For those concerned about safety, a gated community, with certain measures of security (be it a door man, camera's or a nosy neighbor) or a friend living within the community, are always great choices, especially within busy areas.
#5 Let's Go Cruising!
By all means, take a cruise! This is one vacation that EVERYONE can appreciate. My sister and I went on one, and it literally changed my life! While girlfriends are ok, sisters are even better! If you happen to be the ONLY child, or only girl, a first cousin will definitely do! Now, I know someone is like: "I get motion sickness," or "I can't swim," or "What if the ship sinks?" Listen, I am the QUEEN of motion sickness. I can't drive down the street without my puke bag... but I made it through the Atlantic and Caribbean Oceans! The pro's: Shopping, endless fun, the excursions, the memories, the docking, the calm waters and multitude of things to do on board. The con's: you'll most likely gain weight. Just remember, there's a spa on board, as well as a gym! Use it at your discretion!
# 6 I Came, I Saw, I Conquered!
Although I'm not big on outdoor activities that require a lot of sweat... I do believe that there are certain activities that help women define themselves! For example, there's a running group called Black Girls Run (BGR) located all throughout the United States. Now, they're not just for Black girls, in fact, they have runners of all ages, sizes and colors- they just have to be female. What I love about this group is that they encourage women to become active, participating in marathons and improving their lifestyles one stride at a time. Women bond with one another and help each other towards their personal goals. Not only does becoming involved in a group activity (hiking, biking, yoga) help you physically, it also pushes you to do your best, encourages competition and allow you to start something and never quit. So, hit the track and go for the gold!
#7 Find Your Passion
This is dedicated to my girlfriend that knew by the age of one, that she wanted to be a doctor! While the rest of us (yes, I'm guilty again) were dreaming of being princesses, or ballerina's- she was sizing up stethoscopes and learning the actual anatomical names for body parts. After several major changes in college, part-time jobs and student-teaching, we somehow learned what our calling for life would be. Through trial and error you've FINALLY stumbled upon something that you would do for free, if you lived in the perfect world! Once you've found out that you're the worlds best up and coming CEO, professor or chemist, take the time that you need to pursue and develop your passion. Be it furthering your education, or re-locating for an unknown opportunity- just DO it! You'll thank yourself in the future!
Just remember, what happens there, stays there! If you're not over the age of twenty-one (like myself, I'll be celebrating my 21st birthday for the thirteenth time this year) you better be planning to celebrate your 21st birthday there! This is the ONE place on earth that you can get away with JUST about anything. In fact, one of my favorite (please, don't judge me) movies takes place there... and the movies title says it all: Very Bad Things! It doesn't matter who you travel with... because 9/10 you'll end up with new friends upon your arrival. Throw in some luxury shopping, celebrity spotting, lack of sleep and excellent restaurants, and you have a recipe for the time of your life- please, try to remember it!
#9 Strange French?
Now, some people tend to think that having a one-night stand is something that everyone should experience. Look, it's 2013. You can't just run around and have random sex with absolute strangers! You need to actually know people before you can even kiss them! Questions need to be answered!!
Are you married? Do you have children? Were you born a man? Have you been to prison? Are you living with your mother? May I see the results of your last doctors visit?
So, I will say pass on the one-night stand... but I will tell you to go out... and flirt! Do this safely, in a public setting, and if you dare to be different... lock lips! BUT.. that's all I'm encouraging!!!
#10 Bon Appetit!
Take a cooking class! Yes ladies... the old saying is true! A way to a man's heart is definitely through his stomach! I encourage all ladies to take a cooking class- preferably one for singles. Not only is this a good way to meet men that can cook (a definite plus), it also serves a purpose! We ALL eat, and it's always a great idea to know how to prepare your own meals! Plus, once you're married, sharing the kitchen with your spouse is a great way to bond. As your family grows, you'll spend massive amounts of time in the kitchen... so become familiar with it now so that you can show off for those family functions!