- Gender and Relationships
10 Ways You Can Make Your Husband Happy and Successful
Surviving the 7 Year Itch
It’s common knowledge that the divorce rate in America today hovers around 50%. As I looked into this statistic and trend, I found that the highest percentage of marriages that end in divorce happen during the 5-9 year mark of a marriage.
I have heard comments here and there about “the seven year itch” but never thought anything of it. It wasn’t until recently that I realized there is actually some truth to that.
My husband and I are coming up upon our 7 year anniversary and we are noticing marriage after marriage around us crumble and go through real strain. Seeing close friends go through such heartache has sparked a lot of great conversation and thought about what it is about 7 years that causes marriages to fail.
I do not claim to know all the answers, but I do feel that speaking from a wives perspective there are several things we can do to create and invest in matrimonial security. Below is a list of 10 ways a wife can make her husband happy and successful, which results in a happy and secure marriage.
10 Ways to Keep your Husband Happy
1. Have Sex- Frequently, creatively, adventurously and willingly. “Give him steak at home, and he won't go out looking for burgers."
2. Feed him- cook hearty family meals at least 3 times a week. Families that eat together stay together
3. Love him in HIS love language. Often we express love in the way we receive it. Be intentional about knowing what your husband’s love language is and love him that way. If you do not know what your love languages are, there is a great book by Gary Chapman called “The 5 Love Languages"
4. Date Nights- get it on the calendar. If you have the money to hire a sitter, make it happen. If you do not have the budget to hire a sitter or splurge on dinner and/or a movie, there are many low budget date ideas
Date Night Ideas
- 20 Pocket-Change Date Night Ideas
Low on cash? Date like you're still in high school and enjoy these twenty fun ideas for cheap dates together.
5. Guys Nights- give him the night off every now and then and spontaneously plan something for him
6. Respect him- do not undercut him, set the example for your kids. Treat him as the King of the house. He is in charge. Build him up with secret heart-felt notes, verbally praise him
7. Let him lead- there is nothing wrong with voicing our opinion on a matter, but ultimately let him make the decisions and support him… even if it’s the wrong one
8. Create a peaceful home for him to walk into after a long day- involve your kids (“let’s clean up for dad… he’s almost home”). Teach your kids to greet him with a welcoming hug and kiss and then give him a few mins of space to settle
9. Have Fun- Find out things your husband loves to do, and join him in them… sports, video games, golfing, shooting range etc.
10. Be his Armor-Bearer- An armor bearer is someone that takes care of a king, or other leader. Their duty is to support, defend, care for and keep watch over him as well as demonstrate extreme loyalty. In 1 Samuel 14 there is a story about Jonathan and his armor bearer. Jonathan tells his armor bearer that he wants to attack the Philistines by themselves. Without hesitation his armor bearer says ““Do all that you have in mind. Go ahead; I am with you heart and soul.” (1 Samuel 14:7). Likewise with our husbands, make it a habit to quote those same words to him. Be your husband’s armor bearer
After 7 years, it’s easy to lose sight of serving one another… especially if you have little ones at home. It’s easy to become so burnt out and weighed down by the stresses in your daily life that you become roommates that share space as opposed to lovers that share life.
Whether your marriage is going through a rough time, or if things are great I want to encourage you to try to incorporate these 10 suggestions into your life. It just might scratch that 7 year itch.
Note to my Hubbie
It’s been an incredible 7 year adventure babe. We’ve gone through the good and the bad, the easy and the hard. I cherish you for always standing by me and putting forth a constant effort to maintain a strong marriage. It’s been a lot of hard work and the rewards are too many to count. May we remain teachable and moldable and enjoy an incredible 7+ more years together. I love you!