- Gender and Relationships
19 Signs The Relationship Is No Longer Fulfilling
We do know relationships do not complete us fully. For instance, relationships don’t bring us total happiness. Most of the happiness comes from within us. If we are not happy by ourselves we can never be happy in relationships. Even so, it doesn’t mean relationship in itself isn’t fulfilling. It is at some level.
When you fall in love it leads to emotional bonding thus the formation of relationship. You feel you are in heaven. Love is something beautiful. As months go by you enjoy each other’s presence and long for it to continue leading to marriage. After you’re married you also long it will continue till death separate the two of you. Nonetheless, during the relationship you feel not right about the relationship you’re in.
There are various reasons why some relationships die early while others die some years later. The major reason why breakups happen is because of lack of fulfillment. You did feel fulfilled in the relationship but along the way you began feeling not fulfilled. You no longer feel complete in the relationship. You feel you shouldn’t be in the relationship.
The following are signs to look out for which indicate you are feeling unfulfilled in the relationship.
1. Hope the Relationship Ends
You always wish the relationship to come an end. Every single day you hope the next day or during the week the relationship will come to an end. You envision the relationship coming to an end and possibly you come up with ways to end the relationship. You imagine different ways you’re going to end the relationship.
2. You Loathe Your Partner
Your partner no longer appeals to your senses as he used to. You don’t feel like talking to him. You avoid him as much as possible. You chat less and talk less, faking you’re always busy. You spend most of your time in work and with your friends and/or loved ones. The sight of your partner makes you want the ground to swallow you.
3. You Argue A Lot
You tend to bring up issues of no importance. You are always arguing. What you are arguing doesn’t make sense. You don’t miss anything to argue about. You engage your partner in fight of words because you no longer feel fulfilled in the relationship. It is always arguing, always screaming.
4. Fantasize Ideal Relationship
If you are fantasizing what a perfect relationship should look like and what a perfect partner should look like, then you are tired of the relationship. If you wish your partner is like a character you have read in a novel or watched in a television program, then you are tired of your partner. What you had always hoped for, you finally realize is not the case.
5. Your Wants and Needs No Longer Fulfilled
If you feel your partner no longer satisfies your needs and wants, then you get tired of the relationship. You want ‘out’ of the relationship. He no longer fits as your ideal partner because he doesn’t meet your needs and wants. Even the relationship itself doesn’t meet your needs. It is as long as your needs and wants are satisfied that’s when you feel fulfilled in the relationship.
6. Your Partner Raises Questions
When you notice your partner has changed for the worse, you will no longer enjoy the relationship. If all of a sudden your partner has begun behaving in ways he didn’t, then you feel at loss and don’t want to continue in the relationship with him. For example, if he always objects to what you say then it feels you don’t have a say in the relationship. You end up feeling like a liability in the relationship, not a collaborator who together with your partner has formed this institution called relationship.
7. You’re Always the One
When you feel you’re the one who is always doing all you can to make the relationship stand on its two feet, then it arrives at a point you get tired with the relationship and your partner. If you are the one who is giving all of yourself to the relationship and your partner is not contributing in any way, then you feel mentally and physically exhausted.
8. Thinking About Someone
If you are thinking about someone such as your ex then it signifies you don’t feel welcome in the relationship. The thought of thinking about someone who you would want to be in relationship with is a sure sign your partner no longer holds any place in your heart. He doesn’t make you feel complete in the relationship.
9. Please Your Partner
If you always want to please your partner in order to continue in the relationship with him, then you aren’t fulfilled in the relationship. You are not supposed to please your partner so that he appreciates you. If he didn’t appreciate you before you hit the road of the relationship, there is no way he is going to appreciate you. Therefore, if all you do is trying to please your partner, then you feel miserable in the relationship – you don’t want to accept that fact.
10. Your Partner Abuses You
If your partner abuses you but still hold on then it means the relationship is not satisfying you. A healthy relationship is not based on abuses. Ill-treatment holds no place in healthy relationships. There are reasons why you are holding on in an abusive relationship: you are suffering from love addiction or you always hope your partner will change because you love him. However, as long as he abuses you it is quite clear the relationship isn’t fulfilling as you had thought it will be.
11. Love Waning
If you no longer love him as you used to then you are no longer interested in the relationship. If your feelings for your partner have dwindled then it is evident you no longer feel emotionally bounded to your partner. Love binds but if love is weakening the bond becomes weaker and weaker until the bond is no more.
12. No Longer Trusts Your Partner
If you no longer trust your partner then there is no way you’re going to feel fulfilled in the relationship. While it is true you shouldn’t trust your partner a hundred percent, if your trust for your partner has been decreasing then love is useless. Without trust there is no love. Without love there is no emotional bonding. If there is no emotional bonding then a relationship is ineffectual.
13. You Behave Differently
You used to do things together. Nowadays, you do things differently. Your partner is watching television in the sitting room; you are in the bedroom watching some videos on YouTube. The program your partner is watching is a program which interests you. The thought of watching a program together with your partner agitates you. There is no longer any co-ordination. You are behaving like children who live in an egocentric world – their own world.
14. Emotional Bonding
If you don’t feel an emotional bonding then it means something is wrong. It is the emotional bonding that keeps you people together. If you don’t feel an emotional bonding - day-by-day the bonding weakens - to your partner it means the bonding has been severed by some issues that have cropped or keep cropping up in the relationship.
15. No Longer Misses Your Partner
If you no longer miss your partner it is evident you are no longer interested in him or the relationship. Missing your partner indicates you still have feelings for him. Therefore, if you don’t miss your partner it signifies you no longer have feelings for him meaning you no longer love him.
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16. Feel Unappreciated
You shouldn’t do something in order to please somebody. On the other hand, if you don’t feel appreciated or valued then you are not going to feel like your partner does love you. You will feel like you are ghost in the relationship. Appreciating a partner makes the partner feel she is valued that she is part of the relationship and it means a lot to her to be in the relationship with you.
17. Prefer Singleness
You wish better be single than in a relationship. If time after time you feel singleness is the better option, then it shows you don’t feel relationship is fulfilling at any level. You feel better be single as it is more fulfilling than being in a relationship. You no longer see the relationship as you used to. It no longer appeals to you.
18. Frequent Fights
You are always fighting. You are always throwing at each other abusive words, always arguing. A week never ends without an argument. Unlike in the first case indicated above whereby you’re the one who is always arguing; in this case it is both of you always arguing. If the relationship is characterized by endless arguments then it’s not a healthy relationship. Unhealthy relationship is not fulfilling.
Without communication a relationship cannot endure for long. If you rarely communicate or communicate in instances, then none of you feel like talking to each other. If you don’t feel like talking to each other then you don’t like each other meaning you no longer want to be with each other. We communicate because we need each other. If we don’t communicate it means you or I are not important to each other.