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How Do I Get a Girlfriend - 10 Ways to Attract a Woman

Updated on May 27, 2012
She Likes Me !!
She Likes Me !!

A Man's Guide to Attract a Woman

“How do I get a girlfriend?” “How can I attract a woman?” These questions are commonly asked by men when they first start dating and are seriously looking for a girlfriend. They may even know a girl that they like but don’t know how to attract her or what to do to get her interested in them.

Or perhaps this not a first date, but previous dates have not gone so well and it’s back to the drawing board trying to figure out ‘how can I get a girlfriend?’ It may be tempting after several attempts to panic and think that there is something wrong with you. Be comforted in knowing that it is more likely to be what you are doing, rather than you yourself that is the issue.

Just as all men are not the same, neither are all women, but there are sufficient similarities in the genders for these guidelines to be of some help. It is important to realise that your girl is different in ways to other women you may have met, and the trick here is to learn by observing, what these differences are. These will give you clues on how to proceed when you are wondering about how to get a girlfriend.

So let’s get started…

How Do I Get a Girl-Friend:

~: 10 Ways to Attract a Woman :~

1. First Impressions - They say that first impressions are everything and while that is not strictly true, it certainly plays a big part in any relationship. There have been cases of first meetings where a couple were actually repelled by the other and it was only after getting to know each other that they realized they could love one another. If a woman likes what she sees, then she may wish to explore the relationship further, so put your best foot forward. What I mean here is - be the best YOU that you can be.

2. Friendship - Endeavor to be a good friend. Many a woman has married a man who is a best or good friend; so build a friendship with her. Find out what she is interested in, so that you have these things to talk about, and later you can do some of these things together. Spend time together just enjoying being in each others' company. Be interested in her.

3. Communicate – Women like their men to be able to talk with them and share a bit about themselves. Don’t be afraid to open up to her about who you are and what you like. Whenever you engage in conversation, learn how to practice actively listening to her as well. Be attentive and kind.

4. Attitude – Develop a positive attitude so that when you are with her, she will want to be with you. Your genuine smile will be a very attractive feature for her, and give her the feeling that you are happy to see her. A woman is often attracted to confident, assured men and so developing this trait will certainly help you in your goal to get a girlfriend.

5. Touch – When it is appropriate and it appears that she likes you, hugs and gentle touches will signal to her that you would like your friendship to be a little more than that. Signs that she would like you to touch her are usually when she touches you – like when she gently picks stray threads or something like that from your clothing, or she touches your arm or shoulder.

6. Compliments – Appreciate and compliment her when she makes an effort to look nice, or she does something nice for you or someone else. When you make her feel good about her when she is with you, she will also feel good about you. This tells her that you notice her and that you like her.

7. Humor – It is always a good thing to be able to share a laugh together, and sharing clean jokes is a good way to do that. Be wary of any jokes that are at another person's expense as these do not always come off well and can shed a not-so good light on you for her. Laughter helps bond people together.

8. Values – Women look for men who are kind and considerate, and one way they can gauge this is to watch how he relates to members of his family, and also how he treats animals. She will want her man to be something of a ‘hero,’ someone who is honest, and reliable, someone who has integrity. So one way to attract a woman is to be a man of integrity, someone who is kind to her as well as others, someone who is gentle with children and who likes animals.

Nicely groomed guy
Nicely groomed guy | Source

9. Grooming – As much as men are attracted to women who look nice, so are women attracted to men who look and smell good. If you are unsure of how you look to a woman, ask a sister or your mother, or a woman you know whose opinion you value. A wee hint – when it comes to aftershave or cologne, a little is usually more than enough – a woman’s sense of smell is quite well developed.

10. Patience – Don’t be in a hurry to push her into a permanent relationship. Keep the lines of communication open and when you think the time is right, ask her if you can go out together, and later, when you feel that you are both ready for the next level, ask her if she would like to be your girlfriend.

Once she is your girlfriend, keep doing the things that attracted her to you, because they worked. Your relationship will keep growing when you know how to attract a woman, and you keep on loving her that way.

The above list of ways to attract a woman and how to get a girlfriend are not exhaustive, and are in no particular order with the exception of the first one. I hope that this guide gives you a good start in your quest to find your heart’s desire.


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    • Johanna Baker profile imageAUTHOR

      Johanna Mary Elisabeth Baker 

      4 years ago from Christchurch, New Zealand

      savvydating - thank you for your comment. I am very happy that you found the article useful and that you enjoyed it.

    • savvydating profile image


      4 years ago

      Each of your tips are short and sweet, yet still manage to hit the bulls-eye. Truly, your advice for young men who want a girlfriend is darn near perfect. I loved this hub article and I hope young men who read this will take it to heart!

      Voting up and awesome.

    • profile image

      mark alvin casinto 

      4 years ago

      wow nice stile I like it

    • Roman Dolgiy profile image

      Roman Dolgiy 

      4 years ago from Kyiv, Ukraine

      Thanks for such a great advices, first impression is absolutely crucial.

    • SANJAY LAKHANPAL profile image

      Sanjay Sharma 

      4 years ago from Mandi (HP) India

      Nice tips, but there is something missing.

    • Johanna Baker profile imageAUTHOR

      Johanna Mary Elisabeth Baker 

      5 years ago from Christchurch, New Zealand

      Great comment Jan, thank you! Starting out by being friends begins with an ordinary conversation... and I think being friends first is the best place to start.

    • JanMaklak profile image


      5 years ago from Canada

      Not having dated since I was married (33 yrs) may be a bit out if touch but I would also advise a person dating not to be too shy. There are a lot of great people out there who probably like you but don't express it well enough for you to pick up on it. Start the conversation and after a while it will become apparent whether a potential partner is warming up or not.

    • soconfident profile image

      Derrick Bennett 

      6 years ago

      Great advice Tweeted hub

    • Johanna Baker profile imageAUTHOR

      Johanna Mary Elisabeth Baker 

      6 years ago from Christchurch, New Zealand

      Thanks Amy for your kind comments.

    • Amy Becherer profile image

      Amy Becherer 

      6 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      What a great write! It is difficult to write on a topic of this nature without either sounding silly or juvenile, but you approached it with sincerity, intellect and great, practical ideas. It seems to me that, from a female vantage point, many men would find this information valuable. Awesomely done, Johanna.

    • Johanna Baker profile imageAUTHOR

      Johanna Mary Elisabeth Baker 

      6 years ago from Christchurch, New Zealand

      Thanks for your comments about humor...I agree, really vital to bonding relationships

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      What makes me attracted to guys who can just be laid back and have fun with me and humor is a big thing to for me about guys. Very Good Hub!!!!

    • michememe profile image

      Miche Wro 

      6 years ago

      This is a good hub, humor is big with me. With so much going wrong in life, it good to laugh!

    • Johanna Baker profile imageAUTHOR

      Johanna Mary Elisabeth Baker 

      6 years ago from Christchurch, New Zealand

      Thank you Joey

    • profile image


      6 years ago

      Very good hub!

    • Johanna Baker profile imageAUTHOR

      Johanna Mary Elisabeth Baker 

      6 years ago from Christchurch, New Zealand

      Absolutely! Comes under the heading of being the best you, you can other words be yourself. Thanks for your kind comment.

    • mjboomer profile image

      Mike Elzner 

      6 years ago from Oregon

      Great advice, I would also add be real


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