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7 Things That Will Happen After Being In A Toxic Relationship.

Updated on April 27, 2018
Ashley Marie Rile profile image

Ashley is a 2016 graduate of NVTHS. With a passion for writing, Ashley currently shares her poetry with the world.


When you are in a toxic relationship, you don't understand how much the emotional abuse can really impact you..not while you are in the relationship at least. Toxic relationships are extremely addictive, simply because of the constant back and forth of knowing, and not knowing of what is going to happen. You have a sense of hope that things will eventually change, even though a part of you knows that it won't.

It takes everything in you to not walk away from this type of relationship, and even when you do, you find yourself running back every time. It may be humiliating and embarrassing for you, but it's not your fault. Narcissistic people have a tendency of being very addictive-almost like a drug. When you are in a vulnerable state, it is hard for you to imagine a new life away from that person. It's hard for you to believe that leaving, or moving on could be possible.

You need to trust that he won't hurt you because if you keep pushing him away, he will leave, and it will break you more than you'll ever know.

— Ashley Riley

You Will Expect The Worst

After being in a Toxic relationship, you automatically lose trust for everyone around you, even yourself. You wonder how you were able to tolerate a negative relationship for so long. When you enter new relationships, you find yourself expecting that the new guy that you are with, will hurt you. You feel almost insane because for the longest time, you didn't believe that good men existed. You always looked for the wrong qualities in a man because you didn't value yourself.

You Will Overthink Everything

You believe that everyone has bad intentions, or some negative motive behind them. When you have dated someone in the past that continuously lied to you, you think every man that enters your life will lie. Lies can leave a strong imprint on you. So strong that your judgment for other people, will be similar to the jerk that hurt you. You will make assumptions in your mind and doubt really good men, all because of one person.

You Think That Good Men Will Be "Too Good To Be True"

When you are being treated the way that you should be, it almost feels too good to be true. You walked into the relationship expecting that you were going to be emotionally abused, physically abused, lied too, and cheated on. You expect a horrible ending without some sort of closure. Everyday your new partner will prove to you that he is and will be the same person from the start of the relationship. He has given you no reason the world to not trust him. But it's not him that you don't's anyone who has ever hurt you in the past, that you don't trust. You are just afraid.

You Are Going To Expect Arguments

You are going to expect arguments and fights throughout your new relationship, especially after being hurt in the past. You will expect them to happen until it finally hits you that good people will talk things out with you, rather than giving up on you, or leaving. Healthy relationships are based off of communication, not attacks.

You Will Try To Push Him Away

Someone in the past has damaged you so much, that you don't believe you are worthy of anyone else's love. When someone tries to show you real love, it doesn't feel right to you so you reject it instead. You fear a good relationship because you're afraid of getting attached, and losing it. You don't want to be the one who ends up hurt, so you unintentionally try to hurt someone else so you don't feel that kind of pain. What you'll realize though is that a good man will chase you when you run, and will hold on to you and not let you leave. I'm warning you now though...if you want to keep this man in your life, you need to trust that he won't hurt you because if you keep pushing him away, he will leave, and it will break you more than you'll ever know.

You Will Learn To Trust Him

You're going to realize one day how much you truly do love him, and you are going to take leap of trust. I understand how scary it is, but always remember that pain is inevitable. If someone is going to hurt you, they will. Don't spend the entire relationship wondering what will happen, focus on the present moment. Focusing on distrust will cause the relationship to crumble in half. If he has given you every reason to trust him, hold on too him.

You Will Finally Understand What Real Love Is

You will begin to understand, that the relationship that broke you in the past, used to define your standard of "love", when all along it was far from the real thing. You learned over time that love isn’t meant to hurt you. You learned that love isn’t supposed to break you, but is meant to build you up. The genuine form of love doesn't play games with your heart, or want to see you in pain.When you do find yourself a good man, you will realize that your last relationship wasn’t love, but was nothing, but control, manipulation, and emotional pain.


© 2018 Ashley Riley


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    • SgtCecil profile image

      Cecil Kenmill 

      11 months ago from Osaka, Japan

      Powerful. There's a lot of stuff out there about the signs/symptoms of toxic relationships. This is the first article I've read about what happens afterwards. Well done!

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      16 months ago from The Caribbean

      Thanks for the heads up and the final assurance. Hope someone who needs this help will find it real soon!


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